Scared Angel

4. Home?

 It was a long trip home. Not because of the distance but due to Eleanor's upset screams the whole way. Linus tried to play with the girl in the seat next to him but she had no interest. "Aunty penny" Linus addresses starting to slip into a younger headspace.
"Yes li?" I all but scream over the wails of the distressed girl. "Ewnor look non comfies" he states as simply as he can. I look back up through the mirror and see she's almost slumped and trying to hold herself up. She doesn't have the best mobility in her body. I don't know if it's due to the malnutrition and brutal bones or her lack of gross and fine motor skills.
I finally pull up and help Linus out of the car, I can hear the screams of the 23 year old from outside of the car. I sigh and prepare myself for a whole new life as I open the car door and help her out of the car. I try to put her feet on the ground but she screams louder and clings to me. I lift her onto my hip and her crying subsides as she nuzzles into my neck sniffling heavily,
I grab my bag and her few things as well as Linus sleep over bag since it's his night with me, while his mommy and daddy are on their date night.
I walk into the room with her and realize I don't have any protein shakes for her. I let Lars, my Belgian malinois, outside to do his business and play.
As I think of my plans for going to the grocery store and pharmacy I feel something wet on my breast. I jump and realize it's Eleanor's lips on my nipple through my shirt. I'm not wearing a bra and I almost pull her off but she whines in protest. I don't want to disturb her and the feeling is odd, but this is a clear sign she is still young enough mentally to breastfeed.
With the new consent, I've decided if I'm going to care for the girl I'm going to do it right. Once Eleanor falls asleep still suckling, I pull her off and plop her paci in her mouth fast.
I sigh when she only stirs a little before grabbing her blankie, draped around my shoulder, with her little fist tightening and loosening her grip ever so slightly in her sleep.
I don't want to move her but I place her in the middle of the bed and put pillows around her body as well as her blankie and frog as well.
I go online and search for a car seat in her size, the doctor told me she was nearly five feet tall but only 72 pounds. I found one perfect for her size and ordered it. I watch the baby sleep next to me as I contemplate ordering a crib. I look at adult cribs but decide to build one like my sister and her husband did. I do buy an adult sized bouncer though for when I can't be by her side.
Eleanor starts to stir and she lets out small coo like whines as she stretches I can't help but almost melt at the sight. I realize she needs some more clothes as she falls back to sleep.
I end up making a large order of everything she may need before she wakes up.
When she does open her eyes she cries and reaches for me. I smile and pick her up. "Did little Ellie sleep well?" I coo as she giggles and I pat her diaper realizing it's quite full.
• • • • •
I let Lars back inside and got the baby changed before I  helped Linus use the potty.  I then got the kiddos strapped into the car once again. Eleanor didn't like leaving my arms one bit, and wanted us to know how upset she was by throwing everything we tried to give her for comfort while screaming loudly.
I hope every car ride isn't like this, especially since Linus quite likes his car rides and tiny tunes with his aunty. I arrive at my local grocery store and get Linus and Ellie into a kids cart. I push the two around the store getting protein powder, vanilla breakfast carnations for Ellie's bottles until my milk comes in, I grab snacks for Linus that he points out and baby snacks for Ellie, I get some baby meals and baby food as well.
Linus seems to keep Ellie happy for most of the trip until I'm waiting in line for our prescriptions she seemed to have had enough and wanted to be held. I didn't want to cause a scene so I pick her up as I walk to the counter.
• • •
Once back to the car Ellie is fast asleep. I'm grateful she fell asleep in my arms while waiting for the prescriptions to be filled. The pharmacist gave me a weird look but was kind enough to mind her own business. It took 15 minutes of waiting before I was able to strap the kids back into the car and drive us home.
The car ride was peaceful with only the sound of a soft Disney song playing in the background as both kids slept in the back.
I pull up at the house and sit in the garage while I order a pizza. After this day I don't feel like cooking, once it's ordered I get out and get Ellie first before I carry her around to Linus' side.
I open his door "come on bubs we're home" i coo as I shake him awake. He opens his eyes and tries to push me away. "If you wanna sleep in the car and miss pizza then that's fine by me" I tease "you know aunty loves her pizza" I chuckle as his eyes widen and he quickly exits the car making a run for the door. "No running Linus" I scold while closing the door and walking inside.
I put the groceries away while Linus plays with the toys he brought over. I heat up a breakfast carnation for Ellie and put it one of her bottles. The moment the nipple touches her lips she suckles hungrily as I feed her. I carry her to the couch and turn on octonauts for them.
We finish our pizza while watching the childlike show, Linus eats messily in front of the tv while Ellie takes two small bites of my pizza. More like sucked on two small cut pieces and spit out the soggy crust. After a while Linus joins us on the couch, cuddling up with his Dino stuffy while sucking his paci and watching the show intently. Even Ellie, who is now sucking on her paci as well seems entranced by the tv universe. I smile down at the two snuggle bugs and pull them closer so they can both lay on my chest comfortably. I feel Lars jump up to snuggle into us as I give them both a delicate kiss to the head. We all drift off in each other's warm embrace.