Without Me (Eminem x Female!Reader Fanfic)

Ch. 12

~Ch. 12~

(Em's POV)

~3 Months Later~
(Y/n) is being a real bitch now. 3 months and she's still keeping something from me. Every time I come home in her room, I see her cover her arm or hide something behind her back. Being the lovesick idiot, I realized I try to find out what the hell's going on. But she keeps denying that anything's wrong when I ask. Frustrating me even more. I kept my cool. But now I'm done. I walk into her arm one Saturday morning when she's still asleep and slowly peek at her arms, eyes widening to saucers. What could a perfect girl like her have that could make her self harm? Her scars were still forming next to fresh new cuts. I'm a dumbass. Fucking idiot. I barged into her own secrets and she doesn't even fucking know it. No wonder she kept it from me. She'll hate me once she finds out. Better to shut up about it then mention it today. It'd be the worst topic to bring up while hanging at the movies today.

~After movies~

Leaving the theatre, I noted (y/n) consistently pulling her jacket sleeve down to hide the cuts. It sucks knowing it already, but I pretended not to notice. Cause she's going to hate me even more if I keep asking even if I knew.

"Park?" She asked snapping me out of my thoughts.

"Yeah sure. Park. Let's go." I said hesitantly.

She looked at me strangely, "You okay, Em?"

"Yeah fine." Fucking lier I am.

~Park~

We sat at the bench and talked for the rest of our date-i guess you would call it.

"Wha'd you think of the movie?" She asked.

"Okay," I said, "though Matrix is better."

"You like Matrix?" She looked at me weirdly

"Bitch something wrong with it being my all-time favorite?"

She laughed, and said, "Fine I'll shut up."

I smiled, "Better do that." (Y/n) looked so happy. So fucking happy. But I still see it's just a mask. She hid this pain from me for a reason and yet I forced myself to find out what's wrong because I'm a stubborn as fuck dumbass in love with this perfect girl next to me! I just lost any chance with her once I saw her cuts. You are a stupid muthafucker Marshall Bruce Mathers III.

She's busy texting one of her friends as I'm lost in thoughts. "Ay! no texting while hanging out with Marshall!"

I reached for her phone to see who she's texting but she puts her phone out of my reach. I say,

"Give me your phone (y/n)."

"Fuck no."

"Give it to me right now, bitch."

"No," she stuck her tongue out at me.

"You asked for the hard way."

I grabbed her phone quickly toppling over her but then retreated once I had it. She attempted to reach for it but I pushed her back. She was texting her sister. About me. I raised an eyebrow at her smirking. She glared at me while blushing.

"Hm, texting Emily about me. Hmm so you think I'm sexy?" I said proudly.

"I didn't say your name. I said a guy I'm hanging with. That could be any guy to her."

"But I am the guy you're hanging with. And to realize you think I'm hot." I smirked wider.

"God, I knew saying that would inflate your ego." She grunted, "now give my phone back."

Out of joke, I put her phone down my pants near my balls, dilating her eyes to golf ball size.

I snickered, "Come and take it. I dare you."

"MARSHALL BRUCE MATHERS III!" She screamed.

"Hey bitch calm down. Papparazzi could probably hear you."

"You're an ass! Fucking really?!" She said arms crossed.

I laughed.

~Home~
I saw (y/n) carry her phone with latex gloves on. I laughed at the disgusted face she made. But then remembered the mask she was wearing hiding her true pain as I saw the long sleeve she wore. The thoughts of it were churning inside me constantly. And I couldn't hold it in myself anymore. It was too much to keep inside bottled up. Besides it was right to tell her the truth.

Biting my lip in hesitation, I say, "Hey...(y/n)...I need to talk to you."

She stopped sanitizing her phone and looked up at me. "Sure."

We sat down on the couch and I said first, "Listen I can't keep anything from you cause I'll never forgive myself for keeping something like what I'm about to say."

Her eyes showed concern, "Wh-what is it, Em?"

"I..." hesitating, I take a large breath, "I saw your cuts this morning..."

Her eyes looked away and then began watering. Hating myself, I said something to hurriedly stop the tears, "I know You'll hate me so if you really want to move out for doing it-"

"No it's not Marshall. It's not that," she said as a tear rolled down her cheek. The mask was off. Her true pain was revealed.

My chest twinging in pain and my desire to comfort her increasing, I ask, "What is it?"

"My life...Shit won't stop happening in my family and I can't do shit about it...my sister's boyfriend is probably beating her right now, dad's behind bars, mom's stuck in rehab, I'm grabbing cash that ain't enough...all this is fucking my life up and I can't do anything to fix it and no one else gives a fucking damn!"

(Y/n) completely broke down. This wasn't the girl I saw before this conversation. But this isn't (y/n) at the moment either. That mask she wore wasn't her truly because it was fake happiness to hide her depression. I had to bring her back to herself. My heart's shattering little by little just seeing her like this. She thinks no one gives a damn? I would like to prove her wrong. I hugged her too myself where I let her cry on my shoulder. I felt tear stains through my thin shirt. I stroked her hair and rubbed her back, doing any sort of comforting. She was practically balling her eyes out, my heart chipped a little more at the sound of it. Lifting her chin to look at me, I rubbed my thumb to wipe her tears. With that, I kissed her. She made an immediate response with a kiss back. Our lips rolled against each other, a constant battle of dominance and strong heat exchange with sweet bliss. She had her arms around my neck and I had my hand lost in her (h/c) hair. She's mine. All mine. I had everything about her. She gave up her heart to me even after I told her I did something I shouldn't have. I was going to keep her heart and love, treat it like gold. Cause I fucking loved her. Her heart was mine and I had to keep it. Wow, Is this actually going through my head. I never realized how much I loved her. I laughed at myself in my head. I didn't care if I was lovesick or not, I had her and she had me.