𝒂𝒏𝒈𝒆𝒓 𝒎𝒂𝒏𝒂𝒈𝒆𝒎𝒆𝒏𝒕 || 𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘯 𝘫.

𝟓

contains
mentions of gaslighting
emotional abuse
mature language
mentions of drug use
___________________________________

It was currently Friday, and I was driving home from school. School was going good for the most part, I hadn't had an issue yet. I finally arrived home and was greeted by my mom, the times she was home she'd usually try to talk to me which i'd normally just shrug off. My mom and I didn't have the best relationship, sure I still loved her and loved being around her but whenever we got into arguments, or I'd ever try to voice concerns with her, it always resulted the completely wrong way. I always felt like I was never being heard by her. So I went into the kitchen where my mom was and put away my keys, as I was leaving she called out for me.

I already know where this is heading.

"Come back in here, I want to talk to you for a minute." said my mom.

My heart started racing, my anxiety peaking. I carefully took a seat and waited for her to start talking. I bounced my leg up and down, playing with my nails. I was fidgeting in any way possible to cope with the way I was currently feeling.

"How was your day?"

Did she really just get me all worked up just for that?

"Good, why?"

"Was just wondering. What am I not allowed to be concerned?"

Of course, she'd say something like that.

Ever since my mental health started declining my mom had become worried about me. Though she never got me the proper help I ever needed, she did try to be there. She'd tell me it was okay to talk to her. Which wasn't true because then she'd go telling everyone what I said, and would usually end up victim blaming her self or gas lighting me.

"I never said that. Did you really just call me back in here to ask how my day went?"

I could feel myself getting frustrated, I know that I wasn't supposed to be getting angry over something so stupid but for some reason I always did. She was just asking me how my day went, and I was being an asshole to her, for no reason.

"It's not like you have anything better to do. why not come spend some time with me, I feel like I never see you."

Ya because anytime I do spend time with you, you find something to point out that's wrong about me, I thought.

"No, not right now. I'm tired. I'm gonna go upstairs."

With that I left the kitchen and made my way up to my room. In actuality, I thought she caught me smoking, that's why I was so nervous.

I got into my bed scrolling on TikTok as usual. Then I remembered Jean's party.

Shit

I still hadn't decided if I was going to go or not. I was anxious about the idea, I mean I hadn't talked to anyone in over 7 months. I missed them though, I missed the way we'd all laugh and hangout. Though I no longer had the luxury of hanging out with them, but this was my chance. Not only that, but I was scared to step out of my comfort zone, scared of the possibilities of what could happen at the party. As long as I was high everything would be fine. I texted Jean letting him know I had made my decision about coming to the party. He was glad to hear that I wanted to go. I found myself smiling, something I rarely ever did.

Maybe things could go back to how they were. Maybe we could all become friends again, I thought.

Tomorrow was the day of the party and as of now I was just pondering on the idea of what would happen at the party tomorrow. That's when I remembered that he'd likely be there.

Shit, why hadn't I thought of that before?

There was a lot of tension between me and Eren. As far as I knew Jean's friend group, or my old friend group shared the same friends as Eren.

Wait would they still invite him knowing what happened? Did they even care at all about how I felt?

I saw myself getting angry at Jean for even mentioning it to me now. I knew very likely that Eren was going to be there, and so did Jean. So why the hell would Jean invite me in the first place unless he was looking for trouble. Jean had seen me fight Eren and countless others before, so why was he acting as if he couldn't care less? I wasn't going to text Jean and bother him about the subject, it wasn't his fault that two of his friends wanted to kill one another.

Time passed, and I just continued to play on my phone. I was starting to grow hungry, and had decided to go get some food. As selfish as it was, I never really bothered to ask anyone else if they were hungry I'd usually just leave and go get my own food; so that's exactly what I was doing now. I exited the house and got into my car. I didn't really feel like eating fast food for the 4th time this week. I decided on a wing spot, for some reason I had this weird obsession with chicken wings. I drive to the spot, taking notice that it wasn't that busy, so I could probably be in and out in no time.

I was wrong yet again. Very wrong.

I entered the shop, it was a small family owned business. They had some pretty good food, and were usually fast. The only downside to this place was the fact that it was a dine-in restaurant and not to go. I looked around scanning the tables, for whatever reason. Then my eyes landed on a familiar figure.

Jean