Out of My Control [bxb]

Chapter 27

We cleaned up our indoor picnic and put the leftovers in the fridge. Now, Grayson and I are continuing New Moon. We're snuggled in bed together; him leaning against the headboard and me leaning on him watching the movie from his laptop.

Even though he insisted on watching the second Twilight, Grayson seems more interested in me than the movie.

His hands are roaming my body in a soft, almost teasing, way. Grayson's hand moves to my thigh. He slowly grazes it up towards my crotch then back down in the Most. Sexual. Way. Possible!

My body is heating up and heart begins to beat faster. But I ignore him. I want to see what he'll do next to get my attention.

Grayson buries his face in the crook of my neck and I instinctively tilt my head to the side for him. His tongue swipes below my ear. My breathing becomes shallow, but I still don't give in. He kisses my neck. Grayson pulls the collar of my shirt to the side and places his lips on my shoulder. Fuck, I want to give in.

But I hold off. "Look at me," he demands in a husky voice. I do as told and face him, we're an inch apart. His striking blue eyes are stuck on my lips, "You wanna know what I want to do to you right now?"

I'm paralyzed by his touch, I can't form words, so I nod instead.

Grayson's eyes move to mine. His hand moving to my crotch and rubs my hard on through my jeans as he tells me, "I want your naked body against mine and to make you feel things you've never experienced before." His voice is low and fuck me, if it isn't the hottest sentence he's ever spoken. "If you'll let me," he adds.

I nod vigorously and find my words, "please, yes," I beg, but I don't care. I need his body on mine. Those two words barely fall past my tongue before his hands are on my face and his mouth is on mine. "Mmm," comes from me. Our kiss is lustful and quick and are hands our touching every part of each other's body.

Grayson shuts his laptop, drops a pillow on the ground, then slides his laptop off the bed so it lands on the pillow instead of the hard ground.

I pull back from our heated kiss, "Okay, that was impressive," I refer to the laptop drop, stupidly interrupting us.

My boyfriend chuckles then grabs the back of my neck to rope me into another kiss. His tongue is in my mouth while his hand returns to rubbing my member. I moan against his lips. My hands grip the hem of his shirt and lifts up. We break away for a second so I can remove his shirt.

Grayson takes my shirt off quickly after and leans back to admire my body.

That's when the photos of his ex pop up in my mind.

His ex's body was better than mine, I don't even compare! What does Grayson see in me? It definitely can't be my looks after dating someone like that guy from the pictures.

I look away from Grayson, not being able to watch him look at my bare chest. He lays me down on the bed and hovers over me. I barely feel his lips on my neck because my whole body goes numb.

Oh God, I bet his ex boyfriend's dick is bigger than mine! Did they have sex? Who am I kidding, of course they did, I'm not Grayson's first.

Fuck, why are all these insecurities hitting me now?

Grayson must not be aware of my sudden mood shift as he shifts lower and begins kissing my chest. His fingers slip underneath the waistband of my boxers teasingly.

I know what comes next, he'll take my pants then underwear off. I don't care that he's seen me without clothes before, this time feels different. This time, Grayson won't like what he sees, I'm sure of it!!