The other woman

A death in her past

Alex dragged her suitcase into the lounge and kicked the door shut behind her. She was home! Turkey had been another race to forget for her driver. It had been a wet Sunday in Istanbul and after qualifying tenth, he'd finished the race in eighteenth after a very dodgy (in her opinion) call on tyres had been made by Seb and the team that had resulted in him having to pit again because the car had become virtually uncontrollable in the wet conditions. Slicks in the wet?! She shook her head again, she couldn't ever recall Seb making a wrong call like that, it was a gamble that hadn't paid off but then the team were at fault too for offering him the choice.

His mood after that had been on the low side and with Britta around, Alex hadn't been able to console him in the way that they'd have both liked. After getting the first available flight back to Zürich, they'd arrived back in the early hours of Monday morning and he'd gone straight home, wanting to be there when his children woke up but also wanting some time alone.

The house was silent and thanks to the timers that Seb had insisted on setting up, all the lights were on, as she liked them to be. She stood still, her eyes flicking from one object to the next; already she was hating the silence and hating being on her own. It was how it had to be though, she couldn't bear staying at Seb's and seeing him with his wife any longer.

Knowing she should head to bed, she left her case where it was and trudged up the stairs, her mind straying back to the man she loved. He'd probably be almost home now, almost back to Gisela who'd welcome him home with open arms and probably open legs too. "Urgh." She groaned as she reached the top of the stairs. "Don't even think about it! Only a few more months to go and he'll have left her."

Getting to her bedroom door she stopped suddenly, her fingers lightly pressing against the white painted wood. She frowned as she tried to think back to when she'd last been here, to how she'd left things. This door had been closed, hadn't it? Yet now it was open just a small amount. And the light inside, shouldn't that be on? She looked left and then right, her eyes scanning the hallway. The light was on here and every other door was closed, it seemed odd that she'd leave this open. But then I did leave in a hurry and I'm not entirely sure if Seb put a timer on the lights in my bedroom. "Yeah, that's what's happened." She muttered to herself, feeling her whole posture relax. "It's been a bit of a shitty weekend, I'm knackered and as usual, I'm thinking too much." She pushed the door fully open and headed inside, flicking the switch on the wall and illuminating the room with a reassuring, bright light. Then with a gasp, she switched the light straight off. The curtains were wide open. I'm sure I'd closed them. This is fucking weird. She marched straight over to the window and hastily pulled them across before going back to switch the light on, her thoughts immediately going to Seb and blaming him. They'd been up here and indulged in a heated session before they'd left for the airport, he must have opened them before he'd come down the stairs. Yet he knows how I feel about leaving them open, especially at night.

Switching on the bedside light, she hastily undressed and then turned off the ceiling light before clambering into bed. She now felt unsettled and wary and decided to keep her bedside light on - just in case.

She closed her eyes and laid there, fidgeting every minute or so as she tried to relax and get comfortable. The silence felt like it was pressing down on her and she could see the light from her lamp through her eyelids. She wasn't going to get to sleep anytime soon.

Finally with an annoyed huff, she reached a hand out and switched off the light, plunging the room into darkness.

Half an hour passed and she still couldn't sleep. The bed felt empty and cold, the whole room felt cold and it made her wonder if the heating had gone off. She wished that she could have a certain German in bed next to her. His presence alone would be comforting and she'd feel warm and safe with her body pressed up against his and his arms around her while she used his chest as a pillow and listened to the soothing, rhythmic beating of his heart. She tried to focus her mind on that thought, closing her eyes and picturing Seb sleeping peacefully next to her. Somehow, it worked and within a few minutes she'd nodded off to sleep.