[BL] I shouldn't have married the crown prince

Chapter 69

When I came back to our room that night I felt really anxious for some reason. While I was pushing the door I was praying for Cadmael not to be here but I immediately spotted him sitting on the sofa with a serious look. Hearing me come in, he immediately put his book down and smiled at me:

"Did you have a good day?"

I quickly nodded and started playing with my fingers, avoiding his eyes:

"I did. What about you?"

Cadmael shook his head:

"I am never happy when you are away from me."

My heart skipped a beat and the air grew even more awkward for some reason. None of us could forget about what happened earlier that day and I really wanted to change the subject so I just said the first thing I could think of:

"Gilbert left."

Cadmael started beaming which made me frown:

"Forever?

-I hope not."

Hearing my answer Cadmael quickly coughed:

"You must be very sad. I am sorry. Do you want to talk about it?"

I shrugged:

"It's okay. He told me that he just wanted to leave... I didn't expect it to be this soon."

Cadmael bit his lips and went silent for a bit before saying:

"Do you want me to bring him back?"

I quickly raised my hands as if trying to stop him from doing something dumb:

"No! No... Thank you but we shouldn't force him to come back if he doesn't want to. He must have his reasons. And for some reason I feel like he won't be gone for long."

Cadmael sighed:

"That's too bad."

I tilted my head before saying:

"Cadmael..."

The latter pretended as if nothing and just smiled:

"Yes?"

I shook my head with a laugh:

"You are really something.

-Do you like it?"

I smiled and looked Cadmael straight (you mean gay) in the eyes:

"Very much."

I didn't know if I had ever seen Cadmael blush before but hearing my answer, the latter had to look away. Seeing him like this finally made my muscles relax and I walked closer to the sofa:

"I was thinking...

-Anything you want.

-We should buy passifloras. Those flowers make me think of you."

Cadmael immediately nodded and now that I was close enough, his arm found its place around my waist naturally.

"What else makes you think of me?"

It seemed he didn't understand where I was getting at and that made me feel a bit shy. I thought about his question instead. While I was thinking, I brushed away a strand of hair from his eyes. Feeling me graze his skin, Cadmael immediately froze.

"A lot of things: sparring, books, horses, jewelry, lemon candies... The last one is a bit random, sorry."

As I was talking, he pulled me closer and made me sit on his lap.

"It isn't. You did promise that you would stay by my side because I always have lemon candy on me."

And just as if to prove himself, Cadmael took a candy out of his pocket before handing it to me:

"I promise you that I will never run out of candy."

I smiled before taking the candy. At that moment I didn't care about it at all but I needed some courage to say what I wanted:

"We should have lemon candy at the reception."

Cadmael frowned:

"What reception?"

I really wanted to look him in the eyes when I said that but feeling my cheeks grow warm, I couldn't help look down:

"Our wedding of course."

The next second Cadmael grabbed my chin and gently but with strength, he forced me to look up at him:

"What did you say?"

I really wanted to repeat myself but seeing him stare at me like that made me bite my lip. Cadmael was quicker, however and he slipped his thumb between my teeth:

"What did you say?"

Seeing that I couldn't talk with a finger in my mouth, Cadmael pulled it out and started gently caressing my lips. I could feel my heart accelerate and did my best to calm down:

"For our wedding.

-Are we getting married?

-Yes."

I thought that he would jump all around or jump on me but surprisingly, Cadmael froze:

"We are getting married?

-Yes.

-Really?"

I nodded and the next second I saw tears flowing out of his eyes. It had been a long time since I had last seen him cry and I had no idea what to do. I cupped his face with my hands and started wiping his tears:

"Why are you crying?

-Are we really getting married?

-Yes. I can't imagine getting married to anyone else but you, Cadmael."

He didn't stop crying and kissed me. His kiss was salty because of the tears and for the first time, Cadmael was the one who came out of breath first. Seeing him all shaken made me smile and I pulled him closer to me:

"You are my only family, Cadmael. I want to marry you."

The Emperor cried in my arms for long minutes that night, kissing me every moment he calmed down a bit. In the middle of a kiss he excused himself and left for the bathroom for a few minutes. When he came back he was a completely different person. All his energy came back and he lifted me in his arms before carrying me to his study. There he showed me all the preparations and asked me about my opinion. I had no idea that he would be so excited about planning the wedding.

Cadmale had already picked out 5 potential color pallets as well as the menu but he was ready to change anything if I said I didn't like it. I didn't say that because Cadmael knew me better than I thought and everything he did was perfect. Way more perfect than I thought. Seeing him plan the wedding with Alphonse and others later on made me realize how much of a control freak he was. Everything had to be perfect and I felt that the Empire wasn't getting a lot of sleep because of that.

For the next few months I only heard about the wedding and Cadmael completely forgot about his own birthday that I was the only one planning at this point. I couldn't even find a pastry chef because everyone was ordered to work on the wedding. I didn't know if this should stress me out or make me happy. Actually it kind of did both. And as I was the only one left paying attention to Cadmael's birthday, I didn't really pay attention to the list of guests for the wedding. I knew that people from all around the world were invited to attend the wedding but I didn't know more than that. At least until I ran into Marvin.