[]Find Hope In The Hopeless💛

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TW: Panic Attacks

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TW: Panic Attacks

Song To Listen To When reading- Anyone by justin bieber

Y/n's Pov-

I waited patiently for JJ at our spot at the beach. He texted me and told me he would be be here in 15 minutes. that was 45 minutes ago. I've started getting worried. Did something happen at work? Did he and his dad fight? Did he wreck his bike and get hurt? I pushed those thoughts away and stared out at the ocean.

I heard the roar of his bike behind me in the parking spaces. I smiled to myself and turned around only to be met with an upset JJ. He was clearly stressed about something. He looked up from the ground as he walked. He spotted me and smiled. "Hey you ok" i asked as he plopped down beside me. He looked from me to the water. "uh yeah i'm uh i'm fine" he hesitated before he said it. "J what's wro-" "nothing i'm fine" he snapped at me. I looked down at my legs and fiddled with my fingers. "I'm sorry can we just... can we just lay down and you talk and i'll listen" he said as he leaned his head on my shoulder. i nodded and laid down on the blanket. he threw his arm around my waist and kept his head my shoulder. I talked about my day, how i feel about the quickly approaching school year, how i was stressed about the summer reading, and how i've convinced my parents about the tattoos and piercings i want.

"JJ i think we should get going it's already 9:40" i said as i sat up, bringing him with me. "Yeah you're right" he said after he quickly nodded. I picked up my phone and called my mom. "What are yo-" i held my hand up to silence him. "Hey mom can...ok mom can JJ spend the night...yep i know...we won't...love you too" i ended the call. "You didn't have to" he mumbled. "I know. but i wanted to and i know you better than you think. i can tell you don't want to be alone right now" i said as i caressed his cheek with my thumb. He quickly melted into my touch. We folded up the blanket and hopped on his bike. I laid my head on his shoulder and patiently waited till we got home.

We pulled up and went in to my house. I kicked my shoes off in my room and looked over to JJ as he sat on my bed, rubbing his hands up and down his thighs. His breathing was speeding up and getting caught in his chest. "JJ" i spoke softly. His eyes shot up to look at me. He had panic written all over his face. His eyes darted around my room and finally focused on the floor. I walked over to him and crouched in front of him. "J? I need you to listen to me ok bub. Breathe in and out. Copy my breathing" i said calmly and rubbed his bicep. He nodded and tried but failed.

It wasn't working. I quickly thought of other things. "Ok JJ we're gonna count down from 100 by three together. ok" i said and he nodded his head. "100...97...94...91...88...85...82...79...76...73... 70...67...64...61" we counted in unison for about ten seconds before he couldn't focus on it anymore and it wasn't working. "I want you to wiggle your fingers and keep counting until you get to forty. once you get to forty tell me everything that makes you happy" i spoke as i wiped a couple tears that made their way down his face. "58...55...52...49...46...43...40" he counted on his own. "Good job baby now tell me everything that makes you happy" i said. His breathing was slowing down. But he was still crying. I climbed up on my bed and wrapped my legs around his waist and hugged him as i sat in his lap and his head was on my shoulder.

"The pogues. T-They make me happy. S-Surfing makes me so h-happy. A-And you make me happy. You make really r-really happy" he said as a sob came out of his mouth towards the end. He sat there and cried into my shoulder for i don't know how long. "Let's get ready for bed yeah" i said as i pulled him up and over to my closet. I found some black sweatpants of his. I handed the to him. I changed into a red hoodie that was his as he sat  by the window and looked out at figure eight.

I climbed into bed and watched him(not in a creepy way) as he pulled off his shoes, his shirts, pants, and socks and change into the the sweatpants(again not in a creepy way). He turned my light off and turned my ceiling fan on. I plugged in both of our phones. Finally he crawled in with me. He laid his head on my chest and wrapped his arms around me. "Thank you y/n. for helping me and for being there for me. i don't deserve you" he mumbled from my chest. "i'll always be here J. whenever you need me. i love you so much JJ. you deserve the world. you don't deserve what you have because you should have better" i said as i played with his hair. "Well i have you and that's more than enough for me" he said as he ran his finger tips up and down my bare leg. "Goodnight bub. i love you" i whispered. "i love you too" he replied. And with that, i fell into a peaceful sleep knowing that my JJ was ok.

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1k words
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I always see ones where y/n has a panic attack but never where JJ has one
imo this is shit so i apologize. lmk what you all think. i love you're feedback.
ALSO HOLY SHIT WE HIT 51K READS!! TYSM I LOVE YOU ALL
-abby🍒

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