I Wasn't Her

Part 30

Alaire looked at Dr. Princeton in tears. "You were right to stop it but I didn't listen. Now I'm in a situation that is killing me and I don't know what to do." She wiped her tears but Dr. Princeton seemed unfazed. 

"You need to do it as soon as possible before everything gets out of hand." The night of the engagement party, she headed straight to her room and cried her eyes out. She didn't know what she was going to do. Alaire knew that the news about calling off the wedding would be disappointing but things took a turn for the worst.

"I'm going to talk to him about calling off the wedding tonight. I care about him and his father too much to do this to them."

"So you have feelings for this man?" Alaire nodded, looking down in shame. "I figured it out a while now, I just chose to ignore it because I was afraid it would end up like Westly."

Alaire felt a pain in her chest but ignored it. "Are you alright, Alaire?"

"Yes, the guilt has been killing me these days. The very thought of it makes my chest hurt." She told her, leaning on the chair, thinking about tonight. "The last thing I want to be, is someone like his mother."

~

Alaire~

"I can't believe you're my daughter sometimes." Daddy gushed as I made me way downstairs. "Daddy, come on, it's just a date." He waved me off, taking pictures. "Still, my daughter is gorgeous." 

I fixed the jewelry on my neck before hearing the doorbell. "Prince Eugene is here." He smiled walking to the door. My heart filled with regret as my chest pinched with pain. "Wow, you always seem to take the words right out my mouth." I felt myself blush a little at his words. "Thank you, you don't look so bad either."

A real smile made its way to my face as he kissed my cheek. I felt my body heat up with his gaze but I tried acting unbothered. "Shall we go?" He nodded his head as we made our way out. "See you later, daddy."

~

We entered the restaurant and I was nothing but amazed. "This place is gorgeous." We made our way to our table which had a window view and it was breath taking. "I brought you hear for a few reasons." Before he could start, the waitress came over.

"Hello, glad to have you all hear, my name is Winnie and I'll be your waitress for the evening. Can I start the lovely couple off with Chateau Cheval Blanc?" She held a bottle of wine with a smile. "Yes please." She poured the wine in our glass.

"I'll give you some time to read over our menu or have you decided what you would order?"

"What would the lady like to have?" