[BL] I shouldn't have married the crown prince

Chapter 19

I ran after Cadmael and while leaving the cafeteria ran into Gilbert. He was laughing uncontrollably which was really not the time!

"Where did he go?

-Was that your plan, Eschyle?

-Quick tell me where he went."

Gilbert put his arm around my shoulder with a smile.

"Calm down, Eschyle. This wouldn't have worked. He would only have gotten mad if you insisted for Diana to help him. Give him some time to cool down.

-Why did you say that it wouldn't have worked?

-Cadmael really hates Diana. If you want people who hate each other to like one another, then you should start by getting them to tolerate the company of the other. You could eat together from time to time, go to the library. Small things."

But I didn't have time. The story continued without them. Every event that they missed was a huge problem. I had to make them fall in love quickly because too many things were already different. They should have fallen in love at first sight. If they spent time together it would eventually happen anyway.

Gilbert smiled and let me go:

"I see that you are not listening. You'll understand later.

-Gilbert?"

We turned around and saw Andrew a few feet away. Gilbert rolled his eyes seeing him:

"You again? The world can't be that small.

-What are you talking about?

-Nothing that concerns you."

Gilbert turned to me and saw that I was completely lost. He smiled and rubbed my head:

"He discovered everything. Sorry, I forgot to tell you. No more acting for me."

He said it as if he was talking about the weather which was even more troubling. Gilbert then left and I saw Andrew run after him. How could things get reversed? The one chasing was now the one being chased.

Andrew quickly caught up to Gilbert:

"Please give me another chance."

Gilbert couldn't take this disk anymore.

"What do you want Andrew?"

He thought about it for a moment:

"Can I touch you?

-Nope. When we are not having sex, don't lay a finger on me.

-Then can we have sex?"

Gilbert looked at his watch.

"I can't today."

Andrew wanted to trap Gilbert in his arms but he refrained from doing so because he was scared he would leave if he did something he didn't like. I watched them talk from afar not knowing what to think. Even if it was an act, Andrew had been horrible to Gilbert and I wasn't happy to see him being so clingy now.

After Gilbert left I decided to look for Cadmael anyway. Even if my plan didn't work, I was the one who dirtied his shirt and I still felt bad. Especially now that it felt like it was in vain. I found him in the toilet. He was shirtless and was washing it in the sink with furrowed brows. He still didn't smile when he saw me arrive. I rarely saw his childlike smile lately. Maybe it was since I started pushing him into dating Diana.

I felt bad. I knew that Gilbert was right. I wasn't supposed to push people into liking each other. I was only going to make them hate one another even more. But it was frustrating to be the only one to know. I knew that they were supposed to be together but I couldn't explain it to them. How would they feel if they knew they were characters in a book? Did I have the right to tell them? I sincerely just wanted them to be happy.

The plot was all over the place. Cadmael was just a weak child but we were working on that and he won the tournament. I was turning him into the emperor without having to bully him. I thought that everything was going fine but now another problem had arisen. What could I do? What would become of the book if it wasn't a romance anymore? I knew nothing and didn't know what to do. For now, Cadmael was mad and I had to apologize:

"I'm so sorry about your shirt. I didn't mean to.

-It doesn't matter."

He acted as if he didn't mind but I felt that he was still mad.

"Are you mad at me?

-I would never be mad at you.

-But you don't seem fine... I am really sorry. I knew that you didn't like Diana and asked to eat together. I just really wanted the two of you to like each other."

Cadmael suddenly turned to me and I jumped in surprise.

"I would never get angry at you. You could do anything, Eschyle. Just don't push me away."

I didn't understand what he was talking about when he suddenly started crying. I immediately panicked and rushed to hug him forgetting that he was shirtless.

"I'm so sorry! I never wanted to push you away, silly. Diana and you are my good friends and I really just wanted both of you to be happy.

-Why do you want me to be happy with her?

-Do you believe in fate?

-No."

He didn't hesitate for a second and my head jerked up. How was I going to explain?

"I just felt really bad when I thought about the way things are between you two. You started off on the wrong foot but she really is a nice person, I promise."

Being in his arms, our faces were very close to one another and I suddenly realized what we looked like. I realized that my arms were touching his skin and quickly retracted them. Cadmael didn't let me go, his eyes focused on mine.

"I have you."

I was really uncomfortable and escaped from his arms quickly.

"One friend is good but the more the merrier. You would be really happy if you had other friends too.

-I don't need other friends.

-You will."

He would become the emperor and this position was very risky. He needed people he could trust. I wasn't going to be there for him forever. As if he heard my thoughts, Cadmael's eyes grew bigger. He grabbed my shoulders with force:

"You are all I need. Without you I don't know what I would do.

-But...

-I don't trust anyone else."

I thought he would leave but he kept his eyes locked with mine as if making sure that I heard him correctly. I didn't know what to say. Did I make a mistake? I only wanted to help this child but I became the only person he trusted. I didn't know if this was good or bad. Being someone he trusted, he wouldn't kill me right? But what about keeping my distance from him?

"You were the only one who helped me. I'll never forget it."

Seeing him like this warmed my heart. This child suffered so much and now I finally managed to bring him happiness. Was it selfish of me to want to look after him some more? We still had time before he became the emperor. I could still disappear then. But did I really have to? The way he was now, Cadmael wasn't a ruthless emperor. Maybe he wouldn't kill me. Then could I stay beside him?

I smiled before rubbing his head:

"Show me your shirt, I'll help you clean it."

Cadmael smiled. I finally saw his childish smile and the atmosphere between us became the same as before.