𝘉𝘓𝘐𝘕𝘋𝘚𝘐𝘋𝘌𝘋 | 𝘈.𝘏. ✔️

• Eight

Chapter Eight: Love Now, Cry Later

One.

Two.

Three.

Four.

Five.

You whispered to yourself as you counted your figures over and over again silently in the guest bedroom. It was nearly two A.M. and you couldn't sleep after Hotch went to bed.

Immediately after you stepped into the house your body was on high alert. Reluctantly you reached over to the bedside table where Hotch had set your meds. Instead of grabbing the medicine, you reached for your journal. Now that you know Hotch is invested, you are too. You want answers for everything. Lesly said it was to stay with Axel and perhaps that true, but fifteen million is generous for something like that.

You clicked the pen and began writing.

Entry One

8/12/17 2:37 AM

Lesly said something before he died. "Take what I can give and stay with him." At the time I wasn't sure what that meant. The house was enough and I figured that he was giving me that, a large mansion so I wouldn't cross patches with his son. I remember going to the will reading. The lawyer was going around and reading everyone's shares and when it came to me I froze. Fifteen million was the price of torture. I was young and naive, fine with it as long as I could send simple checks to my father, to keep him afloat.

Axel didn't like me sending money. To anyone. Especially Celia. He said, "I give that bitch enough money for the shit she doesn't do babydoll." I remember that day because a dip was pushed into his lip and I thought it was disgusting. My father didn't approve of Axel and was always evident of staying away from Lesly. After mom and Sam died, he shifted away. When I told him about Axel his exact words were, "Jacobs? The man will never admit to anything. Don't go near him, his head is too far up his ass. His daddy pays for everything."

It was then he became violent. The first time he hit me it was because he fired Celia. We were just finishing dinner and she had dropped the plate on the ground, hurling her stomach. Axel thought the mistake was unrecognizable. She was gone for a year before returning. I didn't know that Tate was born during that time. Celia had a boyfriend but they broke off soon after.

Celia was quiet, scared of Axel to say the least. I couldn't imagine what he did to her. I wasn't strong enough to help and I'm still not. I wrote her a check at the hospital, Garcia will see it. She will wonder, Celia will insist I give it back but I need to prolong my protection with Hotch. I left myself little, barely enough to survive for more than five years. I'll begin to work again when I can, to make some more money. I have to keep digging, figure out how and why I got this money. Why did Celia leave for a year just to return? Why was my father begging me to leave Axel before he was even violent?

You closed the journal at the sound of footsteps. Heavy footsteps that traveled along the house walls, echoing. You hurried off the bed in an effort to catch Hotch. There wasn't a true reason why you wanted to see him, perhaps to give any information that you couldn't give him in the hospital because of shock.

After you swing open the door you tiptoe down the stairs once again, avoiding the loose boards. Hotch was sitting at the kitchen table, hair messed up from sleep, white shirt and plaid pants. You couldn't help but snicker at the sight. Only ever in movies had you seen a guy dress like that for bed. Hotch turned his body in the feeling of your presence. You smiled softly at him and made your way over to the table.

"Couldn't sleep?" you asked quietly. Jack was still asleep upstairs.

He nodded, running a hand over his stubble. "I could ask you the same."