Second Chances [BxB]

thirteen

Declan was drunk. He was raw, and tender, and lacking the armour that kept him safe. He felt vulnerable, and exposed, and excruciatingly alone. The alcohol hadn't numbed the pain as he had hoped it would - he could still hear his Mother's words echoing through his head, he could still hear Sebastian's pleas for him to see a doctor, he could still hear the concern in Mickey's voice, and the tremble in his own.

He was slouched lazily against the bar, nursing a drink he hardly remembered ordering. He knew he needed to stop drinking. But he couldn't - not until he was numb, and blurry around the edges, and couldn't hear his own thoughts anymore. He would stop then.

Evan was preoccupied; he was flirting with a stranger who kept buying him shots, and touching Evan's arm. Declan was watching them from a distance, refusing to take his eyes off of Evan's drink, in case something was slipped into it.

"You look miserable." Harvey teased, slipping onto a barstool next to Declan.

Declan groaned, propping his elbows up on the bar, and dropping his face into his hands. He didn't turn to look at Harvey; he was too busy watching Evan's drink from across the bar.

"What's wrong?" Harvey sighed.

Declan merely shrugged, and took a sip from his glass. He was so drunk, he could barely taste the vodka anymore. "Where's Seb?" He mumbled into his drink.

Harvey rose his brows, "Relax, lover boy, he's not far." He laughed, "He's been keeping an eye on you all night; ready to jump up and catch you if you fall out of your seat, which..." Harvey placed a hand on the back of Declan's chair, and pushed it down so all four legs touched the ground, "Stop leaning back on this thing, yeah?"

"I miss him."

Harvey smiled sympathetically, "Why do you two keep fooling yourselves with this no-strings-attached bullshit?"

Declan pulled at his ring, twisting it around his finger restlessly, "Seb only wants me for sex."

"God, you're as stupid as he is." He shook his head incredulously.

"Seb's not stupid." Declan murmured, "He made me pancakes."

Harvey chuckled, "Ah, yes, that well-known difficult recipe; pancakes."

Declan scowled at him, "Stop it."

"Come join us." Harvey offered.

"Can't." Declan shook his head, "Keeping an eye on Evan."

Harvey followed Declan's gaze, and his lips curled up at the corners, "That's your friend over there? With the blond hair?" He asked, and Declan nodded, "That's Calvin he's with - he works with me and Seb. He's harmless."

Declan didn't dare rip his gaze away, "Don't trust you." He murmured back, "Don't trust him."

"Why not?" Harvey frowned, "He's really-"

"I don't care how nice he is." Declan cut him off, "Nice guys can still spike people."

Harvey scoffed, "Clavin's not gonna-"

"I don't care." Declan repeated sharply.

Harvey didn't push him again. He just sat there in silence, his eyes boring into the side of Declan's head, studying him, attempting to read him.

"Stop doing that." Declan grumbled, distractedly mixing his drink with his straw, watching the ice rattle around the glass.

"Do you want some water?" Harvey offered.

Declan shook his head.

"Something to eat?"

"You sound like Seb." Despite everything, Declan found himself smiling at the taste of Sebastian's name in his mouth. "He's always offering me things."