Separated

Chapter 34- "WHAT THE HELL MOM!"

We arrive at the beach at I can feel my heart rate pick up as henry admeaditly runs for the waves I watch as the watter splashes and it almost fells as if it's all in slow motion and the waters mocking me I set my stuff down and sit in my chair mom looks to me confused "aren't you gonna swim?" I look to her feeling myself tense "um... no not right now"  she nods "oh ok" and takes a seat beside me I look over to the waves and watch them closely my hole Body feels warm and my hearts betting so fast I tap my finger agents the chair as one bigger wave causes the water to come up close to my feat that's it i break and stand quickly walking away from the beach as fast as possible as mom yells "Charlotte! We're are you going" my lip tramples as I try to keep myself together and my breath comes out in small gasps every few seconds I make it a little farther away from the beach and fall to my knees my hand shakes as I put it up to my chest it feels as though my heart will beat out of my body and I can't seem to find breath I feel a hand on my back and turn to see mom looking at me very concerned I gasp for air and sob on her shoulder as she holds me I say in panic "I- I can't... it's scaring me" mom grabs my face and I try to move away from her "what?" I look at the still slightly visible ocean in fear "the ocean I can't it's like it's just reminding me of when I almost drowned" mom looks back at the ocean then to me as I choke on my own breath "honey breath... we might have to get you back in sessions with doctor hopper" i hear the question in her voice and look up at her as my breathing slows...

Reginas POV-

her breathing is less like gasp and more like hiccups now I rub her back my stomach twisting as her eyes meet mine a numb exasperation "no, I'm fine I don't need to go to doctor hopper" something about the way the words left her lips in a single breath hit me like a bus I can tell she's not fine I turn back to her as she stands and says "let's go swimming" I hear the uneasiness in her voice as She leaves my grasp and runs down the beach to we're henry is I sit there on my knees in the sand my gaze at the ground what the hell just happend she was crying then got up smiling like she didn't just have a whole break down I turn my head when I hear Henry's voice "hey mom you ok?" I nod smiling slightly just so he doesn't worry I stand and dust myself off walking back toreds the waves and see Charlotte standing there the water almost touching her feet I walk up to the spot we have our things set up and watch her closely she still doesn't move but she looks as though she's concentrating really hard

Charlottes POV-

I don't know what I just did or why I did but I just needed to stop being a problem theres to many things wrong with me I have to do something it's like I'm in the edge of a clif I'm so close that I could trip and fall the next time the wind blows but I'm standing just enough away that people can't tell in on the edge so I sit there and wait my insides screaming at me to step back but no matter how hard I try or if I even start leaning back away from the edge I'm pulled forward I jump when I here moms voice "are you ok?" I nod and turn around "can we just leave or can I just go?" She looks at me confused "yea of course we can leave if it's ok with henry" we both look to henry and he nods "yah sure It's a little chilly anyway" we make our way back to the car and mom makes up get all of the sand off of us before we even think about getting in the car ride home is silent and when we arrive I step out and walk up to the door quickly mom let's us in and I say "I'm gonna take a shower" Before running upstairs and to my room god I feel so pethetic I can't even go for a swim at the beach without freaking out maybe I should just stop caring or just stop feeling there has to be something that hurts less than whatever I'm doing now I grab some cloths and turn the shower on brushing through my hair before hopping in I was never given time to grieve over cam plus moms shoved me In And out of therapy sense we came to storybrook and she's trying to do it again I know she thinks she's helping but it's not it just makes me feel more deranged than I am and I hate it mom thinks she understands me she thinks we're so similar just because ive lost someone and I have magic but we're not we're completely different if I'm being honest I know she has her moments but some times she just pisses me off I shake my head trying to get rid of my thoughts and jump out of the shower drying myself off and putting on my pjs I walk down the stairs and she mom on the phone she furrows her brow when she sees me and holds the phone agents her chest so whoever's she's calling can't here her talk "Charlotte what are you doing in pagamas it 3 o'clock in the afternoon?" I shrug as she pulls the phone back up to her ear "yes thank you on Monday it is" I furrow my brow as mom puts the phone down "who was that?" I ask She smiles "I called doctor hopper your gonna have a session on Monday" my heart sinks and I have to hold back my emotions as I turn around and walk into the kitchen opining the fridge grabbing the pint of ice cream we have for special occasions and a spoon slamming the drawer shut I walk toreds the stairs past the living room we're Henry and mom now are and mom looks to me confused and in shock "Charlotte mills! You do not have ice cream before dinner in this house" I grit my teeth holding back tears of anger and turn to her finally breaking "you know what mom FUCK YOU!" I run upstairs ignoring both there shocked faces and slamb my door locking it I craw onto my bed and open he ice cream throwing the lid down angrily and getting a spoon full shoving it into my mouth and like I assumed it only takes seconds for mom to bang on the door "CHARLOTTE MILLS! OPEN THIS DOOR RIGHT NOW" I put down the ice cream and stand walking closer to the door and yelling back "NO!" I hear a scoff on the other side of the door then it flies open and mom looks to me the angriest I've ever seen her normally I would break under her stair but I hold my ground and glare at her causing her to look slightly taken aback she step closer to me her face looking semi calm now? She is right infront of me and says calmly but I can hear the hidden anger if I wasn't her daughter I'm guessing she would rip my heart out right now "Charlotte you will not leave your room until I say so" my jaw drops "WHAT THE HELL MOM!" She clenches her jaw and yells back venom lacing her voice "DONT WHAT THE HELL ME! I RAISED YOU" I scoff and cross my arm yelling in her face "OH YAH, YOU ONLY MISSED THE FIRST WHAT SEVEN YEARS!" She trows her hands up a purple glow coming of them and I'm pushed up agents the wall and held there I try to squirm but I simply can't as she steps forward "YOU WILL NOT LEAVE YOUR ROOM AND THATS FINAL!" She lets me go and I fall the floor as she stomps out of the room slamming the door I run and quikcly try to open the door but it won't budge I try using magic but it still won't work I slam my hand on the door and yell "I HATE YOU!" I sink down the floor sobbing my whole heart out why does everything bad always happen to me...

