Meant for each other ( Girlxgirl Teacherxstudent)

35

Samantha

I had a wonderful dinner with Skyler and Jace. I still can't believe Jace calls me mommy all the time and have him with me for two weeks. It's such a great feelingI never imagined that would ever happen again and certainly not so soon. And what a relief it is that he is happy that I am his mother. It could have been very different, that he'd be mad at me or whatever. I'm so happy with Skyler for arranging all this. I really wouldn't know what to do without her. And the look she has in her eyes, when she stares at Jace and me, it just sets your heart on fire.

We've been in the pool for a while now. Skyler is standing against the edge of the pool and I'm leaning against her, in her arms. We watch how Casper and Lara are playing with Jace and in between we give each other a lot of kisses. "You could almost say that Jace is their younger brother". I say to Skyler and she can laugh about it. "You would think so. And look at Casper being happy. He is finally not the only man in the house anymore". "Did you call Casper a man? He's more like a little boy." We both laugh when I say that. "Do I have a daddy?". Jace suddenly asks as he floats for us in an swimming tube. "No you don't have a daddy". I answer. "Okay so I have two mommies". He then says and I think he means my mother and me. "Chantal is not your mom, but she is your grandma". He shakes his head. "You and Skyler". I feel Skyler grab me tighter. I look at her for a moment and can't read her look in her eyes. "What do you mean?". I ask. Normally Skyler helps me with these kinds of conversations, but she stays quiet. She just holds me really tight. "Skyler is your girlfriend. Is she my mommy too?". He asks very happily. "Would you like that?". I don't really know how to respond to it. I see him nod and then I look back at Skyler. I see watery eyes and her gaze is blank. "Are you okay Sky?". She nods. "How do you feel about Jace calling you mommy?" She shrugs. This wasn't quite the response I expected. "Can he call you that if he wants to?". She nods and then kisses me. "Yeah I have two mommies. Mama Sammy and Mama Skyler". I hear Jace shout happily. I hadn't thought for a moment that he was following the conversation, well you can't really call it a conversation. After he has said that, he happily goes to Casper. I turn to face Skyler. "What's going on? I honestly expected a different reaction from you." She doesn't look at me. "Sorry I'm not very well." I almost believe that. "Skyler?". She kisses me and then lets go. "I think I ate too much. I'm going to change." She then wants to leave and I grab her hand. "Sky what's up?". She shakes her head and I can tell from her look that I have to let her go. I just let her go and she walks away. I really don't understand what's going on with her.
I stay in the water for another fifteen minutes with the rest and then it is time for us to go out. Casper and Jace agreed together that we would all watch a movie before Jace has to go to bed. When I get into the living room with Jace, Casper and Lara are already waiting for us. I needed a little more time, because I had to help Jace. Casper hangs in a chair and I put Jace on his lap, which makes both of them laugh. I then go to the kitchen to get a drink and am followed by Lara. "What's the matter with Skyler?". she asks as soon as we get to the kitchen and I shrug. "Are you having a fight?". I shake my head. "What's going on, because you would almost think so. I saw Skyler walk away from you in the pool and I see that it does something to you too". I sigh. "Ask her Lara because I have no idea what's wrong with her". I say irritated. "Wow sorry". I then look at Lara. "Sorry, I shouldn't take it out on you. I really have no idea what's going on, you have to be with her for that." She gives me an understanding nod. "It's all right. I've already tried to ask her. I threw some in the dumpster outside and saw her crying. I've never seen her like this, Sam. She didn't really appreciate me talking to her either. That's why I thought you two had a fight." When I hear Lara say that, my anger, that I had because of Skyler's reaction, completely disappears . There must really be something going on. "Can you and Casper go watch a movie with Jace? Then I'll go see her." Lara gives me a nod.

