'Till forever h.s.

It's not like I care (25)

Guyssss, I posted the description of a new fic called 'Cherries & cigars' go check it out!

You know that feeling of despise? Not hate but a close second. That feeling that makes your bones shatter and your head spin. Your heartbeat so loud for all the wrong reasons, sweat trickling your forehead and agony from the lump in your throat is starting to feel more like a dagger to your heart.

Anger, I suppose, works quite like drugs at some point. It's addicting. It becomes a part of your daily life, a 'must have' for you to go on with your week. And anger, I suppose, is just as toxic. It kills you slowly from the inside out, day by day, piece by piece until it has consumed your whole being and you are nothing but it.

Anger is sadness in fight-mode. And at a point or another, getting angry is just another bad habit.

Harry was angry.

Harry's POV

Adrenaline still shooting up my veins as molten rage rolled down my forehead in form of sweat. Gripping my hair tightly as my eyes flickered between the door and the elevator in loss of what to do.

I don't even know why I'm reacting like this but something about what happened today really triggered me and I can't put my finger on why. My stomach twisted in a mix of fury and sadness which just left me more confused. She was laughing and speaking nonsense like it was the most perfectly normal thing in the world but she was high, I don't know if this is frequent but it has got to stop.

My fists clench by my side as I take deep breaths to try and calm down. This is just her way of coping I guess but does she have any idea how badly this could end? She's so fucking clueless.

And yeah maybe the way I reacted was unnecessarily harsh but I was just trying to help and then Liam- Ugh I hate that motherfucker! Why is he always so nosey? "Let her go" Go fucking where? She was high off her mind!

What I should have done was knock some sense into Liam and then put Davina to bed so she would come to her senses. She was so out of it it's not even funny.

Why am I even thinking about this still? If she wants to get high then I should let her. I don't care and as far as I know this isn't the first time.

I wouldn't put it past her to be high that day at the kitchen. It's not like I'm judging quite frankly, she is indeed in a very shitty situation but she needs to understand drugs aren't the right choice at any point, believe me I know. I don't wish that for anyone, especially not someone like her.

Pacing back and forth in the hallway in front of our apartment door I mentally debate in how to proceed. I've been out for the whole evening so they're hopefully all asleep by now but I still feel like I should do something. Maybe apologise.

No we don't do that here.

It's not that I care honestly. It just feels a bit off to let it go without addressing the situation ever again. Yeah that's it, I'm doing this for the whole entire purpose of not feeling a bit guilty and coming out as a complete douchebag.

Yeah I'm doing this for me. I'm not so angry anymore.

I slowly pull out my card to unlock the front door, feeling anxiety kick in as I give myself a small pep talk in the middle of the dark hallway. We opted for cards instead of keys for safety reasons, that way no one that wasn't allowed could get in and no one would leave unless they were supposed to.

I swipe my card across the small lock until the flashing green light lets me know it's open, gripping the cold handle and pushing it down. But as I'm trying to enter through it, a weight of some kind keeps me from entering the apartment.