[BL] I shouldn't have married the crown prince

Chapter 4

I was surprised to see how meticulous Cadmael was about his studies. He listened to everything I said with great focus and managed to remember everything after one only try. I was truly amazed and praised him sincerely. So this was what the brain of a true male lead looked like! I was too amazed to be jealous. (yeah, don't be jealous of your future husband)

"Why don't you listen in class?"

Cadmael didn't answer. He just looked at me and smiled broadly. I quickly pursed my lips.

"What is it?

-I'm so happy to hear that you are curious about me."

I frowned, not knowing what to say. It was true that I haven't been curious about him until now. I avoided him for 11 years and never let him get close to me. But now that he was in my class I couldn't avoid him anymore. I was truly sorry but I had to keep my distance. It was for my own good and there wasn't anything selfish in the will to live.

"School is boring.

-But you seem quite interested now that we are studying together.

-That's because you are the one doing the teaching.

-Because of me?

-Yes. You are a very good teacher, Eschyle."

My cheeks started turning red. Was I really a good teacher? I never thought about what I wanted to do after school but I kind of liked this gratifying feeling. Cadmael was watching all of my reactions so I quickly told him to get back to work and we continued until the sun went down. I started yawning which immediately drew Cadmael's attention. He looked at me and closed his book immediately:

"We should go to bed.

-Yes."

I helped him pack away our stuff and he once again accompanied me in front of my room.

"Good night."

It seemed as though Cadmael had something to say to me so I looked at him waiting patiently:

"Can we eat together tomorrow too?"

I hesitated for a bit but didn't see any reason to say no so I agreed. Cadmael smiled and left. My daily life continued like this. In the morning I ate with Cadmael and in the evening I helped him with homework. We walked to school together but never talked on the path and slowly I got used to seeing him every day. I still hid during breaks in the library but I didn't mind going home with him now.

One day as I was ready to go home, I found it strange that Cadmael wasn't waiting for me at the gate. He was always waiting for me like a little dog (put him on a leash) and I didn't understand why he wasn't there. I started worrying and immediately thought about his bullies. Even if I didn't bully Cadmael, there were other people who were jealous of his powers. They left him alone at the beginning seeing how bad he was in class and then maybe because he was with me but it was only a question of time before they came back.

I started running around school looking for him desperately. When I finally found him, he was behind the gym and had his back turned to me. I didn't see his face but there was no doubt about the person who had such a large back. I called Cadmael's name and I saw him flinch before slowly turning around:

"I'm sorry I'm late. I had a minor setback."

I came up to him happy that he was fine but quickly froze seeing his face. There wasn't a big wound but blood was clearly flowing out of his nose.

"What happened? Are you okay? Can you breathe?"

I didn't know what I was saying and wasn't even sure that I was talking. I couldn't look away from that vivid red fluid and couldn't see or hear anything else as hypnotized. I was shaking all over and felt something coming up from my stomach. I didn't have time to react when I suddenly felt something warm cover my eyes. My eyes englobed, I couldn't see the blood anymore and slowly my hearing came back to me. I didn't know what happened but could hear Cadmael from really close:

"It's alright. You are alright. Everything will be fine."

I didn't know why or how but I believed him. At that moment, I truly believed his words and slowly fell asleep in his arms. Upon waking up, I realized that I was no longer outside and was lying down on an infirmary bed. When I turned my head I immediately saw Cadmael sitting on a chair next to me. His eyes were fixated on my face and I jumped when our eyes met.

"You are awake."

I quickly tried to get up but Cadmael put a hand on my heart ,to prevent me from moving.

"Take your time."

His touch was very light and reminded me of when he comforted me earlier. I quickly glanced at his nose but there was no more blood left. I signed and closed my eyes again but didn't fall asleep.

"How long did I sleep?

-Twenty minutes."

I heard him swallowing before he said:

"Sorry.

-About what?"

He didn't answer. I decided that I owed him an apology too:

"Sorry."

Cadmael looked at me, eyes filled with curiosity. I couldn't tell him what I was apologizing for. What was I sorry about? That I fainted, that he got abused, that I changed the story? I didn't know. One thing I knew for sure was that we were both sorry:

"Sorry."

I didn't see Cadmael's expression keeping my eyes shut at all times.

"Why are you afraid of blood?"

I opened my eyes and looked at Cadmael. He didn't seem curious, his face the same unbothered as usual.

"I don't have good memories involving blood."

He didn't ask anymore and didn't reply either. I didn't know what he thought and felt uncomfortable. I got up to change the subject and he extended a hand to help me. I looked at it for a long time but didn't take it. I didn't deserve his hand.

"I will help you."

I talked without looking at him. I felt so guilty that I wanted to cry.

"You have to fight your own battles. Until you are prepared I will help you. I will teach you how to use a sword."

Waiting for his response I finally looked up and was taken aback seeing his smile. No, don't smile at me like that. Please don't. I felt so bad that he was grateful to someone like me. Please just ignore me. I am not worth it. He got bullied again and I wasn't even there. How could this young child defend himself against his bullies? I didn't know at the time that the three guys in question finished at the hospital.