FNAF on Drugs: Bonnie on Crack, 5 Nerds at Freddy's, and other jacked-up stories

NOPE

ONE DAY:
*naz and the animatronics are having an intelligent conversation on cocaine*
Naz: Naw, man, we should go to the marijuana shop down on 21rst street for the best deals.
Freddy: The weed shop is better.
Chica: Aren't they the same thing?
Naz and Freddy: Buzz off, birdbrain.
Chica (crosses arms and humphs): Rude.
*a loud and feminine scream rings out from the kitchen*
Naz: oh no...
Author: AAAAAAAJDJEBSIFJWBFNXBAKDLKF
Naz: What the heck, bruh?!
Author (sprinting to the office with a seemingly empty glass): THERE'S A HUGE F***ING NOPE TAKING A DIP IN MY DRINK!!!
Goldie: A what now?
Author (throws the glass at Bonnie): GET IT AWAYYYYYYYYY
Bonnie: I don't see anyth-
*a spider crawls out of the glass and onto Bonnie's nose*
Bonnie: ooooooOOOOOOH SH!T NO NOPE NOPE NOPE IM OUT *runs away*
Freddy: Chicken!
Bonnie: Fatbear!
Author: Man, that must be one abusive relationship.
Clueless: I LIKE PURPLE
THE END