𝙀𝙣𝙝𝙮𝙥𝙚𝙣 𝙄𝙢𝙖𝙜𝙞𝙣𝙚𝙨 ☘

« heeseung »

:/you met a stranger in a dream

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Daylight almost planted a kiss across your face, but when Heeseung turned his head to gaze at you, the straw hat he was wearing made sure it covered you, too. It was only then you found yourself lying leisurely on his lap. No one really knew what time it was.  But you sure knew the qualia of the flaxen sun as it rose the highest, and how rich the barley field was. Thank the gods you were wearing jumpers and angel sleeves at the time. The fibers were a bother.

"War will be over soon, my darling." Hee, the farmer, muttered. "The lot of ours will double. This bureaucratic rubble will soon come to a halt. Our country will never be hungry again."

You wanted to say something. But you found yourself tongue-tied. You were not his darling; he was a stranger. That, you would like to say. You remembered the graduation pictorial. You were already ages late. You would never make it to school.

"Graduation? Pictorial? School?" He said once again, all as if he just cracked your thoughts open. "You were dreaming, darling. Would you like us to head home and make possum pies instead?"

Your eyes were open, revealing the warm sun rising at its highest. Heeseung was there, suddenly turning his gaze at you with a rose-colored smile. He was wearing a straw hat, partly covering your face from the sun. The barley field was rich, now that the bombing was put to a stop for a time.

You wanted to say something. But you found yourself tongue-tied. You woke up from a dream. Or so you thought. You closed your eyes again, longing for the real morning that awaited you.

"Graduation? Pictorial? School?" He said once again, all as if he just cracked your thoughts open. "You were dreaming, darling. Would you like us to head home and make lemon cakes instead?"

So that's what it felt to be imprisoned in the same face of a multitude of dreams. You almost forgot he was not really there. You weren't really there.

You reached for the smudge on his cheek, gently rubbing your fingers on his skin. You weren't quite certain about how the touch felt. But it was just as if holding the clouds. And so he turned to face you, his smile wide enough as he leaned closer to plant a kiss on your forehead. 

"I have to go." You almost heard yourself say, earning no reply. Hee then got up, dusting off his pants, then offering a hand for you to hold as you walked through the supple land.

By then, the sky looked as if it was just about to fall, you could tell by how the pale blue's and the  grey's from the bombing clashed. In a blink of an eye, the grass was replaced with bones burnt to the crisp. You would never really know the next thing you would see. But for the most of it, you'd only have Hee along the way with the same silly smile.

"I have to go." It was such a meek mutter. Wake up. You kept telling yourself. Wake up. But when you closed your eyes just to open them again, you kept coming back to the endless trail of barleys. You weren't even certain about them now. They were a rubble a while ago.

"I'm having such a wonderful time with you, y/n." He said, this time, taking off his hat and placing it on your head, then gently patting you. "I sometimes wish we'd stay just like this forever." He said, almost as if it was a threat. Almost as if he truly wanted you to stay. Even his clasp on your hands tightened by then. You tried to let go. You promised you did.

"I'm not here." You said. Crazy, the way it sounded. But you felt the need to say it there, now that the world—his world— was starting to be filled with ashes and dead people. Dead fields. Dead everything.

"I'm not here." You raised your voice this time. But then again, you could scream to your heart's content. You could try to let go from his mews. You can even write a thousand prayers on your bare skin. But that place was still not yours. Your strength was all an illusion. So sink. Sink. Sink.

"Don't leave me." Hee said upon gazing into your coffee-colored orbs. He knew. "Please. We can stay here. Just you and me. It should always be that way."

"But I need to wake up."

"But then, you're going to lose this place. Our home. Me."

You lips were shut, finding yourself gingerly caressing the grass in your palm. You closed your eyes. You were always meant to do so.

"Please don't do this. I don't want to disappear. Y/n. Please."

You took a deep breath. Wake up. Wake up.

"You'll kill me."

"I don't want to disappear."

I don't want to—