Is This Family?

Chapter 54:Dear Diary

A YEAR LATER

Katherine Wright

Dear Diary,
It's been a while since I wrote something. Just so much happened in the last few months. All good luckily. You know I just wonder how my life changed so much. I used to be that lonely and depressed person, who couldn't live for herself. When I used to look in the mirror before I just wanted to fade away. But now I see myself as someone happy and content.
All of this was possible because of my six overbearing, overprotective, and loving brothers. One of them who finds it difficult to show his emotions but still loves all of us. But now that he's married to Alicia he's better at showing how he feels. One of them who can stand up for me even against the others. One who looks all hard and tough with the muscles and tattoos but can be one of the biggest softies for me. One who has been my first best friend.  One who is stupid enough to apply resin wax and wash it with water. I can never get over that one. And one who is a big big emotional cutie.
And Ofcourse there's dad, who calls me an angel and treats me like a princess.
All these emotions of love, care, concern and compassion were foreign to me. But that changed. They changed it.
I admired how I grew. I grew for myself. I learned to love myself.
I learned so much in these last few years. I learned to explore my feelings. To deal with my pain. I explored a social side of me.  I learned how my life wasn't mine alone anymore. That so many people cared about me. And that so many people would die with me if I were to die.
I met someone who I miss every minute. I just don't understand how Gabriel grew on to me so much. His face. His menacing grey eyes. Him calling me Preziosa. At first I believed that it was just an infatuation. But I think it's something more than that. I like to think that. But I had never seen him after the day I left Italy. He did occasionally sent me flowers which made me grin like a Cheshire cat. But that stopped a while ago. I wonder why. Maybe he found someone else. I dont know.
Romance wasn't on my checklist. Not for now at least. I want to get into a good college on my own. And I want to focus on that. I want to make my brothers proud of me.
Speaking of them, Alex married Alicia 8 months ago and I couldn't be anymore happier for him. He needed someone like her. Anna and Hayden are engaged at the moment and are enjoying their lives focusing on each other and their careers. Leo was on again off again with Candice. But I believe at the end they'll find their way to each other. Nate says he's enjoying his life as a bachelor and that he'll like to keep it that way. And the twins are dating the twins. Well it was a news to me. Silas and Val had been public about their relationship. But it was Seb and Ness who were sneaky. Very sneaky.
And then there's me, who's probably gonna die single. Yeah believe me. I don't know I just feel scared. Scared of being hurt again.  I was weak when it came to matters of the heart. It was hard for me to make a decision. But it was okay for now. Not to forget the literal storm that would come when my brothers and dad would find out. But even though I feel scared I want someone to come along and free me from that fear. One who would say he'd never leave me. That he would never break my heart.
I couldn't wrap my mind around the sense of familiarity that came with that thought. I mean I never thought I would have such a loving family. But that changed. So maybe this will change too. Maybe I'll find someone. Soon.
Just like how mom said when I met her. She said she saw true love very close to me. And i believe her. Maybe it is. Only time will tell.
As Thor once said,' The only thing permanent in life is impermanence.' Well maybe someone else said it but I don't know. No offense.
Maybe there will be changes ahead. Maybe there is a different life ahead of me then what i think. But only time will tell.
But through all the thick and thin of my life, through all that pain and love, through everything beyond, there is only thing that holds that permanence for me. There's only one thing I believe that'll stay like it is forever. And that's what I feel looking at my family photo on my desk,

This is family.

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Hello readers, Oh my God. So many emotions are going through me right now. It feels happy yet sad. That this book finally comes to an end. It was a rollercoaster for me. How I felt flooded with words to how I felt the lack of ideas everything is flashing through my eyes. But y'all are a huge and inseparable part of this book. You always will be. I love you all so much. Thank you for everything.
But with a heavy heart I need to tell you all a few things.
I'm going offline from wattpad for a while. 6 months at least. Dont worry you'll be getting the sequel. I promise. But it's under wraps right now. It needs a lot of thinking and inspiration. Romance isn't an easy genre at all. It's very deep and it needs exploring.
My decision is both personal and creative. I want more people to explore this book. I'm not gonna force anyone for reads or votes or anything. I love my silent readers just as well. But as I said I need time to draft. You won't believe the hours I'm spending on pinterest, running after every single detail.
And also that I need some time to myself. I mentioned how my health has been in the past few months. I almost faced death. But thanks to the amazing doctors and my friends and family who helped me through this phase. But it was an eye opener. How health is as important as everything else. So I'm gonna travel for a while with my sister. Figure out college. Figure out my feelings and everything.
I know y'all must be hating me right now. But I'm not delaying the sequel because of my personal issues. I dont want to give you all a crappy story with dull chapters. I know you all must be having high expectations from it. And I don't to let anyone down.
So believe me I'm doing this for the best. As I said I'm logging out. So I won't be able to recieve your comments or messages unless it's within the next 12 hours.
I'll be releasing the cast and the poster in this book in the next hour. Stay tuned.
For updates of the sequel you can either follow me, or keep my book in archive or your library or reading list. I'll give a note in this book itself when I release the sequel.
Again sorry if I hurt any of your feelings in any way. But I believe y'all will understand my feelings and wishes.
I love ya all so so so much. And I'll miss you all a lot.
Lots of love
Writer ❤