Reginas POV-

I lock her door and quikcly stomp off to my room I need to calm down I open my window and stick my head out sighing as I finally break down putting my head in my hands she said she hates me and I used magic on her like mother did to me I swore when I had Charlotte ide never be like my mother but here I am I gasp out for breath as all my emotions attack me I was so angry back there that I didn't let her words effect me but now there stabbing me in the heart like a knife I'm thrown out of my thoughts by a soft nock on my door I turn around to see a wide eyed henry in the doorway I internally sigh "henry I'm sorry didn't mean for you hear that" He nods and walks over pulling me into a hug "it's ok" I sigh and hold him as he says "I know she didn't mean any of it she was probably just upset" I pull back and look to him confused "what do you mean?" he sighs "she had to face the sea for the first real time sence she almost drowned that couldn't have been easy for her plus you told her you booked her a session with Archie you've had her in and out of therapy for years I know your only trying to help but when your parent puts you in therapy it just makes you feel insane like there's something wrong with you" my heart drops along with my face "oh my god I'm so sorry I never revised that's how you two felt" I start to tear up more he shakes his head "it's fine but I think the best thing is to just talk to her but give her a few minutes to calm down" I nod and he smiles kissing my cheek "I'm gonna go downstairs good luck" I smile at him and nod as her makes his way out of the room I sigh and take a few deep breaths before walking a cross the hall I go to knock on Charlottes door but pause felling the guilt build inside me when I hear muffled sobs I slowly push open the door and see her sitting on the floor beside her bed crying into her hand I step forward and crouch down her brown puffy eyes come up to meat my tear stained ones and she leaps forward hugging me I hold her close as she cries "I'm sorry but I don't wanna go to therapy please don't make me go" I sigh and run my fingers through her hair "no you don't have to go and you don't have to stay in you room either" she nods and I sit down so I can just hold her I stroke her hair gently "I shouldn't have used magic on you when I had you I promised myself I would never and I broke that promise but I won't ever again I'm so sorry sweetheart but I just need you to talk to me if you don't wanna go to therapy you just need to tell me of if you you ever think you might actually need to go I want you to tell me" she nods "I'm sorry I yelled at you and I'm sorry I cursed and I eat Ice cream before dinner and I-" she chokes on her words breaking my heart "I'm sorry I said you missed seven years of my life I know you didn't want to miss them just part of me wished we were never torn apart" I nod shearing a few silent tears "I know I've said so many things I didn't mean to when I was mad yelling at my mother being one of them but deep down I know she still loves me like I still love you" she smiles sadly "I'm sorry I said I hate you I really don't I love you so much and you've always been there it just feels like life's agents me" I frown and kiss the top of her head "I know it's hard sweetheart just know I'm there for you"...