Broken Toys - Johanna Mason x fem reader

Chapter 20 - Victor Or Soldier?

The days passed by and I was busy with my training once again. Johanna had reassured me several times that she would be fine, before I had agreed to train the whole day again. When I met her at dinner, I noticed that she was upset. "Johanna, did anything happen?", I asked her worried. 

She exchanged a glance with Katniss, which did not ease the anxiety inside of me at all. "Coin refused to let Katniss and me join the final battle. Now we've to start training tomorrow and pass a special exam to get a chance", she grumbled. 

Honestly a great part of me wished that Johanna would not pass the test, but I knew that it was selfish. She had good reasons to fight as well and I could understand her. 

"You can't persuade me not to", she added eyeing me carefully. 

"I wouldn't have tried to anyway", I assured her. 

"Great. Cause training already started today and I'm too tired to discuss that now", she admitted bluntly.

Katniss looked utterly exhausted as well. I remembered that her ribs were still healing and she looked like she was in pain. "Katniss? You alright?", I worried. 

"Yeah, I got a new treatment for my ribs to recover faster", she explained.

Tonight was horrible. It was not like I had had a great night latelyt hanks to everything going on and the constant nightmares that were plaguing either Johanna or me or both of us. Since a few days Katniss' had also joined the scene. 

But today was another extend. Katniss was battling the pain of her rib treatment and Johanna was struggling with her morphling withdrawal. I woke up to Johanna insulting Katniss. Apparently district 7 had a lot of ways to swear and curse and Johanna knew them all. I made sure that she was drinking enough water, which was a battle on its own. Johanna was not able to think clearly anymore as she was really suffering, which hurt me too. I just wanted her to finally get better. 

As the sun raised again, Johanna was eager to drag Katniss to training. Sleep was not an option anymore anyway. So I decided to go to training early as well. 

"I don't think I can handle this today", Katniss confessed. "Of course you can. We will both handle it. We are victors, remember? We survive everything they throw at us", Johanna stated. 

She was looking completely sick and was shaking badly. Preferably I would have tied her to the bed, but I knew that I could not stop Johanna as she was stubborn as hell. And maybe she needed the training to improve her health. 

Reluctantly Katniss got up.

When I returned from training that evening, Johanna and Katniss were not in the infirmary. One of the paramedics told me that we had gotten a new room. I searched for the right number, knocked and opened the door. Johanna and Katniss were talking to each other on eye level, something I had never experienced between the two before. They had not noticed me yet. So I stayed silent and listened curiously. 

"May be. But he has changed", Katniss said. 

"You too. And (f/n) and me. And Finnick and Haymitch and Beetee. I'm not even talking about Annie Cresta. The arena broke us all pretty well, didn't it? Or are you still the same you were back then, when you volunteered for your sister?", Johanna questioned. 

"No."

"That's the only thing the psycho doc may be right about. There is no way back. So we could as well move on", Johanna recalled.  

She moved and the lights turned off. Literally kept in the dark. Thanks!

"Aren't you afraid that I'll kill you tonight?", Johanna joked.