Unrelated Undertale Multiverse Oneshots

Nightmare's Girl Scouts

This oneshot was requested by Allura_Writes on Ao3!

Before we get into it, this is going to have some made-up characters (they will be named, since not everyone can be anonymous in a girl scout troop), because I think Toriels are a lil' too old to be girl scouts...ya know, maybe we can get Littletale Tori here..yeah, she'll be here.

Littletale was made by mudkipful.

I've never been a girl scout, btw, so this is probably not going to be accurate. I mean, it's Nightmare in charge of girl scouts. It was never going to be accurate in the first place.

Comments are welcome and appreciated!

Please enjoy!

~~~~~

It was a beautiful day outside. Birds were singing, flowers were blooming, and no one was coming to the door, just how Sans liked it. Papyrus had officially endorsed his "lazy day" on account of the fact that he had won the nacho-eating contest last night, and Sans intended to stay on the couch all day...until the doorbell rang. Sans didn't move, hoping that whoever was at the door would leave soon. The doorbell rang again, and Sans made no move to walk to the door. The doorbell rang again. And again. After two minutes of intermittent ringing, the person at the door began to repeatedly press the doorbell over and over, effectively filling the entire house with the noise of bells. That wasn't good for a lazy day, and Sans decided that answering the door would have been more beneficial than being deafened by a doorbell. When he opened the door, the ringing ceased, and he was faced with a small goat monster in a..girl scout costume.

"Hello!" The tiny goat monster grinned. "Would you like to buy some girl scout cookies?"

"Oh.." Sans sighed; he had left his wallet in his bedroom, and his lazy day laws forbade going up stairs. "Sorry, kid, maybe next time."

"Sir, please buy some cookies." The child gave him a pleading face.

"No, thank you. Try next door." Sans began to close the door, but a small foot stopped the door from closing.

"Sir, the money you give us will go to very worthy causes!" The child pushed the door back open.

"I'm not interested in cookies today, sorry." Sans shook his skull.

The small goat pulled out a knife and pointed it at the adult. "Buy the cookies."

"..." Sans stared at the sharp blade. "How much are the mint ones?"

With a completed sale, the small goat left the house happily, placing the gold coins in a bag with the rest of her earnings for the day. That had been her last house, and now she could meet the others in the park! They were at the playground, using the outdoor equipment gleefully, and their troop leader was sitting on a bench, overlooking them. She approached the adult, pulling out her bag of gold to show him.

"Mister Nightmare!" She called, smiling as she ran over. "I'm done my block!"

"Ah, how did it go?" Nightmare wondered. 

"Great! I only had to threaten people three times, and I only had to maim one!"

"That's an improvement!" Nightmare chuckled, patting the child on the back. "I see you made a nice profit, too." 

"Yep! Can I go play now?"

"Sure."

"Yay!"

As the little girl ran to the playground to play her friends, Nightmare kept a close watch on the children. Many years ago, he never would have even considered leading a scout troop, since he was a tyrannical king of negativity, but..many things had happened to make him change his mind. When he had found his four boys, they had been suffering in various ways, locked in resets and losing hope. His four girls hadn't been much different. The oldest, a ten-year-old human child, had been abandoned by her parents when he had found her and took her home; she had taken the name Luna after he had taken her in. The second oldest was eight years old, a dog monster that had once been the child of a Dogamy and a Doggaressa; her parents had been corrupted when her AU was attacked by some code-altering villains, and Nightmare had once again taken a child in. She was known as Doggarina. The third was seven years old, a bird monster named Breeze who had been shunned for her inability to fly; Nightmare had taken her in after seeing her poor treatment. The youngest was four years old, a Toriel who had lived through the destruction of her home universe, a Littletale Copy. Her name, after much consideration (four year olds had way too many name ideas to choose from, and half of them were foods), was Tilly. 

The only problem was that, in the beginning, Nightmare had no clue how to raise children; that had begun a week-long study on how little girls lived their lives, and by the end of it, Nightmare had a bit more understanding than he had initially had. Many of the little girls he had stalked had dressed up in uniforms and sold cookies, and he assumed that it was traditional, therefore, he had to have his little girls do it, too; Horror's cookies were better than the ones the other little girls sold, anyway, and the world would thank him and his girls later. The girls seemed to enjoy it, in any case, and he had even been able to show them how to properly market a product (customers were much more likely to purchase cookies at knifepoint, and there was almost a guarantee if they were injured). His girls seemed to like it, and that was all that mattered to him. 

After an hour at the park, it was time for Nightmare to take his girls into the forest for their monthly camping trip, where they would tell scary stories, roast marshmallows, and sleep in sleeping bags. Nightmare had seen other little girls enjoy camping, and his did, too; that was good enough for him. When they reached their usual camping spot, they set up their camping site and sat around a fire as the moon began to rise. 

"Scary stories, anyone?" Nightmare offered the chance to tell a frightening tale to his girls.

"I have one!" Breeze spoke up. "Once upon a time, in a dark and scary haunted house, a family was eating dinner. All of a sudden, the salt and pepper shakers began to get up and walk, and the family was so scared that they ran away! The end!"

"That's not scary!" Luna rolled her eyes.

"Yes, it is!" Breeze refuted.

"Girls, everyone has a different idea of what scary is." Nightmare reminded. "Would anyone like a s'more?"

"Me!" Tilly accepted a s'more. "Thank you!"

"Of course."

"Got bones?" Doggarina hoped.

"Yes, I have some bones." Nightmare tossed a bone to the girl, who happily chewed on it. 

A few more scary stories were told before Nightmare decided that it was time for bed, and when he did, his girls were tired enough to accept it.

"You all have pleasant dreams, now; there will be more cookies to sell and people to threaten tomorrow."

"We will!" Luna nodded, snuggling into her sleeping bag.

"Night, night, Nightmare!" Tilly hugged a teddy bear.

"Good night, little one." Nightmare smiled, watching his little girls fall asleep.

He wondered how many cookies they were supposed to sell in their lifetimes, though..