PENNY
I just finished getting ready, my therapist is with me. It's day 21 today. I'm anxious. I have been living in the perfect bubble. I've been to the beach. To the mountains. I've been living the dream. I'm healthy. My mind is at peace. I have dealt with my loss. All the loss. Loss of my parents. Moving from relative to relative. Losing the love of my life. I believed he was my soul mate.
You will ask me why I wasn't eating. I just didn't have an appetite and if I forced myself, I threw it all up. My mind was messed up because I had nowhere to turn. With no-one to trust. I found myself all alone and it hurt. My body just shut down. My imune system gave in and I found myself quarantined.
It wouldn't have made a difference anyways because I am all alone in the world. Senzo has his wife, that lady had a wedding ring on and the look on his face said it all. Tshepo has Mpho.
I finally have someone to live for now. My doctor quarantined me from my babies. Yes that crazy white man wanted me to find myself, heal my body. Then we deal with the little people. Between Thabile and Justin I have a super team. One caring for my body and the other my mind. They moved me here when I was strong enough, but they still came here twice a day. From tomorrow it will be once a day, then twice a week, then once a week. Then we see. It's a 3 bedroom townhouse, in a peaceful estate. I own it. The deed is in my name, no, I never paid for it. It's R2mil gift, anonymously acquired.
Thabile told me he was Tshepo's friend. He promised me discretion and in the past few weeks I've seen it. He asked if he can let him come see me and I agreed. I'm so nervous, my doctors are nervous, I swear they think I'm their child. Their toddler going off to school for the first time. I'm on my balcony, sitting on my couch watching geese on the lake. Someone clears their throat. I look up.
ANDILE
I have never seen anything more beautiful. My wife. She looks like she's been bathing in buttered milk. My thoughts are wheezing past at 200km/hr, I can't even string a sentence together. I am so overwhelmed I kneel before her and I can't stop my tears from falling. She is so perfect.
Me: You are beautiful
Her:.......
Me: I have so many things to say to you. So many things to show you.
Her: Tshepo
I put my finger on her lips. My thick soft lips. How I miss them. WAIT I'M DERAILING!!!
Me: Please call me Andile
She looks so shocked, I can see tears forming in her eyes.
Me: Don't cry my queen. Yes, it's your Andile. I am back.
She just cries and I hold her in my arms. So tight. Everything about this moment feels so right. I carry to the bed. Yes, I can carry my sdudla. I take off my shoes and cover us with a blanket and let her lay on my chest. We are not asleep, we are not speaking. We are just in each other. Our breathing synced, heartbeats intertwined. We finally doze off after forever. She tries to move out of my grip and I startle. I thought she wanted to leave me but no she woke me up needing to use the loo. It's now 2am, we missed lunch and supper and we are famished. We could've slept more, but I had to get her fed. My babies need the food. We get to the kitchen and warm up something from the fridge to eat.
No one wants to say anything to the other. I know I don't deserve to be in her presence, but she hasn't chased me out yet. When we get back to the room we strip and go under the covers. I can't help the tears that keep flowing from my eyes. This feels surreal. My Penny just holds me.
PENNY
The minute he said his name was Andile, I knew he was back. I knew something had shifted. I am holding his head to my chest as he cries. My heart is mending as his is breaking. I need his breakdown to ease mine. How does he know what my heart needs right now. He starts kissing my chest. You have to understand it has been a minute since we shared any form of intimacy apart from that morning shag. He moves his lips to mine with so much hunger. I am so drawn to every touch. My senses are at peek. I have never felt like this. He has never been so hungry for me. I let myself die in the moment. I allow my emotions to be immersed in this wave of bliss. Everything about this moment is so spiritual. I feel him enter me, an orgasm hits me immediately. He starts moving so slow this man is not rushing anywhere. It's just him and my body.
If I wasn't pregnant already, what happened last night would have ended with triplets.
