Moving To Silence

Twelve. After Sleepovers

"There's no stopping those feelings now Nel, we both know it and I am glad you can admit it" Amalie smiles through my laptop screen, our weekly facetime well underway, even though I text her my responses we still adore being able to see one another.

"Well, there needs to be a stop to them"

"What's so bad about liking him? You said he was a good guy"

"He is a good guy!!!"

"Then I don't see a problem, crushes are good and healthy"

"Do I really need to explain why I don't want to have a crush on him?"

"Nope, and do I really need to explain why Kath and I think it is nothing but amazing?"

"Yes, because go with it, makes no sense"

"It does make sense, it means that instead of icing him out and focusing on negatives, you know won't happen with him... like I know you have been trying and failing to do" I can hear her scolding me without looking up at my screen, Strom hasn't let me be a recluse these past couple of days. "Look Nel, all I am saying is that you aren't required to act on your feelings but them being there is a good thing, I thought you wanted to feel normal?"

"I do!!"

"Then let yourself do it, or at least try and stop worrying about the other four that invaded your privacy"

"I am scared they'll find more"

"Then I will come kill them all!"

"You'd be here"

"I am still serious about wanting to transfer, even if only for senior year, doing the rest of my degree with you sounds godly"

"How is it all?"

"Hard, and then harder, some days I wonder if my head might explode, but I did, maybe meet someone" She admits shyly, and I clap my hands and bounce up and down on my bed.

"SPILL NOW"

"He is in my legal ethics class and we decided to partner for the essay and then, I may or may not have ended up in his bed"

"Amalie Dune, you did not!!!!"

"Oh, I did" She winks, hiding her face with her hands and then shaking her braids, laced with moss green in front of them.

"You dirty little slut"

"What can I say, I like to live on the wild side" She replies, muffled by her hands before dropping them and flopping back onto her bed, in a fit of giggles.

"I live vicariously through you"

"One day you won't have too because you will be having fun too and realising the other side of life isn't as scary as it seems right now"

"A, we don't know that"

"I know it. You can never say never, without first trying to be braver and a good place to start is Storm" The knock at my door saves me from another Amalie lecture that only ever comes from her heart, I don't tell her I secretly love them.

"BRB *Pizza Emoji*"

I race to the door, hoping it'll be my food because I am about five minutes away from starvation... and I guess it is my food. Although there is a very stressed Strom holding it.

"It's official, I am going to fail!" He groans, waltzing in without an invitation and throwing his back onto my bed, while I grab a plate for my slices.