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It's been 12 years since the night Kim Sunoo was last seen around the city. Y/N could only wish it was the alcohol that ruined his life, but she couldn't come to kill the fact that there was something else that did.
"Dumbass!" Y/N exclaimed in dismay as soon as Sunoo's arm was around her neck. He wasn't in his right mind to start a conversation with his girlfriend, let alone walk without doing it in zigzags.
His entire face was painted with a drunken red tinge, and his every breath sent out a bitter whiff that caused Y/N to squint the entire time.
"Who told you to drink, idiot?" Y/N asked as soon as they were out of the bar to sit around the playground swings, wishing Sunoo would manage to get back home sooner.
He rested his arm against his leg and placed a finger on his lips, signalling Y/N to keep her mouth shut.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" She placed her hands on Sunoo's warm face, making her palms heat up each second. His gaze looked blue rather than tired; the same one she always saw before both of them happened.
He closed his eyes and buried his face beneath his hands in which Y/N was quick enough to hold him back.
"You're going to hate me forever, Y/N." After what seemed like a constant century, Sunoo finally managed to speak.
"What do you mean?" Y/N asked, puzzled.
She watched each moment the air stole his words away from his hesitating lips and waited ever so patiently, trying to connect the dots together.
"Speak, Sunoo." She pleaded, trying not to sound desperate.
"Forgive me, Y/N." He answered.
"For what?" She asked eagerly. And just before she could lose her mind waiting, he bursted out in tears, leaning his head on Y/N's shoulder.
"I still love her. I've never stopped loving her."
And right at that moment, Y/N felt her fragile heart cave in. 'How could he live with me and still picture her as he holds my hand and kisses my lips?' She thought.
"Lie." She said mindlessly, trying to resist Sunoo's grip around her.
"I still love my ex, Y/n." He said apologetically, as though anticipating her next move.
She stood and managed to escape his hug, with her limbs freezing and tears eager to flow down her soft cheeks. "So, now I finally know." her voice was stone cold.
"I'm sorry." Were the only words Sunoo could say. He knew he could no longer mend her.
"Well, I hope you live the best life." She said, slowly taking a step away. "And I hope I'll never see you again."
As she turned away and never looked back, she could only count each step she takes until she felt further away from him, wishing she could just wash away the words she had said to him. It hurt her and she cried and prayed he would run after her and tell her he wanted her back, but she remembered there was no reason to do so.
Y/N never thought she would be spending the rest of her life regretting the day after that, knowing that his picture would be posted on every corner of every street, in hopes that he would return or be returned in an instant.
Each rumor bewildered her just as it did to everyone else. Some would say that he was last seen at the cliff, staring blankly at the harsh waves underneath it. Some would say that he decided to take his own life. But some would say that he was drunk and a group of the unknown came to take him into a van. After all, he was just a naive, intoxicated boy, finding refuge.
Y/N waited for days, for weeks, months, and years. But only the cold wind came to brush her skin, reminding her how he was alone and just as cold that night. She waited, and each time she did, she wished she hadn't said such things to him at all. She waited and she couldn't give up halfway.
After ten years of hopeless, unanswered search, Kim Sunoo's family decided that it was best to finally let him go, and perhaps still love him the same but miss him so painfully. Y/N once hoped that she could, too. But everytime she tried to think that he was gone, she was hurting even more. She yearned for an answer, even if it meant a body being found.
It's been 12 years and the wound still seemed so fresh. At least to Y/N.
The midnight was sprinkled with rain and a chilly breeze. She was back again, lighting the cinnamon-scented candles placed beside a picture frame. As everything was bright and warm, she placed her hand on the surface of the frame, particularly on Kim Sunoo's happy face.
"I'm all alone here." She said, feeling the familiar warmth welling on her eyes. She hasn't cried for a long time, and she decided that it was alright to do so now. Part of regretting was crying out painful, guilty tears, after all.
She stayed on the table and imagined every memory of him like a motion picture. She was getting old, but the reminiscence still felt youthful to her.
Then, all of a sudden, a knock was heard on the door.
It didn't happen only once. But the more she tried to ignore them, the louder the knocks came. She thought for a moment and assumed it was her troubled sibling, Jungwon.
She quickly stood and exclaimed, "Don't you dare break the door! What's your problem, you idiot—"
She froze the moment she saw who she was welcoming.
His hair was damp and skin pale. He was wearing the same shirt he wore one night. His smile was the same, sunny grin she loved to see, only that his once velvety lips were now tinted with a cold shade. The boy who mysteriously went missing...
"I'm home now, Y/N." He said, reaching for Y/N's hand. He was there, right in front of her eyes, but it felt so unreal to her.
