I Wan't to Change~(ChihiroxMondo)

Chapter 21~My Killing Game Crush.

Mondo's POV:

I sigh some to myself. I can't believe I actually opened up to Chihiro...it...felt nice...~ Getting everything off my chest...~ Of course there's some other stuff that I wanted to tell him, but...it mainly involves the killing game and...some of it is kinda embarrassing. Really I should find out what he's hiding...it must involve whatever Mukuro talked to him about...I notice Chihiro blushing, making me laugh some, "What's up...?" I ask curiously, making him look up at me.

"Ah...I'm just...a little embarrassed is all..." Chihiro says, confusing me some. "Why...? It's not because of this is it...?" I ask as I hold up our hands, making him blush more, "We can let go if y-" "N-No! It's okay...~" he says, interrupting me, "I-I...don't mind...~" Chihiro smiles a little, making me blush some. He...doesn't want to...? I mean he instigated it, so I guess it makes since, but it's still kinda awkward...

Chihiro clears his throat and tries to change the subject, "So...you mentioned before we sat down that the reason you joined Hope's Peak was because you didn't want to lose your group." He says, making me look down some. "Yea...despite everything I went through I'm still their leader...they're still a part of my life." I say, sighing some before I continue talking, "Though...before going I started thinking about what would happen to the group after we all graduated...I knew that we would go our separate ways, but the others knew what they wanted to do while...I didn't."

Chihiro saddens some, "Did you ever figure it out...?" He asks, making me laugh some. "Yea I did, but you might laugh at me when I tell you what it is..." I say, making him giggle some. "No I wouldn't! What would you want to do~?" Chihiro asks as he scoots a little closer. I blush a little when he does, rubbing the back of my neck, "I Ah...thought a carpenter would work, since...I wanted to start making things instead of...y'know...breaking them..." I say, making him smile some. "I think it sounds like a good idea~" he says, making me smile some. I'm glad someone likes the idea, my gang members laughed at me when I told them...

I laugh some, but then look down a little, "I thought things would be different at hopes peak...that it would be good for me, but of course that didn't happen..." I say, making Chihiro look down some. "Yea...I thought the same thing...but one good thing that happened was meeting you...~" he says as he looks back at me, making me smile some. "Yea for sure~" I say with a laugh, but then remember his death, "I...still hate myself for what I did to you..."

"Please don't..." Chihiro says as he squeezes my hand. "I can't help it! I was afraid of you guys finding out my secret...I killed you for a stupid reason...it should've never happened..." I say, tearing up some as I look over at him, "I should've just faced it head on...like you...I should've..." Chihiro let's go of my hand and hugs me tightly, surprising me some, "It's okay Mondo...it's okay...~ I've already forgiven you...remember...~?" He says, making me tear up more and hug him back" I don't deserve it...I killed the one person I cared so much about...that I..." I stop myself, feeling my face go red. Oh crap...

Chihiro let's me go and gives me a confused look, "That you what...?" He asks curiously. Oh god! I wasn't planning on telling him today...Ugh! I knew this was gonna happen...to be honest I was actually gonna tell him at some point, but...I sigh some. I can't escape this now...I can't lie. I...have to tell him. I look down some. What's he gonna think...? Ugh! We just became friends again...this is gonna ruin everything between us...I take a breath and look over at him. Well...here goes nothing...

"I ah...I kinda sorta...had a thing for you..."

Chihiro's POV:

I feel my face go red, trying to process what he just said, "Y-You...did...?" I say, making him nod. "Yea..." Mondo says, looking down some, "I never told you because...I was afraid that I'd scare you off...I sometimes get nervous and raise my voice when I'm around someone I like...it usually always scares them off when it happens. That's partly why I've never dated anyone..." he says, making me look down some. So I was right...he's never dated anyone or...been in a relationship...

Mondo smiles some, "I was kinda surprised that...I didn't scare you off...you actually wanted to be around me...I started feeling less nervous the more we hung out and ate together...~" he says, sighing some and looking back at me, "That's another reason why...it upset me when I killed you...I lost someone that I...had feelings for. I didn't even care that you were a guy...yea I was shocked when you told me, but I...still liked you..." Mondo says, making my eyes widen some. He...liked me for me...? He...he actually...

I feel tears roll down my face, surprising and worrying Mondo some, "H-Hey! Don't cry! I...didn't mean to upset you...I'm-" "Do you...really mean that...~?" I ask, him smiling and nodding some, "I...never thought that...I'd ever hear those words..." my voice falters some as I continue talking, looking down some, "I...never thought that...anyone would ever like me...especially because of how I was treated back then at school..."

Mondo saddens some, "How could someone not like you..." he says as he takes my hand, making me blush and look back over at him. I...I can't believe this is happening...~ I wipe my eyes and smile some, "To be honest...I also...had feelings for you...~" I say, surprising him some, "When you defended me against Byakuya...I was upset at you when you said I couldn't defend myself, because of how right you were...despite being upset about that, I...still thought you were cool and...was happy that you did defend me...~"

He laughs a bit and looks down some, "Sorry about that...I really shouldn't have-" "No No don't be! What you said was true..." I say, interrupting him and smiling some, "What made me feel better...was when you made that promise between men with me...~" I look down some, "When you broke that promise I was so upset and...angry. How could someone I...admire so much...that I thought was my friend...kill me..."

I notice Mondo looking down and tearing up some, making my eyes widen, "B-But that doesn't matter now! I understand now why you did it...and I forgave you...~" I say, making him tighten his fists. "I don't deserve it. I don't deserve you forgiveness...your kindness...your friendship...I...I don't..." Mondo says, saddening me some. "Your wrong..." I say as I tear up and hug him again, surprising him some, "Y-You do...~" he hugs me back, pulling me closer. This hurts...seeing him like this...it's not just because it's him, but...it makes me feel like I'm looking in a mirror. It may not be exactly the same, but I know how he feels...

I release him from or hug, realizing that we're...closer to each other...I blush some when I realize that I'm...sitting in his lap, "Oh Uh...sorry...I guess I got caught up in the moment..." Mondo says as he looks away and rubs his neck , blushing some. It is kinda awkward, but...honestly..."Mondo..." I say, making him look back at me, "Yea...?" He says, sounding curious. I take a breath and get a little bit closer, which surprises him some. Now that I know how he felt about me before...I need to know...

"Do you...still like me...?"