Is it really worth it?

"She is not fine and she needs someone to finally realise that."

2 hours later Maya, Carina, Andy, and Vic found themselves in the park. Maya recognized it from all her jogs. This was her normal route. Carina was carrying a large basket with all kinds of food in it. Food that Maya would usually never dear to touch. They put a large blanket all over the moist grass and made a little circle around the food and drinks. Vic was the only one who didn't have a clue what was going. Who thought this was all just for fun and friendship. But clearly, it wasn't.

*Don't make them suspect anything is wrong. You managed to hide this for more than 15 years, you'll manage a few more. Even with somebody like Carina by your side. I don't want them to think I'm crazy. I'm not. I'm really not *

Maya tried to make sense of all her thoughts which like always didn't seem to be working seamlessly. At all. Her hands were shaking and they started to sweat. She didn't want this. She didn't want to eat. But now she had to. If not the consequences would be worse. Andy was talking to Vic, while Carina was watching her trembling girlfriend try not to eye the food. "Did anyone bring tequila?" Vic asked with a mischievous smile forming on her lips. Andy nodded eagerly just as excited for the tequila as the rest.

It started to get more relaxed over time, but the clear tension was still between all of them. Maya tried to get out of the situation by going to the toilet, which weirdly worked. They let her leave.

"See there is nothing wrong with her," Andy said certainly happy with that result. Vic just looked at her with pure confusion written all over her face. "What do you mean? Is there supposed to be something wrong?" Carina and Andy both ignored her question and just moved on in their discussion. "That's what she wants us to think. Can't you see how much her hands are shaking or how she keeps on looking at the food? She is not fine and she needs someone to finally realize that." Carina got angry and didn't want anyone denying the fact that her girlfriend needed help. It might not be a great success, no one wants their perfect girlfriend to be sick or sad. But someone has to help her and Carina was all in.
"Wait what the hell is going on guys?"
Vic's soft and worried voice ripped Andy and Carina from their conversation. "You don't know yet? Haven't you noticed? See this is what I mean she has gotten so good at hiding her pain nobody ever saw that something was so awfully wrong. She has an eating disorder, Vic. I think it's gotten pretty bad. So we are trying to do something."
The next few moments were a tense silence in which no one dared to speak. Next thing they knew Maya was standing next to them again with a huge smile on her face. It was most certainly not a real one but at least it was there and it comforted the rest. The atmosphere was uncomfortable. Luckily Maya didn't hear the conversation. She just sat back into her girlfriend's lab and continued drinking her wine.

*Why are they all looking at me. Did they figure something out? Did I do something? I haven't been acting suspiciously have I? Maybe they don't want me here. Maybe they all actually hate me.*

Maya's thoughts were spiraling again and she couldn't make them stop but that was something that was very usual. No one said a word. Still, there was her girlfriend softly playing with the tips of Maya's short hair. She always does it and Maya always feels safe when she does, not being used to the tenderness. Vic was eating olives and drinking a glass of wine. Andy was the only one still not moving.

2 hours later the atmosphere had cooled down and everyone seemed to be satisfied again. It might have been the wine and tequila but who knows. "I see you guys on shift tomorrow." Vic tried pointing at Maya and Andy but her hand was in a completely other direction. One couldn't blame her, but you could blame the wine. Maya just nodded. Eager to get home and be alone with her dear girlfriend. They packed their things and everybody went their different ways. Of course, no one drove they were all way too drunk for driving anything. So Maya and Carina called a taxi. Maya was closed tightly into Carina's arms. The only place those thoughts would stop spinning. The taxi came minutes later. Tired, they threw themselves in. Both of them were terribly tired but on the other hand wide awake.

They got home at about 1 a.m. Maya stumbled along the hall of their house and got a glass of water for herself and her beloved girlfriend. She brought it into the big bedroom. Carina was already waiting for her. Maya held out her strong arm trying to make the brunette grab the glass but she didn't. She just looked at Maya with big eyes. "Come sit." Maya obeyed that order gladly and sat next to her on the end of the bed. She put the glasses down and looked deep into Carina's beautiful brown eyes. She leaned forward and placed a short kiss on her lips. She tried to pull away but Carina wouldn't let her. She pulled Maya closer and kissed her faster and faster. Maya kissed her back with passion and delight. Their lips were perfectly in sync and both of them enjoyed the soft but passionate kisses. This felt right. It has always felt right being with the person she loved most without the worries of the world. Happy just to have her loved one next to her. She yearned for Carina's touch and wanted to feel her body close. She craved exactly this and wanted nothing more than to be near to her. This was where she wanted to be...

The next morning she woke up happy. Remembering the events of last night. Even though she was drunk the memory didn't fade. A smile was placed on her lips when she felt a warm touch on the side of her arm. They looked at each other and smiled, without any movement at all. Just smiled.