𝘽𝙞𝙧𝙙𝙞𝙚 // 𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝘽𝙤𝙮𝙯 ✔

𝟮𝟮 • 𝗡𝗢𝗧 𝗟𝗘𝗧𝗧𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗬𝗢𝗨 𝗚𝗢

♤han chaewon♤

3 days later, most of the guys were now completely avoiding me. they were probably scared about sangyeon because he got angry at eric and chanhee. of course the cameras... yet, these two were staying with me most of the time. i could see in the others' eyes that they still wanted to talk to me, but after what happened, they didn't want to provoke their leader more.

eric had brought me to his training room. he was currently training with sunwoo and changmin because even if he was a kidnapper, he, of course, still had to know how to fight. i was sitting in the corner of the room, which was filled with grunts from the 3 male. i was doing nothing, just staring at the floor without any gestures.

"chaewon." changmin called out. i lifted my head to notice that there wasn't sunwoo and eric anymore.

"where are the others?" i asked, frowning as i processed to stand up. he put one of his hands in his pockets, walking to me to help me.

"they're out. they said that sangyeon wanted to see them." he explained and grabbed my hand hesitantly looking behind him as he lifted me up.

i nodded quickly and he put a gap between his two lips, but no sounds came out. he obviously wanted to say something, but i would never know what.

i cleared my throat and i looked at him, his eyes were piercing through mine, and i could definitely understand what was going on in his mind. i sighed and folded my arms against my chest. "you're not forced to have a discussion with me if you don't want to."

"i wasn't about to say anything anyway." he chuckled and patted his own arm. "i just... i wanted to talk with you about something though." he rubbed his nape and his hands landed on his hips.

"what is it?" i breathed in slowly, waiting for him to continue.

it took some time for him to utter what he wanted to say at first. still having his eyes looking at the door in hesitation.

"i have something in chest, i have a heart you know?" he looked at me, searching for answers but i was just staring blankly at him. anything that he was about to say, i wasn't prepared to it. "i think- no. i'm sure. you got hurt a lot by my fault, and for your own sane i should be avoiding you right now. but i'm so worried about you, chaewon. the difference here is that i won't let you get hurt this time." he said and wrapped his arms around me, now he was trying something.

he was staring at me, my body trapped against his chest but he was staying a little away so i could see his face.

"what are you doing..?" i asked, pushing him away from me but he didn't move. instead of listening to me, he took a breath and tried to not show the tears building up in his eyes. "changmin-"

"i am not letting you go." he growled and put his face into the crook of my neck for a few minutes. he breathed out heavily and i could feel his hands shaking behind my back. slowly, he moved his head to lay a quick peck on my temple. "i don't want to lose you. i let the others get close to you and you got hurt. all by my fault. you won't be hurt anymore." his voice trembled, his cheeks were red as his eyes. he stiffened abruptly and shook his head repeatedly.

i managed to get out of his grasp, he was near crying and i didn't know what to do. suddenly the door opened to sangyeon. i was relieved that he hadn't come when changmin was hugging me.

"what's happening here?" he frowned, but i couldn't answer this, i had no idea either.

"nothing hyung! go away!" changmin turned to him, but the older one noticed the tears and i knew that he wouldn't do as he said until he got the truth.

sangyeon walked to him as i stepped back.

♤ji changmin♤

when sangyeon walked up to me and put his hand on my shoulder to shake it slightly, i broke into tears. i couldn't tell him anything. or i didn't want to. i knew what haknyeon went through.

"changmin. you can talk to me. i promise." he said truthfully, pulling me in his arms. i didn't want him to be mad at me, either at chaewon.

"you can't understand!" i shouted at the top of my lungs. i turned my head to chaewon, she was looking at me with her scared eyes.

i was so pathetic. and i hoped she wasn't scared of me, it was all that mattered.

"i can changmin. if i'm the leader, that's because there is a reason. i'm able to listen to you. is... is it chaewon?" i felt his head tilt when he realized who i was looking at.

"i just want her to be safe.. i keep feeling bad for her and i just know that i'm wrong- fuck please don't do anything t-to me.. i can't even.. control it." i confessed and hid my face on his shoulder, his warm arms patting my back.

a silence followed, and then, sangyeon decided to bring me out of the room. it had became too overwhelming to me. we were in the corridor, but, weirdly enough, he didn't seem upset at me, or even upset about the situation.

"changmin.. i understand that it's been a while since you've seen a woman, but you have to control it. you have to. i can always find you someone to-" he started but i cut him off.

"it's not about that! idon't want a one-night thing! i also don't want to meet someone new. i don't even want someone. but why do you keep hurt her every single time..? don't let her get hurt..." i said, crying hopelessly.

jacob came to us, taking me in his arms too. sangyeon just looked at me. he was shocked that i had raised my voice to him.

i was so pathetic.

i feel kinda bad for him :((((

but anyway how are you guys doing?