A Love Without Time (Remus Lupin)

Twenty-Nine.

A/N: This chapter does go through the timeline of a year pretty quickly.

-Remus-
   
Married.

She's getting married.

She's getting married to Matt Mckinnon.
   
Someone come fucking kill me.
   
They invited the entire order, and I have decided that I don't want to go. I don't think that I will be missed. With Matt's money it will certainly be a lavish celebration, something I would never be able to give her. Sirius said she didn't want to spend a lot of time engaged, so she's planning overtime day in and out when she's not taking care of the twins.
   
I know that I sound bitter, and to be honest I will admit that I am. If I had just been honest with her from the start, she'd probably still be mine. But that's beside the point now. I'm jealous. He's giving her the life I could never, and that's what makes me so jealous.
   
Well she's getting what she deserves, honestly. Sirius says she is happy, so I guess that's all that matters. She told me to leave her alone, and I have. I just wish I was as happy as she was sometimes. That would make things a whole lot easier.
   
It took them five months to plan their wedding, and on the night of their wedding, I decided to stay home and drink until I fell asleep. I regretted it when I woke up the next day. Sirius came over the next day and told me all about it, how it was small, just family and the Order and some of Matt's teammates, that was it.
   
But then we got to the reason he was here. Regulus Black was dead. He got cold feet and tried to leave the Death Eaters and they killed him for it. And now Sirius is hellbent on trying to figure out who the spy in the order is. We've already lost Caradoc Dearborn, Edgar Bones, and Benjy Fenwick. Emmeline Vance is getting worried that she might be next, honestly I think we're all worried we might be next. I certainly was, with my status as a werewolf and all I could definitely be a target.
   
In other, better news, Lily gave birth to a baby boy on July 31st that she and James called Harry, and Alice Longbottom also had a boy on July 30th, that she and Frank called Neville and then Ellie got married in August. But then it got dark again quickly. In September, another death happened. Two deaths, actually. Fabian and Gideon Prewett. They fought off five Death Eaters just the two of them, they were strong to the very end, but they unfortunately weren't enough.

-Ellie-
   
Fabian and Gideon's funeral was so heartbreaking. I had to be the one to break the news to Molly, and it broke my heart to do so. This was one of the first times that Bradley and Lyanna were ever out of the house. Normally I don't leave, but this time I had to. Molly was my friend, and I needed to be there for her.
   
Fred and George were too young to understand what was going on, so when they saw me they got very excited. They both ran up to me and I gave them big hugs. I saw Molly standing with baby Ron on her hip and Arthur was next to her, his hand on her shoulder.
   
Molly greeted us as warmly as she could, but I could tell she was having a hard time. They were the only family she had left. She has Arthur's family, but her family is gone. I couldn't imagine what that must be like. I hugged Molly tight, and she hugged me back. She was definitely holding back tears. I could tell.
   
Molly had met the entire order at my wedding, everyone except for Remus. He was here today, and he even approached Molly and gave her condolences, she thanked him and he walked off to go find Sirius, James, and Peter.
   
I didn't like that we were all in the same place at the same time. The spy was obviously here, which meant the person responsible for this death was here. It made me sick to think about. Whoever they were, they were good at what they were doing, that was for sure.
   
I tried to shake off the feeling, but I couldn't. Sirius still thinks it might be Remus, and I still think that Remus wouldn't do that, but at this point you never know honestly. I bet anything that Remus might even think it's Sirius. He's the only one that makes sense, but that's also why I don't think that it's Sirius, because it would be too obvious.
   
I have no idea who it was, honestly.
   
But right now I had to be there for my friend while she said goodbye to her brothers. It made me want to go hug my brother and tell him that I loved him. He and I weren't the closest growing up, but as we've gotten older we've become closer. And after he was there when I had my twins, we were now the best of friends. I even asked him to be Lyanna's Godfather, Marlene is her Godmother. Bradley's Godparents are James and Dorcas.
   
After the funeral, I kept staying home with my babies. I was in total fear of leaving the house. I corresponded with Molly, and we wrote to each other all the time. I had to check in and make sure she was doing okay.
   
It was January, 1981, when there was yet another Death in the Order of the Phoenix. Sirius popped in unannounced and it terrified me. He assured me I was safe and then we sat at the kitchen table and he told me the news.
   
"There's no easy way to say this," he said, his voice solem, "There's been another death."
   
"Who was it this time?" I asked, ready for the news.
   
"It was Dorcas."
   
He kept talking but my ears started ringing so I didn't hear anything. Dorcas. My best mate. Maid of honor at my wedding. The Godmother of my son. She was dead. She couldn't be. There was no way. There was some mistake. She wasn't dead.
   
"What?" I asked after Sirius finished talking.
   
