Desperate Desire

6. Car Share

Jade POV

As I place the rest of my stuff in my case I steal a quick glance at Trevor, he looks up at me gives me a beautiful smile and then goes  back to packing his stuff.

He was being his usual happy, smiling, affectionate self with no clue that last night my naked body had been wrapped around another man, while I was riddled with guilt.

Yet when I thought about Roman all I could do was smile, how was it possible that something could make me feel happy an guilty at the same time? Maybe this was my punishment for letting it happen in the first place.

"You ready to go baby?" Trevor asks before lifting my case off the bed

"Yeah all set" I smile, I was desperate to get in that car and out some distance between Roman and I, I was determined to stick to my word, it would not happen again.

I follow Trevor our of our room and out of the hotel, it's not long before I noticed the others standing by the car and realise we won't be traveling alone.

"Baby what's going on?" I ask taking hold of his hand

"We decided to car share to cut down costs" he says "don't worry they are all good guys, you'll be fine"

"Wait a second that is a five seater car and there are six of us" I say doing a quick head count

"Hey guys, so whose in our car?" Trevor asks as he opens the trunk

"All of us" one of the guys say "we have an extra one, Jimmy is traveling with Naomi so Jey is with us"

"We can't fit six in this car though" Trevor sighs

"I have room for one in my car" an all to familiar voice says causing me to freeze to the spot

"Thanks man" Trevor smiles "baby why don't you ride with Roman, you know him and it will be better than being squashed in a car full of guys"

"Trevor I don't..........."

"Come on you'll be perfectly safe, plus Roman does over night stops so you won't have to be in the car all night" he says "it's just until tomorrow morning, I'll see you at the hotel"

"So that's it, you just palm me off with him just like that?" I gasp and he wraps his arms around me and kisses the side of my head

"I know it's not ideal but your the only one who isn't required to be at the venue" he says "I can't leave Jey stranded"

"I really don't think it's a good idea" I say clinging onto his arm "can't Jey go with Roman"

"I promise you'll be safe" he says pecking my lips "I love you beautiful and I'll see you soon"

With that he turns from me and gets in the car, I stand there and watch as the car pulls away and leaves me here with Roman standing right behind me. Me and Roman alone was a bad idea, me and Roman staying somewhere overnight alone was an even worse idea and yet here I am with no way out of it.

"I'll put your bags in the car" he says quietly as I stand there looking at the parking lot doorway my boyfriend just drove out of.

After a moment I follow Roman over to the car but I can't look at him, I know that if I do I'm screwed both literally and figuratively.

"After you" he says opening the car door for me and I get into the passenger side seat "I'm not going to do anything you don't want me to babygirl, I know your not happy about this so if you don't want to talk to me that's fine"

He closes the door and I close my eyes and let out the breath I've been holding, it's clear that my silence and my attempt to get out fo this is bothering him, I don't want to hurt him, I don't want to hurt anyone, this is such a mess.

As we set off Roman explains to me that we will do half the journey tonight and the rest in the morning. We do the journey in relative silence mainly becuase I don't know what to say to him, it's not like our interactions involve much talking.

He pulls of the road into the car park of a motel, he parks up turns off the engine and sighs before looking at me.

"Your not the only one who feels guilty" he says "he's my friend and I don't like that I'm doing this to him but I also can't help how I feel" he says before getting out of the car.

I do the same and after he gets our bags I follow him into the motel, we walk up to the desk and the receptionist greets us with a smile.

"Good evening one room or two?" She asks

"Tw......"

"One" I say cutting him off and he just looks at me "one room please" I say

"Are you sure?" He asks "you can have your own room"

"I've never been able to sleep alone in strange places" I say "so if it's ok with you I'd like to share a room with you"

"Of course it's ok with me" he says subtly taking hold of my hand and playing with my fingers. Once we are checked in we walk to our room still holding hands. He puts our bags down and with his free hand unlocks the door.

He picks up our bags and leads me into the room, he places our bags on the bed and then walks back over to me. He takes my hands in his and looks deep into my eyes, he closes the gap leans down and I turn my head.

He gently takes hold of my chin and turns my face back to look at him, he runs his thumb over my lips and looks into my eyes.

"Tell me you don't want me babygirl" he says in an almost whisper "look me in the eye and tell me you don't want me"

"I....I can't" I sigh "you know I do"

"Then let me feel those lips on mine" he says pulling me closer "kiss me babygirl"

Without a moments hesitation I lean up and press my lips to his, he let's out a soft sigh as he wraps his arms around me, once again I'm lost in him and the only thing I know for sure is I'm in trouble.