Scared Angel

8. New friend?

Penny's pov:

I wake up to my phone ringing, I groan and reach for it knocking it to the floor; I get up and get the phone answering as I sit back on the bed. "Hello?" I ask not having looked at the collar ID. "Bitch, where have you been?" I here my best friend screech. "I haven't heard from you in two weeks." I cringe realizing I've ignored her accidentally since I got Ellie.
I end up explaining everything as I get up to make breakfast. "Can I meet her?" She squeals. I think about it for a moment, "well I think that should be okay, she might be scared and shy at first" I explain as I plate the small pancakes and fruit salad.
"Yay! I'm on the way" she says and hangs up. I wasn't expecting it to be today...I shake my head at my crazy best friends antics and fix Ellie's bottles and myself a cup of coffee before I walk upstairs to wake the sleepy girl.
When I walk in I see her sleeping with her butt in the air causing me to giggle. I walk to her and lift her out of her crib, she tries to push away from me and dive back into her crib. "Oh come on sleeping beauty! It's time to start our day" I sing song as she gives up trying to get back into bed but settles for pushing her face into my breasts.
       I rub her back and try to lay her on the changing table but she won't let me go trying to get to my boobs. "Someone wants my boobies first this morning huh?" I sigh, trying to give her a protein shake this morning instead of breastfeeding has already failed.
       I unbutton my shirt for her and she latched on immediately, I whence this time since she latched weird. Once I detach her and re-latch her correctly, she hums in contentment and closes her sweet little eyes. We nurse for a while until she finally decided she's done, I carry her to the changing table and quickly change her diaper and clothes into one of the onesie I ordered for her.
      Once she's dressed for the day, I place her on my hip and walk to the kitchen. She lays her head on my shoulder while I put the small pancakes without syrup on her high chair tray with her new sippy of water.
        I buckle her into her chair and sit to eat my own pancakes as I feed her some fruit in between bites of pancakes. She eats most of her breakfast only making a minimal mess. She won't touch her sippy cup and mostly spits the water I try to give her out. I read that 6 months olds struggle to get used to sippy cups so I'm not worried but I do need to try soft tip sippies instead while she's adjusting.
        I'm cleaning her hands and face when I hear my door unlock and then open. I hear Lars runs to the door and barks once before he sniffs Melinda, he runs between her legs to greet her like he likes to do.
         I pick up my unhappy baby and carry her on my hip to meet my best friends of 12 years. "Baby I've got someone for you to meet." I say in almost a questioning tone, the moment she sees Mel she hides in my chest and pushes as far into me as she can.
         "She's had a scary life" I tell Melinda sadly. She nods and sits at the far end of the couch as I sit on the other end. We talk about how our lives have been going and just everything else while Ellie is hiding. After 30 minutes she starts looking at Melinda through my arm but is trying to be sneaky about it. Melinda spots the silly girl and we make eye contact before chuckling. We go back to our conversation but after 10 minutes I start scooting closer to my friend.
         Ellie looks up at me but doesn't shy away like I thought. I watch the curious girl peak over at Melinda and reach up to touch her face. We both coo at her cute nature as Mel touches the girls hand on her cheek. "I'm Melinda, I heard your name is Eleanor" I hear my best friend say to her. "Your mama calls you Ellie so you can call me Melly, we have long names huh?" She asks as if she can understand her. Ellie just giggles and crawls to her lap. I smile happily at her accepting someone besides me, she makes sure to keep me in her sight the whole time but enjoys her talks with her new friend, Well Melinda talks while Ellie babbles.
I enjoy watching the two for a little bit when my belly rumbles so I ask Melinda if she's hungry. She nods and asks for a cup of coffee, I smile and stand. She follows behind me with a still babbling Ellie. She sits at the kitchen table and Ellie watches me intently to make sure I don't leave her. Mel explains to Ellie everything I'm doing in great detail, which cracks Elle up. I start the coffee in the French press as I move on to make us a charcuterie board of snacks. I lay out Crackers of different kinds, mozzarella cheese, cheddar cheese, Brie cheese, pepperoni, salami, prosciutto, green olives, apples, strawberries, blueberries, cantaloupe and watermelon. I get us some stroopwafel cookies for our coffee and lay the board on the table before getting our coffees; making them to our liking with vanilla cream before sitting down with my cup and handing Melinda her own.
We gossip about old friends while sipping from our cups. Ellie enjoys some fruit and cheese before she asks to nurse by basically shoving herself up my shirt. I notice the time and realize she could go down for a nap before lunch.
I nurse Ellie while Melinda asks me questions about breastfeeding. "Does it hurt" I chuckle at her question. "It does but Ellie needs the nutrients." I explain. "What does it feel like?" I think for a moment before answering "well the sucking feels like a gentle tugging sensation, when done correctly. And the milk flowing is a tingling warm feeling. It's a feeling of relief when my breasts are full of milk." She nods and asks more questions until my breasts are empty and my girl is asleep. I stand to put her to bed, I put her paci in her mouth once she is in her crib along with her blankie. Grabbing  the baby monitor, I make a quiet exit out of the room and back down to my friend.
