ethereal : it oneshots

if you don't love me now

pairing: stozier

a/n: guess what movie i just watched that broke my heart based on this drabble 

stanley sat on his own, next to the fireplace, but in front of the couch. richie sat on the couch, on the opposite end from where stanley was. there was hardly any noise, except for that of the fireplace, and faint music upstairs. stanley blamed that on bill, it was his house after all.

it was the aftermath of a house party, and richie felt drunk as all hell. you could see it in his drooping eyes, and you could hear it in the slurring of his voice. stanley was also drunk, but hardly close to richie's level. 

the fireplace crackled, and richie opened his mouth.

"i wanna talk to you, stan." he said, the s in stan dragging on a little long.

"alright, we're talking,"

"no, i wanna really talk to you. like..." richie trailed off, and stanley looked up at him. richie made eye contact, and his breath hitched. "stan, what do you see me as?"

"what do you mean?" stanley asked, though he was afraid he knew what richie meant. richie seemed to look through stanley. his eyes dulled for a moment.

"what am i to you?"

"rich, you're my best friend," stanley replied, watching richie shake his head tentatively. richie looked away from stan, playing with his fingers. 

"no, i know that, idiot. best friends... i know. that's okay. we can... we can be best friends." richie said, the words falling out of his mouth as quietly as possible. richie felt like he could see in his head every moment that they had ever spent together so clearly. 

"richie, i..." it was stanley's turn to trail off, apparently, "i don't like boys." stan was still looking up at richie, who finally looked back at him. 

"you've fucked a guy or two, though," richie spat back, still slightly drunk despite the sobriety the conversation had given him. stanley's mouth fell open a little.

"that's different... fucking and loving isn't the same thing. boys don't love each other." stan said, maintaining his stare while richie stared straight at the fireplace. it crackled on while richie thought through his words. 

"i mean... i don't know, stan. i don't think that's true. i mean, i love you, and we're both boys, right?" richie mumbled, stanley's gaze not dropping for a second. even the music seemed to have stopped. richie picked at his fingernails aggressively. stanley couldn't speak. "goodnight, stan," and richie turned around on the couch, facing the back and curled up into a ball. "i do love you, though. goodnight." 

there was a moment of silence, and stanley wondered how drunk richie really was.

"come here, rich," and with a simple utter, richie clamoured off the couch onto the ground next to stanley. stanley engulfed him in a hug, one arm under richie's arm whilst the other landed on his shoulder, pulling his head closer. richie was crossed against stanley's body, but his face landed in stan's neck, so he wasn't complaining.

they shuffled a little, waiting for richie to get comfortable. stan's hand, that had been resting on richie's shoulder moved upward to richie's head when he began to kiss stan's neck. stanley said nothing, richie simply kissing up and down the side of stan's neck as he buried his head further into stan. stanley turned towards richie for a moment, kissing him on the head. this relaxed richie, whose arms reached further up stanley's chest. stanley sighed lightly, and placed his face gently into richie's arm, closing his eyes gently.