I didn't even realize that Matt had taken my hand underneath the table.
   
Sirius sighed, "I'm so sorry, Ellie, I know she was your best mate."
   
"What happened to her?" I asked, feeling dazed. I'm sure he already told us what happened, but I was just in shock when he did.
   
"Voldemort personally killed her himself. We think she must have gotten a lead about who the spy was that she didn't tell anyone about and decided to go in herself. Whoever they are took her to him to have her killed."
   
My heart was pounding, and my throat felt dry. My eyes, however, were streaming out the tears. I wiped them away with my free hand. I couldn't believe that she was gone.
   
I was suddenly filled with burning rage. "We need to find out who this spy is and we need to put them in Azkaban for the rest of their life. Otherwise I will kill them myself. They've gone too far."
   
I stood up and walked off dramatically. I headed to the bedroom, where I began to cry so hard into my hands. A moment later, I felt a pair of arms around me, I knew it was Matt. He held me while I cried. And I cried for so long I didn't even keep track of how long it was, and my husband held me the entire time.
   
I woke the next day exhausted like I didn't even get any sleep even though I slept like a rock all night long. I loved Dorcas so much, I am so torn up that she's gone. Matt helped by taking care of Bradley and Lyanna all day for me. I didn't have to lift a finger.
   
After her funeral, the days began to melt together. When my twins turned a year old in mid March, we didn't have a party or anything but some family did come over and we celebrated together. Everything seemed like it was going back to normal.
   
It only lasted for a moment.
   
It was early July when tragedy struck my family. Matt was meeting up with his family, and he wanted to take the twins with him but I refused, putting my foot down, telling him that if his family wanted to see the twins that they could come here. He backed down when he realized I wouldn't.
   
I woke up that morning and Matt wasn't next to me. He didn't tell me he planned on staying the night, but I guess he did. When I went to check on the twins, I saw Sirius was standing in  their nursery, and he was holding Bradley.
   
"Sirius," I gasped, surprised to see him.
   
"Sorry. I heard him crying and I figured I'd let you sleep a little longer. I, um, I come with bad news."
   
"Well, can we wait for Matt? He hasn't come back yet."
   
"That's actually what I need to tell you," he says and suddenly his eyes were lined with tears.
   
"He's..." I begin and then I trail off. I gulped, not wanting to say it out loud, "He's not coming home, is he?"
   
He put Bradley back into his crib and then he looked at me. "I'm sorry."
   
I started crying hard then, Sirius hugged me tight. I could tell he was crying too. I cried for a good, long moment and then I stopped, pulling myself together. "What happened to him?"
   
"The entire family was ambushed," he says, "They're all gone."
   
"So Marlene..." I start but trail off again.
   
"She's gone, too," Sirius says. It looked like it was very hard for him to say.
   
"Oh Sirius. I'm so sorry," I say and then we hug again.
   
The funeral was about a week later. Sirius helped me move back in with my mum. It distracted him, and it distracted me, too. On the day of the funeral, I wasn't worried about an ambush, but I didn't like that we were all together again.
   
I was surprised by Remus coming. I know that he was close with Marlene, but he hated Matt. I figured he'd sit this one out like he did our wedding. I was glad that I was wrong. He walked up to me, and he said, "I'm so sorry for your loss, Ellie. Really, I can't imagine what you're going through."
   
I hugged him tightly. It was just a reflex. He held me back and ran a hand on my back. It was nice to be hugged by him again, it has been so long I forgot what it was like. I thanked him when I let go of him and he walked off to our friends.
   
Molly and her family arrived after that. I hugged them all so tight. George wanted to sit with me during the service, and I told Molly that it was okay with me if she didn't mind. But if George got to Fred wanted to as well so I sat with both of the twins and Molly's as well.
   
At the end of the service I was in tears again. George looked at me and said, "Ellie," and I wiped my eyes and looked down at him.
   
"Yes sweetie?"
   
"Are you sad?" He asked.
   
I nodded my head, "Yes, baby, I am very sad today." He stood up in his seat so he was tall enough to wrap his little arms around my neck, hugging tight. I hugged him back. "Thank you so much, Georgie."
   
He held onto me for a moment and then he let go again, "All better?" He asked.
   
"Yes," I said and I cupped his adorable face in my hand, "All better. Thank you, darling."
   
"I love you, Ellie." said Fred as he then too threw his little arms around my neck. I hugged him back, giving him a good squeeze.
   
"I love you, too, Freddie," I told him as I hugged him back.

_____________________
Here's part 29!

It ended a little sad there, I know.

But we all knows what happens to the Potters on Halloween so prepare for that next.

I know, I know. It's going to be dark here for a moment.

-Emily Winchester.