𝐗𝐗𝐈𝐗.

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She didn't call

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She didn't call.

There wasn't a hint of Kennedy all day Wednesday. After I got in from the community center I sat and waited for a call or a text—some sign that she was coming through.

   By the time the sun went down, I'd given up entirely.

   I could've called her, and ordinarily, I would've, but then I thought about the possibility of her being around her family. Around him. She probably had me saved under an alias, but it was a chance I wasn't willing to take. To potentially get her in a sticky situation.

   Looking at my blank lock screen, I shook my head and shoved my phone back into my pocket.

   It would always be this way. Operating on her time. Something I'd known from the beginning and had so easily accepted.

   The fact of the matter was, I was nothing more than a side-piece. Convenient dick whenever Kennedy needed it. It was a bitter pill to swallow, but there was no other way to feel as I came to realize I'd be spending my Wednesday evening alone.

   Fingering the pendant hanging from the necklace around my neck, a slight sense of guilt overtook me as I wrote off whatever the fuck this was I had with Kennedy. I knew what I saw when she looked at me, and I knew what I felt when I was with her.

   Maybe I was more than a booty call, but that didn't stop the irritation from stirring.

   I still needed to cook, but I found myself grabbing my pack of Newports and heading out to my back patio.

   The first intake of nicotine calmed my nerves and curved my appetite. The second intake cleared my mind.

   I was gearing up to jut out my second cigarette when I caught myself. Reluctantly I blew out a stream of smoke and stubbed out my cigarette before stuffing it back into the pack.

   Enough.

   I needed to make better choices in my life. No more getting wrapped up in women who weren't hundred percent available, and no more fucking up my lungs with this nicotine.

   I gotta let these bad habits go.

   The night air danced around me and cooled my mood, settling my decision even more.

   Heaving a sigh, I tilted the pack and poured that half-finished cigarette into my palm and relit it. What the hell? What was one last taste before I gave it up for good?


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Frustrated 🛞 R.LUM.R

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