Innocent Lust

Parenting

Emerson and I go through the clothes and decide what he likes and doesn't like. After this whole time of being here he still hasn't said much. He hasn't even smiled either.

The house is quiet because Sage kicked out all the men. It's just us, Beck, Emerson, and the old guy. Oh and the doctors taking care of the old guy.

I haven't had a chance to talk to him because I have been busy with Emerson.

Just as we are finishing up going through the clothes and deciding what else he will need, we hear the front door burst open.

"No. You're wrong. I'm older and wiser so I am right," I hear Marcus say in his always annoyed voice.

"That can't be your only argument for why you are right about everything. You have to have an actual reason," Carmelo says back to him.

I turn to Emerson, "Do you want to meet Uncle Carmelo and Grandpa Marcus?"

He shakes his head no.

I had Beck do some research on Emerson. His parents were killed. He has no other family. Emerson already seemed to know this when we told him though.

"Okay. You can just stay in here then. I will make sure to have someone get you toys. I am going to go with Uncle Carmelo and Grandpa Marcus," I get up and walk out.

"Wait," his little voice says as he gets up and runs after me.

He is now wearing a blue shirt and little grey sweatpants.

He reaches his arms up in the air. I pick him up, holding him on my hip.

"Changed your mind huh?" I smile at him and laugh a little.

I walk down the hall and stand over the balcony looking at the main entrance.

"Finally come to visit?" I smile at the two of them who pause their bickering.

"Now, I know it feels like forever," Carmelo starts, "But it most certainly hasn't been over a year. Let alone nine months."

They both look almost scared as they see me holding Emerson.

"Emerson," I look at Emerson who's head is tucked in my shoulder, "This is Uncle Carmelo," Carmelo waves, "And Grandpa Marcus," Marcus sticks his cane up in the air.

"This is Emerson. We saved him from the American base."

"You scared me," Marcus sits down as if I almost gave him a heart attack.

"It's so good to see you guys," I smile and basically run down the stairs to them.

I set Emerson down as I hug the both of them. Carmelo hugs me back but Marcus pretends to hate the hug. I know he doesn't.

I turn to see Emerson wave at Marcus.

Aw. They are going to be best friends.

"Let's eat dinner," Carmelo says, "I already ordered pizza. It should be here-"

The doorbell rings.

"Now."

***

We all eat pizza together. We talk and laugh and tell stories. Emerson is quiet the whole time. Sage is in bed on bed rest.

"Emerson you want to play a game?" Marcus asks.

Emerson nods his head.

"Let's go."

They go to the table and begin to play a game.

"I am going to check on Sage. I will be back, okay?" I say to Emerson.

He looks at me with a fear, begging me to stay.

I internally sigh. Why is he so cute?

I watch the three of them play until Emerson can barely keep his head up.

"Alright, I think it's bed time for Emerson," I whisper as I pick him up and carry him upstairs.

By the time we are in his room he is fast asleep in my arms. I lay him down in his bed and tuck him in.

I kiss his forehead and whisper goodnight to him.

I close the door and lock it from the inside so no one can go in there. Unless Emerson lets them in.

I head to my room to check on Sage.

When I open the door he is asleep with his back turned towards me. I smile and close the door.

Finally, I head back downstairs to Carmelo and Marcus.

"Thank you for coming! I am so happy to finally see you guys again," I smile at them.

"Well, we gotta go now. We have a mafia to help take care of," Carmelo winks at me.

"Yeah, your mafia," Marcus rolls his eyes as he stands up.

"Visit again soon!"

They head out the door and leave.

The house in very quiet and empty now. It's just me. Sage and Emerson are asleep. The old guy was moved to a base earlier today. Beck has probably gone home by now.

I haven't had a lot of time to really think in the past few days. I have managed to keep myself busy.

I feel the weight of everything start to crumble in on me.

Sage almost died.

My mother did die.

My father is dying.

I have a mafia to take care of until Sage is better.

I have a child to take care of.

I have Sage to take care of.

I curl up on the floor of the kitchen where Carmelo and Marcus left me and cry.

I cry for my mother who had an unfair death. I cry because I don't have my mothers arms to cry into. I cry because by the time I get to visit my father again he will probably already be dead. I cry because of how stressed and angry and scared I am right now.

I cry because I feel so alone without my mother.