Hopeless Situation

Chapter 16

A Little Late?

It was the big day, the wedding, and Sophie was still here in bed with her sweatpants and tank top on. 5:45 on a Saterday, way to early for her likings, but still Sophie was more awake than she'd ever been in her entire life.

It took a while for Sophie to actually get out of bed. She just lay there, thinking of every possible issue that came over her mind; famine, child poverty, civil wars, and Nathan walking down the isle alone. It really bothered her for some odd reason. It bothered her more than it should have. She couldnt bare seeing him, sulking, striding awkwardly down the isle because she had left him to solve everything on his own. It even came to a point when Sophie was talking to herself, telling herself that it wasn't her problem anymore and that she should just forget about it. She tossed and turned in bed every two minutes because of this pain that rose in her stomach. For a split second she was terrified she was dying. Dying because of karma, but later she realized it was the pain of leaving him, betraying Marie, ditching halfway before the story ends.

Finally, at 9:30, she got up. She walked to the bathroom, ready to rinse herself from these thoughts. Sophie undressed herself and stood under the shower letting the water drum against her scalp. She reached for the shampoo, the purple one and remembered Marie's strawberry kind. The one she had used the time she stayed in their estate. After rinsing her hair thoroughly, adding the additional products like soap and conditioner, she wrapped herself around in a towel. It was at that moment, the moment when she walked out of the bedroom half naked that she wished Nathan was there. It was a weird thought and feeling. Her heart beat against her chest and her mind raced to that day, that Deja Vu moment, when he was there standing at the far corner of the room with his back towards her, just as she'd told him to do. Sophie felt weak. She held onto the rim of the doorway to keep her balance. The other thing she remembered was the falling, her on him...

Sophie closed her eyes. Everything around her reminded her of him. She could feel the thumping of her heart, she had no control over it. She quickly grabbed her clothes from her drawer, anything she could find, and ran in to the washroom scared that someone would hear the untold words she worked so hard on hiding.

For some reason when she got out to eat breakfast, she remembered his face. She missed the way that he used to sleekly brush his hand through his hair. Before she'd find it arrogant and cocky, as it came out to her as tryna look cool, but at that very moment when she sat down with her bowl of cereal she couldn't help but think it was attractive.

Lifting her spoon up to her mouth and missing by a mile, Sophie ended up spilling it on her shirt. Suddenly startled by the milk on her blouse, she jumped up from her chair spilling the bowl all over the table as well. Her mind was absolutely not working today.

"Shit!" Sophie ran for the cloth in the kitchen and began to clean up hurriedly. "Damn it! I'm such a klutz..." and for some reason she heard a reply. From behind her, a deep manly voice said mockingly "yeah Sophie, stop being such a kid." Her heart skipped a beat. As she slowly turned around to see who was there, hoping on the inside that it was him, she had to be let down with disappointment to find absolutely no one. She was imagining things and out of all things, it was him.

While she wiped the tiles, she thought to herself why she was feeling all of this all of a sudden. It was awkward and unexpected. Then when she was done she came to conclusion. Squeezing the milk out of the cloth and washing it thoroughly she realized that she had the symptoms of love. Only that it wasn't. She only thought she was in love because she was guilty to the point where she felt super bad for him. Nathan was like a lost, hurt puppy. You feel so incredibly bad for it that you begin to believe that you should keep it and love it and nurture it back to health.