Y/N The Goddess Of Power

Chapter Twenty Nine

A few days later

You and Nat decided to spend the day together, and since Steve had a bunch of meetings you were less distracted and left the house.

"When did you learn how to drive? I thought you lived in space", a question Nat asked 20 minutes into the car ride.

You laughed, "A few years back. I came here with Thor, and he was busy with you guys. I was bored ,so I just did it."

"You learnt how to drive because you was bored?" 

"Pretty much, I wanted to see what normal people did", you replied.

"Does Steve know you're going to crash his car?", Nat teased.

You roll your eyes and laugh, "I am not going to crash his car."

Nat laughs unconvinced.

"Besides, Steve has seen me drive, if he thought I was going to crash it, he wouldn't have let me take his car."

"Fair enough. Speaking of Steve, how are things between you two?", she asks.

You shake your head slightly, "Fine, I guess." 

"Didn't think you two would get into a relationship.", she teased.

Your eyes widened, "No. no." You glare at her, "We're not in a relationship." 

She smiles at your reaction.

"We're just..." 

"Fonduing?", she finishes the sentence.

You scrunch your eyebrows together, "I'm sorry what?" 

She laughs.

"Don't laugh, tell me. What does cheese and bread have to do with this?" 

"Back in the 40's Steve mistook fonduing as another meaning.", she replied.

Eyebrows still scrunched together you continued driving, confused.

"Give it a minute, and you'll get it." 

You think for a minute and your eyes widen, "Oh my god." 

"Quicker than I expected.", she laughs.

"So going to tease him about that one.", you joke.

She squints her eyes at you, "Are you sure you guys aren't together?" 

You sigh, "I know it's something Steve wants, but I can't do it." 

"Why not? You deserve to be happy." 

"Because of Bucky." You reply.

Nat just looks at you.

You take a deep breath, "That man was my world, he kept me sane in the darkest and weirdest of times. I don't think I could never love anyone as much as I love him. Steve's great, but I don't think I could make him as happy if I wasn't full on bored, and that's not fair to him." 

"So he's just a distraction?", Nat asked.

"Does it make me a bad person if I say yes?", you reply.

"I don't think so, I think both of you are doing the same thing." 

"And what is that?", you ask.

"Distracting yourselves from the pain of losing Bucky, and both you and Steve were the closest things to him, it's just a little reminder that he was real, and you feel like Steve is the only one to get it."

You keep facing the road, a tear runs down your face.

"You're right.", you quickly wipe the tear away. "I miss him so much, it physically hurts."