YOU FIRST🌹:1

Messed Up

First, I take in a deep breath to calm the burning sensation in my throat. The next thing, I fake  a smile at Ivan and I just nod my head, pretending this is fine.

"That's uh... cool. Congratulations." Who the heck am I kidding?! "I'm... happy for you," I say with a sigh. I look at Ivan, "can we... talk outside?"

"Right now?"

I nod. "Yes, right now." I walk toward the door and step out of the room. I wait for him to come out and I hear them whispering among themselves. He comes out of the room and closes the door. I grab on the shirt he's wearing and pull him away with me to his room. I close the door with a loud bang and lock the door. "What the fuck, Ivan!" I roar at him.

"You wanted me to stop fucking around."

"And the person you chose to settle down with is my best friend?! What is wrong with you? Are you sick in the head or something? Do you know how this makes me feel?"

"How does this make you feel, Kara? You and I were never in a relationship. I made that clear to you. I told you I wasn't into you!"

"I fucking sucked your dick last night, Roy! You could've told me about it. Why do you always hurt me when all I've ever done since I met you is try to be close to you?" I am feeling infuriated and humiliated. "This is why she's been acting that way to me. I should've known you were fucking her when you couldn't even look at me in front of her. You spent the night with her after the show and you made me believe it would be weird even to touch her."

"I don't want to talk about this."

I sniff and shake my head at him. "Me neither. I told you I'd support whatever decision you make... as your friend. I really wish you and her work out." I smile at him and walk to the door.

I unlock the door and step out of the room. I walk to the kitchen, seeing no one around and I put my head on the table. I sob quietly for minutes and the pain doesn't stop. How am I going to face Myra now? I've been sucking her boyfriend's dick. What happened between her and Claude? Did she cheat on Claude with Ivan? Not that I would be surprised, Ivan is also good-looking.

"What is wrong with me?" I take my head up and wipe my tears. I get up from the chair and prepare breakfast to make up with Myra. I don't want to get on her bad side. I make oatmeal and eggs for her because I know she likes them.

I serve the food on the tray and send it to the room. Myra's dressing up and putting on lip-gloss. I put the tray of food on the study desk and turn to her with a smile. "Hey, I made breakfast,"

"What were you and Ivan talking about?" She turns to me and smacks her lips together to smudge the lip-gloss.

"Uh, I was telling him not to hurt you." I lie and she smirks at me. "Are you and... Claude over?"

"Would I be dating Ivan if were still together?" She smirks again.

"Myra, I don't want us to argue..."