The Love Story of God & Me

Chapter Ten: Take me to Church

Kate headed me towards their church. It was big, with many saints made up of wood and steel. I suddenly feel that she slowly take off her hands on mine.

"This is where we worship you Lord" she said.

"Really? this is crazy you know, I'm not here to buy anything that you will say" I said while looking at her horridly.

"You know what, you're so bitter Phaul! even if you don't have faith like me, you should also learn to respect other people's belief" she said.

"Yeah I know but I'm not like you Okay, I don't have faith, I'm a God myself, I don't believe in your Imaginary , non existing friend, it's a hoax, he is a hoax,period!" I said.

Instead of arguing with me, she headed me to sit in the pews.

"Come, here..." she said.

I saw a big cross at their altar, this is not new to me, Isaiah and I visited churches everywhere but he never open up or say something about his church, Mom and Dad introduce me to their imaginary friend but it's odd because I'm not interested, I mean never.

Isaiah also knew that if he start preaching on me, I will never listen to him but I don't know why I listen to Kate. This is complete nonsense.This day is a joke.

While sitting, I saw her facing the Cross, her face was so lovely but I got the courage to ask her about their belief.

"Can I ask you something?" I said...

"Yeah, ask me now and I will answer.." she said

"Why do you have so many Saints? I mean you have a God right? so are you putting also your faith on things that are manmade? it's just nonsense to see people devoting theirselves on things that can't talk... I'd rather talk to myself than waste my time on those s***" I rudely asked.

She met my gaze, her lovely face I saw fades, she seriously looked at me.

"You know what, even if our church has many man made saints, my FAITH doesn't lie in them, my faith lies only to JESUS alone..."
she said.

She stared at the cross again.

"I think that is one of the things that I notice these days, some people came here to Church and they Pray for the saints instead of praying directly to God, for me those statues you see who are replicate only of saints are just reminders, they are not God but their stories inspired me and other Christians out there, they write what they heard from God through the Bible, they are messengers, prophets, disciples of God. I know in myself the truth, I'm not saying I'm against our church but it's one thing I want to pinpoint to people, to worship JESUS CHRIST alone, my faith does not lie in the rosaries, in saints, in fortune tellers, but in JESUS alone, did you get me?" she said and she looked at me again.

Her answer was quite long, I didn't see it coming but yeah she has a point, but I don't care about her Imaginary friend, for me he is not real, a fantasy, a fictional character.

"Okay.." I replied

I want to tell her I want to go home but she continued speaking, I think this is going to be a sharing of life story part.

"Uhm, you know what Phaul, the first time I saw you, I thought you were so very rude, but I know that you are a good person inside" she said.

Me? Good, haha, I don't think so.

"Really, and the first time I met you, you look like weak, I mean, you're face is very lovely but you always look pale, if Dr. Matthew didn't tell me about your condition, I may never know about your sickness..." I said.

She looked down the floor. She looked so depressed again. I don't know what made her so lonely, did I say something not nice? Her smile faded.

"Hey, did I say something wrong? I don't like to see you frowning, its odd to see a lovely face very gloomy" I said.

"Can I open up to you Phaul?" she said, her face still in great turmoil.

What did she say?

"Uhm, about what?"

"Can I trust you?" she asked.

"Yeah, sure... and I promise I can keep a secret Kate" I said.

"I am an orphan Phaul, you know that right?" she said.

"And then?" I replied.

"Even if I never knew my parents, even if they abandon me, I never blamed God for everything that happened in my life, because I know in my heart that I have a purpose..." she said.

I don't know what kind of drama Kate is telling me but she's serious about sharing her life to me.

"Can I open up to you also Kate?" I asked.

Kate looked at me and smiled, "Yes, ofcourse" she replied.

"When I was a child... I saw my Dad kill my Mom..." I said,

"Uhm I'm sorry to hear that Phaul, is that the reason why you blamed God?" she asked.

"Yes , but not only that, if your God really exist why didn't he saved my parents? why didn't he allow me to suffer like this? why? I have a lot of why's in my head Kate, and you cannot blame me for blaming your God, he didn't do anything, if he really exist why can't we see him now? how can you believe in a God you don't see? that's nonsense you know!" I said.

Kate looked at me with a sad expression in her eyes and started talking...

"I may not have the power to answer your questions Phaul but everything has a purpose in life, looked at me, I may not be able to meet my parents but I want them to know how much I love them.." she said.

"Sorry to hear your story Kate, and I'm sorry if you have to hear all of my been throughs..." I said.

"No it's okay, I can feel your pain too,were all in this together, besides to see is not always to believe, to have faith is to believe, and Yes I cannot blame you for blaming God but in my case, I didn't go bitter towards him because I know when my parents leave me, they have reasons, God has a reason Phaul, sometimes I doubt him but doubting him is like saying "I DON'T TRUST HIM AT ALL", doubting His plans for me make me fall into Sin.." she shared.

She's really a hard core Christian, I cannot blame her for that.

"It's just ironic between the two us, I share my God through social media and you bash him all around, I know Phaul that someday you will encounter God, I mean just like me, I encountered him everyday but its just me playing deaf before , I realize how selfish, bitter, arrogant, vain I am before but when he came to me, he changed me for good, he uses my mess to be a message to everyone, life is not always easy but if you have God in your life, the journey is all worth it." she said.