From a streetkid to a Peaky Blinder (Peaky Blinders)

So tell me

(Fievel's P.O.V.)
I had woken up multiple times but was quick to fall unconscious again. Sometimes I would wake up and see I was moved to the couch with the fireplace burning. Another time I noticed I was been carried towards the car. Eventually, the last time I woke up I was in dad's house in my room. With a lot of effort I succeeded in getting up from my bed. I started to walk around the room I haven't been in for a long time. The familiar feeling of a home filled my body. There was warmth from the familiar walls as I travelled my fingers across them. I knew the room had not been changed since the last time I've been in here. Everything was in the same place. The peaked caps I had worn when I was younger were hanging on the hooks on the wall. The small children's coats and clothes were folded neatly in my dresser. I thought the clothes would've been thrown away as soon as I grew out of them. But they weren't. I grabbed a peaked cap and brought it to my face. I took in the scent of it and colours danced in my mind. The familiar scent of burned wood, whiskey and horses filled my senses. It was what dad smelled like and people used to tell me I smell just like him when I was around him. I placed the cap back on the hook and walked further around my room. Memories were flooding my mind as I looked at the paintings of me and either one or multiple members of the Shelby family. There was also a painting of me and my horse Feisty Filly. I grinned at the oil painting. I remember the mare not wanting to stand still at all when we were getting painted. I had to bribe her with so many treats. My mind told me to go get her and run from this life and start over. So I turned around and made my way to the stable block. No matter how much pain I felt while walking I still forced myself to continue. I walked into the dining room and saw dad sitting at the head of the table. "Where are you going?" He asked me as he noticed me. "Away from here" I answered him as I walked to the door behind him. He immediately stood up from the chair. "No. No you're not leaving this house with a wound like that" he ordered stepping in front of me while pointing to my bullet wound. "I think I'll manage" I told him and stepped past him. He grabbed my wrist and pulled back "you are not leaving and that's an order" he growled. I chuckled at him "I don't care if you saved me from bleeding out on Polly's table. I'm not your son anymore and you can't order me around anymore" I told him. "You are a fucking Shelby, Fievel. And I'm your father which makes you my son" he snarled back. "I'm not your son. And you made that very clear as soon as you left me for dead in that rotting cell!" I yelled and looked him straight in the eyes, "so tell me. Did you love me? Ever?". He stayed silent and turned away from me. "or was it all for show. Come on. Tell me! Did you love me or not!" I screamed my lungs out while he ignored my outburst. I felt tears sting my eyes but I kept it under control. "Go on! Tell me cause I have to know if the best fucking part of my life was fake!" I shouted at him. He stayed silent and moved his head every time I tried getting into his vision. "Fucking tell me the truth that you didn't love me, so I can be reminded of the piece of shit I am. Did you love me or not!". My breathing became harsher as I became angrier and angrier. "Answer me!" I cried out and my lip began to quiver. It stayed silent before he answered me. "No" he simply stated with no emotion at all.

I felt a stab in my heart when he confirmed his answer. I nodded and let out a shaky breath while wiping a stray tear away that slid down my cheek. I turned around and walked to the door, the silence surrounding me as I reached for the doorknob. "And that sentence would make me a liar, Fievel". My eyes furrowed in confusion before I turned my head to look at him. "You and I both know that I do not lie to the people I love" he said and looked up at me. "The words I love you have never been sufficient enough for me. For true parental love, there is no need for words. Love can be just felt living in that moment and enjoying that moment even without uttering a single word" he calmly spoke, "but let me use my words anyway" he said and looked me in the eyes as he stepped forward. "The love I hold for my son, Fievel Shelby, is and always will be unconditional". I stayed silent as my mind processed what he had just said. "then why don't I believe you?" I softly ask him. I asked him to tell me if he loved me. He answered, but it sounded like he had learned the lines at the top of his head. "You don't believe me?" He asked me surprised at my answer. I shook my head at him. He nodded before turning around "stay here cause I'm going to show you something" he ordered me. Even though I wanted to get out of this house, my curiosity that I have always had since I was little got hold of me. He walked to a specific cabinet and opened the drawer. I watched him grab a file before he closed the drawer again. He turned back around and made his way back to me.

He threw the file on the table and pointed at it "open it and take a look at it". I looked from him to the file. Eventually, I grabbed the file and opened it. I realized the file contained a couple of documents.

(Tommy's P.O.V.)
Filly's eyes snapped up to meet mine after he discovered a certain document. "You know that I don't have a birth certificate so they mean very little to me. But they do mean a lot to you" I told him as I referred to when he asked me where his certificate was. "But it doesn't say Fievel Shelby" he said to me. I nodded at him. "It... It says Fievel Morgan Shelby" he said with a shaky breath as he pointed at the name "yes. I changed your name cause I wanted to give you your mothers maiden name as well as mine. I remember when you told me you would love to have her name as well". I watched his lip start to quiver and tears filled his eyes. "Why? Why did you do that for me?" He asked with tears, "cause I love you".

Published: 16th of December 2021