"Hey, mama" she jokes when I walk in. "Oh hush I'm not her mom" I sigh still very torn apart at the idea of if I can get attached in that way.
"What are you talking about? She's an adult but she has no ability to care for herself. You said yourself that she had a scary life and she's so attached to you! Of course you're her mama! She may not be able to tell you with words but she sure does tell you with her actions." My best friends sucks in a big breath. "Are you sure?" I ask still insecure on the topic. She laughs and gets up to hug me. "Babe, I can tell that girl already loves you like any baby would a mother" she says this looking into my eyes and I can tell she really believes what she's telling me. "Hm, I guess your right."
We go back to snacking and chatting and before we know it it's time for Mel to go back home to her man. She kisses my cheek and tells me she loves me. "And If you ghost me for almost a month ever again I'm gonna move in!" she screams as she walks outside and to her car. I shake my head as I close the front door and move to the couch before sinking down. Lars jumps up to lay on my lap licking my face and snuggling me.
       I decide it's almost time to wake Ellie but walk to make pasta in a creamy basil Parmesan sauce with sun dried tomatoes and garlic bread. Before the pasta is done I hear cries omit from the monitor.
        I set a timer on my phone for the pasta and run up to my distressed baby. "Hey hey, it's okay mama is here" I say to the crying girl. She clings to me covered in sweat, I begin to think she had a nightmare. She latched on through my shirt, shaking vigorously. She screams when I unlatch her to pull my shirt up but settles when my nipple comes to view. She suckles aggressively while I carry her down to the kitchen. I finish the pasta and carry her to her room for her to finish nursing in the rocking chair.
      She nurses as I rock back and forth soothingly, only calming once's she drains both my breasts. She looks up at me sucking my empty breast, it must have been one scary dream. "I'm sorry you had a bad dream pumpkin" I hum caressing her face gently.
     She unlatched and I help her burp before getting her changed into a new onesie and carrying her down to the kitchen. She clings to my front, laying her head on my chest. I sit at the table with her on my lap knowing she will be distraught if I detach her from my body. I got one bowl of pasta and eat some, after I take a few bites she turns her head to it and looks at it sideways. I chuckle and put a singular pasta on my fork and let her try it. She mushes it between her teeth and smiles at me clapping her hands. Our lunch continues like this as I keep feeding her half of the bowl I fixed for us.
      The rest of the day is spent with Ellie doing tummy time in front of sesame street and then taking a nap on her play mat with Lars laid next to her.
     I take a picture of the two cuddling and sit on the couch to return some emails.
                         •••••••*•*•••••••
         It's dinner time and Ellie won't eat anything I made. I tried giving her bites of the grilled chicken, the steamed carrots, and the broccoli. She turned her head at everything. I warm up a protein shake in a bottle and try to feed her at least this but she refuses it as well. I can't let her not eat anything before bed but I also can't force her to eat.
       She cries and pulls my shirt and I finally give in and let her nurse. She drinks fast and hungrily making me frown. She nurses until my milk is gone and stares up at me with big eyes. I kiss her head and notice she feels a bit warm to the touch. I try not to over worry but I start to overthink.
         Ellie is asleep once again in my arms, I rock her for a bit before I place her paci in her mouth and lay her in her crib. I return to the kitchen and finish my dinner that's turned cold. I sigh while cleaning the dishes hoping Ellie isn't getting sick, she's still malnourished and is too susceptible to being hospitalized.
        I try to calm my worries while watching tv with Lars when I hear Ellie wailing from the baby monitor. I run to her side when I see the throw up beside her. I gasp and lift her up, she hiccups and whines, I get her undressed and go to change her diaper when I notice a rash all over her body. I instantly get worried and make quick work of getting her diaper changed. Her diaper was such a mess I decided to just take her to the bath, she wouldn't let me put her in alone so I join her. I get her clean before we exit the bath rather quickly, I lotion her as fast as possible so I can get her diapered before she makes another mess.
        I check her temperature and it's 100.1, I sigh and get her some Children's medicine to help reduce her fever. I decide against a new onesie and just wrap her in a blanket before bringing her to bed with me, she crawls onto my chest and lazily snakes her hand up my shirt to play with my right nipple, making milk beads out around it. I pull my shirt off and help her latch on as she sleepily drinks, falling asleep before it runs out.
      I replace my nipple with her paci but leave my shirt off. I decide since her onesie is off tonight she could use the extra comfort of skin to skin with me. Once the blanket is covering us both she moves slightly so she's covering my entire body with hers. I rub her back as I drift to sleep hoping my little one will feel better tomorrow.