Party Poison

Chapter 25

Gerard/Party's P.O.V
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​I headed downstairs. Everyone had gone to bed. I intended going back to my room. My basement room. I hear a noise behind me but ignore it as I open the basement door. I close my eyes and take a breath. Then open my eyes and head down the stairs. I stop on the bottom step and stare at the floor. I can still see mum's body laying there after I shot her. A tear rolls down my cheek as I sit down on the step. I stay there for about half an hour. Fully aware someone was watching me. Then I stood up. I headed for my desk, jumping over where my mum's body was. I stared at my drawings on the wall. Drawings of Mikey, Ray, Bob, Mum, Dad and Frank. I pulled off a drawing of Dad. I stared at it for a while. I really miss him. I take down a drawing of mum. I really miss her too. Then I look at the drawing of Frank. Tears start to roll down my cheeks. He's too good for me anyway. I'm fucking useless. I'm a waste of atoms. I lose it. I rip every drawing off the wall and shred the one of Frank.
​"You don't deserve love." I told myself. "You don't deserve anything. Your a useless fucking freak." I drop the shredded paper and look in the full length mirror. "Look at you." I say to the reflection in disgust. "Why would anyone love....that?" I asked as I gestured to my mirrored image. "Your fucking disgusting."
​"No." Frank said as he approached me from behind. "Your amazing." He told me, looking at my face in the mirror. "Your handsome, sexy. You have a really sexy butt. Your loving and caring. Your everything I could ever want. You are the most useful person I've ever known. You've been a brother to us all. A dad to Mikey. And a great boyfriend to me."
​I scoffed at that. "You mean a cheating boyfriend." I snapped as I spun around. "I don't even blame you. I'm nothing. I'm not worth it."
​Frank grabbed my shoulders. "You are not nothing. You are worth everything." He said, gently. "I'm a idiot. I had the best thing ever and I blew it because I was jealous. I just didn't want to share you. I love you so much it hurts. I'm sorry. Please forgive me. Please be my boyfriend again." Tears were flowing down his cheeks.
​I stared at him. Was he even here? Or is it my stupid mind imagining him because it knows no one will ever love me? I ran all my fingers through my hair and dropped to the ground. "Your not real." I said closing my eyes. "Not real."
​Frank knelt infront of me. "I am real." He stated. Then he dragged me into his arms and kissed me.
​I froze. This feels real. It can't be my imagination. What the fuck is wrong with me? I pulled away and looked into his eyes. "Frank?" I whispered.
​He smiled. "Yes, baby." He said. "It's me."​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​