~
"Will I d-do that again?" She asked quietly as he grabbed a new wipe.
"Yes." He nodded, wiping down her forehead.
"A lot?" She questioned, swallowing thickly.
"Yes." He repeated. "What are you thinking?"
"W-whether to do it or not." She sniffle...
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☆*:.｡. o(▽)o .｡.:*☆
(Warnings: hinted sex with an underage person, self-harm kind of, suicidal thoughts, Nova hates herself so that's fun, drugging. Don't read if you're uncomfortable.)
Sitting at the edge of her too-soft bed, Nova inhaled deeply, fingers messing with her lily flower necklace. In half an hour, she was supposed to be meeting up with Andy Samuelson at his room where he was waiting for her. She didn't want to go there, though, she wanted to be back with Jenny or Winter, not at some man's hotel room where he was potentially waiting to take the last sliver of innocence she had left from her.
Taking a final deep breath, Nova pulled her long coat over her shoulders, running a hand through her long hair. Making her way to the door, she pulled it open and started down the corridor to an elevator. After pressing the button to his floor, the top floor, it started to go up and she contemplated slitting her thigh open to take her tracker out and flee. However, she knew someone from the Red Room would be close no matter how much they trusted her with her missions.
As she walked down the hallway, a man was standing outside of his room, a woman in front of him in heavy, dark makeup. They were speaking in hushed voices, their eyes following Nova with caution as if she was going to tell someone that they were talking in a hallway. Instead, she carried on walking until she knocked on Andy's door. He opened it a few seconds later.
"Hey, Sydney." Andy smirked and she returned it confidently.
"Hi, Andy." She greeted, inhaling sharply when he grabbed her wrist, pulling her inside and closing the door after glancing outside for people. "Where's your pool?"
"This way, sweetheart." Andy grinned, placing a hand on the small of her back, gently leading her to the outside, balcony pool.
"The view is beautiful." Nova muttered with a smile, genuinely meaning what she said as she looked at all of the lights around the city that lit up the tall building.
"It is." Andy agreed, pulling off his shirt and trousers before jumping into the pool, looking at Nova when he came back up. "You coming in the pool or are you just gonna stand there?"
"I'm coming in." Nova smiled falsely, pulling off her coat and watching Andy smirk at her naked form. She then jumped in, pushing her hair back as she came back up. "You have the best view of the city up here. You're lucky. My room just watches cars go past."
"I could request to get you moved." Andy offered, swimming closer to her. "It'd be easy."
"Oh, no, that's fine. I enjoy watching cars go past. I like to play Yellow Car with myself." Nova joked, stiffening when his hands grabbed her waist.
"You could always stay in my room." Andy offered. "Bed's big, bathroom's big, pool's big..."
"I'd like that." Nova lied smoothly, hoping the water shielded her body enough that he could only see the outline of her.
-
Snores sounded in Andy's room, Nova sat at the end of his bed just staring at the bathroom door, a blanket wrapped tightly around her bare body. Her mission was far from over with Andy but she had never wished she could just kill someone as much as she did at this point. While he slept soundly, Nova was going to be awake for the whole night. She didn't know if she could sleep again after that evening.
Getting up slowly and quietly, Nova made her way to the bathroom, opening and closing the door silently, not wanting to wake the sleeping target. Reaching over, she turned on the shower which wasn't loud enough to wake him apparently because she heard him snoring still. Dropping the blanket, she got into the shower, warm water hitting her skin for once.
With the water beating down on her, Nova sank down to the floor, sitting with her back down to the wall. Feeling like she couldn't breath at all, her nails started to scratch on her hand, the sin rubbing off, her flesh getting rough and red. Throat tight and constricted, she continued to scratch her hand until it bleed, panic running through her. She felt so, so dirty.
She could only hope that it would all end soon. Not even with someone finding the Red Room and taking it down, she was beginning to think death would be the best option for her. She wished it would happen quick and unexpected. She'd be free at least. Maybe she wouldn't be able to do anything but she'd be free of everything.
It was sad to think that as a teenager, what she wanted most was death. The sweet relief of darkness. Limbs limp and rotting, but dead, you wouldn't know. You wouldn't know anything apart from that you were dead. It would be over. Pain, suffering, horrifying memories and the need to be perfect would be gone.
Nova flinched when the bathroom door opened, standing up as speedily as she could so it seemed she was just showering. From the doorway, Andy watched her with furrowed eyebrows, his eyes scanning the bruises and marks he'd left on her soft skin, one hand behind his back.
"Sorry if I woke you." Nova apologised, back turned to him when he stepped into the shower.
"It's fine." Andy stated, one hand moving to her shoulder. "I don't mind. I just hope you're not going anywhere."
"No, I'm staying here." Nova mumbled, closing her eyes.
"Yes, you are." Andy said, voice stern and her eyebrows furrowed, going to spin around but something pricked her neck. "You're staying with me."
"What the fuck did you do?" Nova asked, her voice slurring as she span to him, feet slipping but she was grabbed by him before she could fall. "Wha... What did you give me?"
"Sh, sh, just go to sleep." Andy shushed. "You'll be fine."
"Let me... me go..." Nova trailed off, eyes falling shut and her body limping in his arms, Andy smirking down at her in achievement.