When I come outside I see Skyler sitting on a lounger. She raised her knees to her chest. She has wrapped her arms around them and has a glass of wine in her hand. I quietly walk towards her. I see that she quickly puts something away. "Sky what's going on?". She shakes her head. "Samantha can you please leave me alone". I can hear her crying. "Did I do something wrong?" She shakes her head. "What's going on then?". She sighs. "Samantha just leave me alone." I try to look at her, but her head is against her knees. "No I won't leave you alone. I'd like to hear what I've done wrong. You say I didn't, but your behavior says something completely different. That look you gave me says something completely different." I say almost screaming. She is looking at me now and her whole face is wet from the tears, which are still flowing. "Sweetie you really didn't do anything wrong. Sorry I should never have looked at you like that and acted like that to you". I sit next to her and grab her tight. "What's going on then?". She shakes her head. "Not now okay". she says sobbing. "Is it because of what Jace said?". Skyler starts to cry louder when I ask. "So it's because of that?". It takes a moment and then she nods. I didn't see this coming and I let her go. "Can't he call you mommy? Don't you want him to see us as parents? Don't you want to take care of him together? Tell me now, because then I know where I stand." I say angrily. Skyler then grabs my hands. "Oh god no sweetie it's not. I think it's an honor that he wants to call me that and of course I want to take care of him with you. I also hope that he comes to live with us forever." I shake my head for a moment. I was completely prepared for her to say she doesn't want to, because what she's saying now doesn't fit her behavior at all. "What is it?". She then gets up and walks away. She stares at the sky. "I'm already a mother Sammy". she says after standing like this for ten minutes. "What?". Skyler then sits down next to me again. "I have a daughter". I look at her in disbelief and then she hands me a photo. "This is my daughter Vera. I was seven months pregnant at the time of the accident. I had to give birth because there were complications. When she was born it turned out that something was wrong with her lungs. They only gave her a few hours, but she was a real fighter. She fought hard for almost four months. Unfortunately that wasn't enough, but I'm so glad I got to have her with me for at least four months." Tears are streaming down Skyler's face. I grabbed her tight. "Because of the accident I am also no longer able to become a mother again. That is why it touches me so much what Jace said. I did not see it coming. I immediately thought of Vera and that hurt. I also never imagined that I would ever be called mommy again and then it suddenly happens, on her death anniversary. Sammy it's really a great honor that Jace calls me mommy." After she has said that, we hug each other in a tight hug. "I'm sorry I lashed out at you like that. I really had no idea. I'm so sorry you had to go through that. I can't imagine how much that must hurt. Why didn't you tell me before?" She shrugs. "I didn't want to think about it anymore. As long as I don't think about it, it won't hurt." She says sobbing. "Sky that's not the solution. Look what a beautiful daughter you have. That's not something to hide. You say yourself that she was a fighter, that's something to be proud of". I try to wipe her tears away, but they keep flowing. "But it hurts." I hug her again in a tight hug. "I know baby. I'm here for you." Skyler grabs my face and gives me a long kiss. "What am I supposed to do without you?" she says very softly, after placing her forehead against mine. "Nothing. That's why we're together, because I can't do anything without you." She shakes her head with a smile. "I love you". "I love you too Sky". I give her a kiss. "Is Jace in bed yet?". I shake my head. "They are watching a movie". Skyler gives me a small smile. "Hurry up then you go back inside. This should have been a nice evening and I already ruined it. Go watch a movie with him and end the day with him." I look at her for a moment. "Aren't you coming in?" She shakes her head. "Skyler please come in." Then she kisses me. "Sweetie I'll be right there. I want to be alone just a little longer. I don't want Jace to see me like this." "Really?". She nods. "I promise you I'll be right there." We give each other another hug and kiss and then I go inside alone.

In the living room I let myself fall on the couch. I'm glad to see that Jace is totally in the movie and not getting any of this what's happening. He lies comfortably on Casper's lap. Lara sits right next to me. "Is everything all right?". I nod. "Do you know what's going on?" I nod again. "Are you sure you're okay?". I nod again and then hear Lara sigh. "Sam?". I then look at her. "Yes it's going well". "Then why are you sitting here like this and is Skyler  still outside?". she asks. "It was a pretty intense conversation and Skyler is coming soon." "Is everything okay between you two?". I nod. "What was the conversation about?". I give her a small smile. "I can't tell you. It's something from the past that Skyler has a very hard time with." Lara then nods in understanding. I hear the back door open and Skyler enters. She comes up behind me and then hangs half over the couch to give me a kiss. "Do you need anything from the kitchen?" I shake my head. "I only need you". She smiles when I say that. "Can be arranged. My face just needs some cold water and then I'll be there. Lara can I get you something?". Lara shakes her head. Skyler then glances at Jace and Casper. "Are the brothers also equipped with everything?". I nod with a smile. "Okay then I'll be right there." She gives me a kiss and goes to the kitchen.
Five minutes later she curls up as close to me on the couch and I hold her as tight as I can. "Mommy?". We hear Jace say after ten minutes. "Yes little one what is it?". I answer. "Um I mean Mommy Skyler". I look at Skyler who grabs me a little tighter again. She gives me a small smile and I give her a quick kiss. "Come here Jace." Jace then climbs off Casper and walks over to Skyler. Skyler picks him up and lays him on his back on the couch. "What are you still doing awake? Aren't you supposed to be in bed by now?". she says as she starts tickling Jace and he starts laughing out loud. "Will you read to me Mommy Skyler?". He asks after a few minutes when Skyler has stopped tickling. She then lifts him onto her lap. "Of course I want to. Shall we change my name first?". I give Skyler a questioning look as she says that to Jace. "What name do you want then?". Jace asks and Skyler gives him and me a smile. "Shall we agree you call Sammy mommy?". Jace nods and I wait to see what she's going to say. "And that you're going to call me mama. Otherwise we'll get all confused." She says with a big smile and I give her a big kiss. "Okay mama. Would you like to read me a story now? I'm tired". Skyler then stands up with him on his arm and takes my hand to take me along too. "Say goodbye to Casper and Lara." She says to Jace. "See you tomorrow Cas and Lara". "See you tomorrow Jace. Sleep tight." Casper and Lara say in unison. "Sleep well guys. I'm going to bed with these two. We're going to an amusement park tomorrow." Jace then starts yelling into Skyler's ear. "Yes we are going to amusement park". She smiles. "Oh looks like you don't feel like it, then we won't go." He shakes his head. "Just kidding. We're going tomorrow, but only if you sleep well." He nods enthusiastically. "But I wanted to ask if you would also like to come along?". She then asks Casper and Lara. "Yes please". Casper says enthusiastically and I see Lara shrug her shoulders. "Would you go upstairs with Jace? I'll be right there." I nod. She hands Jace over to me and kisses me. Then I go upstairs with Jace.