thoughts

57

was it the tone of my voice?

even though we parted our ways weeks ago I still find myself wondering how you managed to put me in such a state of pain that I left you even after promising that I was never going to leave you and if we parted ways it was gonna be you who left me. still to this day do I miss the person that you used to be. i used to be so head over heels in love with you and something changed within you and I don't know what it is. was it the tone of my voice? was of the people I was hanging around? was it because I cut my hair? The constant battle between my mind thinking I never wanna see you again on the other side just wants to know what I ever did so wrong for you to treat me that way. sometimes I still find old videos on my phone that I forgot to delete of us giggling  and laughing together and it just doesn't make any sense how things change so quickly. maybe it was because of the drugs that you were taking but it doesn't make any sense that any amount of milligram in a pill could fuck you up so badly that you could lose the love from someone that you promised you would never leave or hurt. you know at one point we planned on living together after high school and getting married having our own family planning with our house and what it would look like and now we're strangers. how did we go from so deeply in love to not being able to talk to each other and see each other's faces again without being hurt? what did I ever do to you? was it the tone of my voice?