N's Whacky Adventures

But The Pen Was NOT PEN!

(A/N: Written like joke, because I couldn't find out how to properly add lightsabers with a proper sense written format)

"Put that conventionally attractive male down!" shouts Uzi from across the... room, chamber, storage place. What is the proper term for this place?

N is waving, so Uzi has to use her elbow to remind N that he has something to do.

N seems to recite something he probably had stuck in his head for a while, "J, You are sometimes kinda mean to me, and I wish you weren't, just some constructive criticism!"

"Nice." Uzi and N fist bump.

J looks triggered, "Noted traitor." taking out another pen, clicked it, and there is a plasma yellow light that emerges from the tip. My gosh it's a lightsaber.

Uzi be thinking the same thing and looks down at the pen she got and clicks it and it's a purple lightsaber.

"Whoa, this is nice. I'm keeping it." Uzi decides to keep the pen.

"Can I have my own glowing pen?" N wants one.

"Lightsabers are for loyal drones." declares J.

V brings out two red light-pens. Oh no.

Meanwhile the lad named Thad checks his pipe, then finds there is a button on this pipe. He clicks it and suddenly it becomes the two bladed maul-like lightsaber, but blue.

"Awesome." Thad says signature line.

"What about me?" N wants one.

Khan looks at his mug... and then stops looking at it. Not wanting to think about it. Instead he sips whatever the heck he's drinking. Tea or coffee IDK.

Suddenly a pen appears before N, because the N fans collective mind conscious formed him his own light-pen.

N picks it up, ignites it, and it's green.

"Whoa, this is awesome." N gives it a few waves, "Swoosh swo-"

Uzi smacks him, "Pay attention N! Now who do you want to take on?"

"J please."

"Too late!" Uzi just hurls the light-pen like a rogue Jedi and nearly decapitates J, nearly, J just deflected it.

Thad leapt up from behind, J manages to bring up her pen saber to block his overhead strike.

Thad, "I'm ready for a second match."

"I would say what a poor choice, but you'll find that out soon enough." says J.

Uzi runs up from behind and snatches up her light-pen from the ground and ignites it again.

Meanwhile N be like, gesturing with his finger, 'You me? Uh, please go easy?'

V looks like she is ready to vent out some sadistic joy. N expression falls and he barely brings up his light-pen to block V's attacks.

'Why does she get light pens? I want two pens!' whines N in his head.

But then J having more skill kicks Uzi back some couple yards who tumbles across the ground and her light-pen deactivates cause that is what they do when they fall out of your hand.

Thad blocks several of J's strikes, J is being unnecessarily flashy just to flaunt her skill in the face of inexperienced Thad who is putting all his effort into this because they best game he did like this was baseball. Which probably explains why he's using this double bladed saber pen as if it was some double bladed baseball bat.

That attempts to counter attack with several baseball swings, but J easily deflects them. J even scars him right across the face with her stinger. Which makes him turn ever so slightly and let out a pained noise. J uses this opportunity to slice off one of his legs making him fall and then just driving her saber right through his chest.

Uzi does a signature star wars quote, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" cause Thad was like, her only friend you know? Who actually, surprises me by how chill he is despite having a railgun pointed at his face for some couple seconds.

J pulls out her light-pen and then turns her attention back to Uzi, "One toaster down, one to go."

Uzi brings out her railgun, but sees that J had cut off the front tip, "Damn it!" Uzi looks for her light-pen, sees it just a couple yards in front of her.

So she scrambles for it, only for J to use the force and grab it with her other hand. Cause J can use the force cause I said so.

J be smiling, "You don't believe I'm going to give you a fighting chance right?" she then crushes the purple light-pen in her hand.

Uzi sees Thad's lightsaber, she tries to mimic J's force pull thing... but it doesn't work. Because she isn't the mary sue of star wars, that belongs to Rey Skuywulker Pakatine.

Though Khan just slowly began moving towards Thad's lightsaber. Just ever so subtly trying to scoot over. Since V and N are still clashing in the sky like some dark angels or something, and J is approaching Uzi menacingly.

J stands over Uzi, who just looks defeated inside. N notices.

"UZI!" but he can't do anything because V is using light-pens. So he takes big risk move which involved a few quick blocks and then striking when V is striking, with a perfect cut that cut off the upper part of her light-pens.

"My pens!" V is in shock.

N then kicks V into concrete floor. But don't worry V is fine.

N rushes in, but J is like a Sith Lord cuz she got yellow eyes, well they all have yellow eyes but N is fake Sith Lord so he is no match for being force pushed so hard he smashed through some metal container.

"I should have done that long ago." says J with a smirk, "Now then, any last words you'd like to say?" she directs this to Uzi who just glares at her.

Then Khan then calls out to Uzi, "Uzi! Catch!" and throws Thad's light-pen.

Uzi reaches up to grab it.

But J merely snarls and throws her lightsaber which just cleaves Khan in half. Ouch. He didn't even get to react much, only have his eyes widen in shock. Why does redemption moments always cost the character's life?

Uzi catches the lightsaber and J brings out her claws, but Uzi easily removes both her arms, then her tail, then her head, in quick succession. Then finishes her off by jamming it into her torso, then pushing her corpse off the light-pen saber with her foot.

Uzi falls back down, tired, and thinking about her life choices.

N then lands beside Uzi, "What did I miss?!"

Uzi weakly points over in the direction of J resting in pieces.

"Oh, that's nice." N also notices the crowd of worker drones be terrified by what the heck just happened. Also noticing the two dead worker drones.

"...Sorry about your dad." says N.

''I'm not.' is Uzi's thought, "Don't worry about it." she's more concerned about Thad.

...

"The end!" N finishes his story.

Uzi looks, a mixture of impressed, irritated, and happy for some reason. V is bored. Ghost J is angry again.

"That was actually pretty nice N! Better than V's story!" compliments Uzi.

V rolls her eyes, "Well if he made it better than mine, I must have told a story better than your crap."

"You question my choice of anime?! It's one thing to want my oil, it's another thing to insult the one good thing humans produced!" Uzi angry.

Ghost J just looks over at N, '...How about I tell my story?'

N shakes his head, "No you'd just make it about killing Uzi or something."

'Exactly.'