If It Hurts This Much (Chaelisa)

Chapter 9

The apartment is cold and empty, and Lisa's still lying on the sofa with her arm thrown over her head. She has absolutely no idea what she's going to say when Chaeyoung walks in. What the hell is she supposed to say? The lock on the door clicks. Well, she's about to find out.

"Lisa?"

Lisa doesn't answer Chaeyoung's call; instead buries her nose in further to the crook of her elbow, hoping to feign being asleep, or possibly dead – that's how much she doesn't want to explain her actions. Her eyes are cracked open slightly at the corner, so she can see Chaeyoung gliding across the apartment, placing her keys and jacket down so domestically. Lisa inwardly groans - sometimes she wishes she hadn't let Chaeyoung stay here for Christmas – it seems so normal to live in the same apartment as the blonde. And not in the just roommates way, either.

There's a dip beside her right hip, and seconds later cool fingers wrap around her wrist, the one covering her face. "Lisa," Chaeyoung whispers, and Lisa can tell just how close the blonde is by the hot breath hitting her cheek, "Lisa."

Grudgingly, she allows the arm to be taken away, and seconds later she's staring up at her best friend who's now moved back so there's a reasonable distance between them. Lisa brings her arms down beside her bother, propping herself up onto her elbows and ducks her chin to her chest, eyes focusing on the sparkling lights decorating the Christmas tree at the end of the sofa.

Chaeyoung flashes a small smile, "Hi," she says quietly, her eyes searching Lisa's.

Lisa pauses, curious to why Chaeyoung's not angry or asking questions. "Hi," she repeats, slowly.

"Are you alright?" Chaeyoung shuffles further into the sofa, pushing Lisa's left side into the back of it. Considering she walked out on Chaeyoung, whilst Chaeyoung was in mid-conversation, and stormed off like she was a teenager again, actively rebelling against something she didn't like – this is a pretty odd reaction to have. Shouldn't Chaeyoung be like shouting, screaming and demanding answers?

"Aren't you mad?" Lisa ignores Chaeyoung's question. She's too curious. "I stormed out."

Chaeyoung shrugs. "I know," she reaches over and brushes a lock of Lisa's hair behind her ear. "But I'm not mad."

Lisa drops back to the sofa, until her head hits the cushions. Her palms come up to her face and the heels of them dig into her eyes, trying to rub out the frustration. In some ways she wants Chaeyoung to be mad at her; she wants Chaeyoung to demand answers – even if she doesn't have a clue what she'd respond.

"Why?" Lisa spits out, a little sharper than intended. "Why aren't you mad?"

"Why should I be?"

Lisa snorts and shakes her head. The way Chaeyoung's being so damn non-chalant about her reaction is really starting to bug her. If it were reversed, she'd be questioning left, right and centre. She can feel the eyes looking at her carefully and tries not to focus on how nervous it's making her as she pushes her palms further into her face, in attempt to stop the shaking. Pale fingers trace their way down the back of her hand, down to her wrist and then down an invisible line on her forearm – she guesses it's supposed to be comforting or whatever, but it's not, the touch is just like a burning hot pan. Except it's a comfortable sensation. It's complicated.

"Is there a reason?" Chaeyoung continues, pausing as she restarts tracing over the invisible line in a loop, "That I should be mad?" Her voice is so calm and innocent that it actually spurs a shot of anger that pulses through Lisa's body.

"Yes!" Lisa yells and lurches forward, swinging her legs off the edge and pushing Chaeyoung to the far end of the sofa. Within seconds she's up, forefinger and thumb pinching the bridge of her nose whilst the other hand is cocked on her hip. "Doesn't it bother you that I just walked out?" Her voice is unnecessarily loud, but she can't bring herself to lessen the volume - probably because of the anger pulsing through her veins.