Chapter 14

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*LINDSEY POV*

When I got home I walked in and my mom greeted me happily, I had called to tell her I didn't feel well and was coming home early. She hugged me and took my things and put them in my room. I grabbed some cereal and went to my room. I sat on my bed with Netflix on and I decided to see if I had any messages on my phone. Hayes had texted me once but hasn't called me yet.

Hayes❤️- Hey! So Emily said you weren't feeling well and that she took you to the room to let you rest and said she would check in on you❤️ sorry you feel bad but I'll see you in 2 short hours! I love you.

She didn't tell him yet. Why didn't she tell him yet? 'Snap out of it Lindsey! You don't care about him anymore. Your suppose to be hating him!' But I can't hate Hayes, I love him more than anything. If I don't carry on with this though, Emily will tell everyone everything and I just can't.

I was about to go to sleep that night when my phone started ringing.

"Hello?" I knew it was Hayes because that's what the caller ID said.

"You left...why would you leave I thought everything was okay. Do I need to come home? IS everything okay? Are WE okay?" He sounded hurt and kind of worried. I wanted to say I love you and that I'm sorry and that everything is fine but that would cause me a lot of trouble with Emily, so I did as I was told.

"Hayes, there is no US. I'm fine but I don't want to do this anymore. Don't come back yet and just go back to being Hayes, before I came. Pretend I'm not here and I'll do the same with you." I tried to not let him know that I was crying. This is the most painful thing I've ever had to do I think.

"But I don't understand, I thought we were fine..." He was hurt, I could tell it from his voice.

"Hayes, you said you wanted me to be happy and that you would do what would make me happy. Well this is what I want, do this and I will be happy. Good-bye Hayes." I hung up before he could say anything. I crawled under the covers and curled up into a ball. I cried so hard and I just wanted to lay there and not get up.

I barely got any sleep that night so when 5am rolled around I finally fell asleep only to be awakened by my 7 o'clock alarm. I guess I forgot to turn off my alarms but it was okay because school started back in three days which meant Hayes came home today. I didn't want to see him because I knew I couldn't face him.

When his car pulled up next door I was outside sitting on my front porch. They climbed out of his moms car and Skylynn ran from the house to greet them with hugs. They all headed and none of them made eye contact except their mom. She waved and asked how I was doing and told me to have a nice day. I was a little hurt that Hayes didn't notice me but that's what I wanted right? To keep my secrets safe even though I had to push him away.

I sat there swinging back on our porch swing when I looked up to see Hayes standing on my porch. I wanted to leap up from the bench and wrap my arms around him and for him to wrap his around me but instead I sat there in silence because I knew what I had to do.

"So, that'll make two girls that I cared about who left me because I hurt them." He finally broke the silence but that's not what I wanted to hear. It made me feel worse and I wanted to say something so that maybe he would understand.

"Hayes, I'm sorry it's just-" he cut me off before I could finish apologizing.
"Don't be. I only came over here to say I'm sorry for bringing you into all this and that I hope your okay." He sat beside me and rested his hand on mine. I wanted to hug him and cry and say I'm sorry but I had to stick to the plan.

"Hayes I'm sorry I can't do this, just leave me alone please." I got up and so did he. He grabbed both of my hands and held them in his and looked in my eyes making me want to melt completely.
"STOP I HATE YOU!" I yelled those three words knowing they weren't true and I think they hurt me more than they hurt him.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you," he dropped my hands and and looked back at me trying to be polite like I never said that, "how about we forget all this? Forget there ever was a me and you that way neither of us can find a way to hurt each other any more?" He was so angry and he had every right to be. I lied, broke my promise, left him, and I didn't even give him a reason.

"Sounds great to me, just pretend none of this happened and we never spent those horrible times together and we won't have to disgust ourselves thinking about each other any longer!" I said it but I didn't mean it. I didn't know where this was coming from or why and it hurt me so much because those times were great and I love him!

"Good! See you around!" He shouted at me with pain in his eyes, anger in his voice, but most of all, hurt in his heart.

Tears poured down my face as he walked away and I turned to the door and ran upstairs into my room. I slammed my door and sat on my bed staring out my window. God, I was so tired of sitting on this bed everyday! I climbed out my window and sat on the roof staring at the back yard from on top of my house. I looked down to see Hayes sitting outside on his back porch, he was slightly crying but I could tell he was holding a lot back. It hurt me to see him like this because I never wanted to hurt him. What hurt most of all though is seeing Emily walk through his back door and sit outside with him. They hugged and then she spoke, I knew I shouldn't have eased dropped but they were practically shouting so I listened.

"Hayes I knew she was bad for you, the moment she arrived all she has done was cause trouble." She was now sitting very close to him and trying to comfort him.

"That's not true, it's my fault she left. I shouldn't have taken here to Magcon so soon." He thought all of this was his fault? Well of course he did, that's how I made it seem.

"No it's not Hayes, it's not your fault at all," then it happened. They both leaned in and kissed right there. It killed me to see him kiss her knowing she was the reason I did this. It crushed every ounce of strength I had left. I climbed back into my room, ran down the stairs, grabbed my skateboard, and I took off. I didn't tell my mom where I was going or when I would be back because honestly I didn't know these answers myself.

*HAYES POV*

It was real late and we had just finished dinner when I heard a knock at the door.

"I got it mom!" I opened the door to see Lindsey's mother standing there looking very worried.

"Oh hey Ms. Smith, may I help you? Is everything alright?" She seemed frantic and shaking.

"She's gone! Lindseys gone have you seen her?!"

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AUTHORS NOTE: sorry for any errors I didn't have time to read over it but I hope you enjoy!

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