✓ GREEDY HEARTS | JAY

24 - Like a Moth To a Flame

JAY'S POV

Do you ever just do something and keep on thinking about it for the rest of your life? That's exactly how I feel at this moment, sitting here in the middle of a meeting with people who have no idea that my mind is a million miles away. But now, as I sit in this meeting room surrounded by the hum of conversations, I can't help but think of her and everything she's managed to make me feel in the span of a few fleeting moments.

I didn't think you were the type to stay. When I recall her words, I clench my jaw. I've never been the type to linger, to let anyone get too close. But with her, it's different. She's not just anyone and there's this need burning within me to understand why. Why does she affect me in ways no one else ever has? Why did I let her in when I've built walls so high that no one could breach them?

The memories of last night are still vivid in my mind, like a reel playing on a loop. The taste of her, the feel of her skin, the way her body responded to mine—all of it lingers, refusing to be dismissed. She's not written in Braille and yet, every time I touch her, it's like I'm deciphering a language that only she and I understand. And perhaps that's why I'm too afraid to let her go, afraid to admit that she might be the exception to my carefully crafted rules. 

"Do you have any thoughts on this, Park?" The question pulls me back to the present, and I realize that everyone is looking at me, expecting an answer. For fuck's sake, this is not even a meeting that requires my presence. I could be doing something much more productive than pretending to care about these discussions.

I clear my throat, trying to shake off the lingering thoughts of the bedroom. "I was in fact considering the proposal. I think we should move forward with the suggested changes," I say, trying to sound composed, though my mind is anything but. "And I would like you to refrain from requesting my presence when it comes to these trivial matters. If I have to come here and approve every minor decision, I might as well fire everyone in this room and run the company by myself. That sounds more efficient."

They exchange glances while I stand up abruptly, pushing my chair back with a screech against the floor. I don't bother to offer further explanations and it's not like I'm ready to admit my mind is too busy thinking of a woman that, a few days ago, could swear she'd ruin my life. When I step out of the room, I find one of the managers waiting for me in the hallway. "Mr. Park, can you spare a moment?" I raise my eyebrow, urging him to elaborate. My presence is not so easily at the disposal of others. "It's regarding the upcoming partnership with Mr. Lee." 

Ah. Finally something worth my attention. But only then I realize I haven't heard from Ethan so I check my phone quickly. Fuck. It's not that he didn't call or massage me, I'm the one who missed several messages from him. I quickly scroll through the notifications and dismiss the manager before dialing his number and heading to my office. After a few rings, he answers. 

"Jay, the nation's hot CEO," His voice makes me chuckle as I pace in my office. "I read your messages and I wanted to ask you for dinner, but since you decided to play hard to get, I thought I might visit for a few minutes. I'm in the elevator, you little shit." 

I roll my eyes, despite the slight smile playing on my lips, and wait until I hear the elevator ping outside my office. The door opens, revealing Ethan, dressed in a casual suit that suggests he might have come straight from another engagement. His style had always been simple and elegant and I love that about him. He could look good in anything. "Mr. Lee. What a pleasure to see you again."

"You never call me that," I watch as he takes a seat in front of me, his gaze searching mine for any hint of what might be bothering me. "I was watching your trending thirst traps while driving here. They're quite bold, even for you."

"Jungwon's idea. I punched him so this is probably his version of revenge. Though it would have been better to make people pay to see me shirtless. Missed opportunity for profit."

"I'm pretty sure there's a market for it." I almost scoff at his words. Me selling half naked pictures on OnlyFans? Maybe in another life, if I wasn't the CEO of a multimillion-dollar company with an image to maintain. "Now, what's on your mind, Jay? You seem a bit... preoccupied."

"My life is taking unexpected turns," I confess, leaning back in my chair. "There's someone."

"Oh yeah, I heard. There's this rumor that you took Choi Minho's woman and it's causing quite the stir." Ethan raises an eyebrow, waiting for confirmation or denial.

"She's not his woman." For fuck's sake. I could have replied more eloquently, but the frustration lingers in my voice. "She worked for him and now she's working for me. But stealing something from him sounds more like a bonus than a problem. And yes, it's her. The... someone."

"I was told you were looking for her background. What happened with her?" The way the corners of his lips slightly curl up tells me Ethan is genuinely intrigued, like a chess player considering what move to make next. I take a deep breath, contemplating how much I should reveal. It's not like I'm about to admit that I'm attracted to her, that I let her get under my skin and I'm too damned curious to figure out why. That's not a vulnerability I'm willing to expose, especially to someone like Ethan who's too good at reading between the lines. One wrong word from me and he wouldn't let me hear the end of it. 

"She's complicated," I speak after a few seconds of silence, choosing my words carefully. But it seems this much is enough for Ethan to catch onto the subtleties of my confession.

"That's love. You caught feelings. It happens to the best of us."

"I haven't caught shit," I retort defensively. "And it's not fucking love. It's... I don't know what it is." I'm honestly at a loss for words. Whenever I think about what could this feeling I have for her, my mind becomes a chaotic mess. Desire, curiosity, and something else that I'm not ready to label.

"Jay, you're not known for being indecisive. If it's not love, then what is it that's making the great Park Jay stumble over his words?" I sigh, running a hand through my hair. It's not about stumbling over words. It's about not having the right words. I can't quite define what this is because it doesn't fit into any neat category. It's like standing at the edge of the unknown, and that's not a place I'm comfortable with. 

"It's not about indecision," I finally admit, leaning forward and resting my elbows on the desk. "It's about uncertainty. I don't know what she means to me, and that's a problem. I do care about her, for some reason. She's been through a lot," I finally admit, my voice softer than I intended. "And it's not just about the scars on her body. There's something in her eyes, something that hints at a pain deeper than any physical wound. And... I find myself wanting to understand that pain." 

"My man, it sounds like you're in deep." He says with a knowing grin and all I want is to roll my eyes at his statement. Ethan always has a way of making things sound more complicated than they are. Yet, deep down, I know he's onto something. "But I can see why. The fact that she's not scared of you scares you." It's not a question; it's a statement. And instead of denying it, I find myself nodding in reluctant agreement.

"Yeah," I admit, exhaling slowly. "It does." 

Maybe I'm afraid of losing control, of being exposed in a way I've never allowed before. Or maybe I'm afraid I'd end up caring more than I should, and becoming greedy for something I know would ultimately be my downfall.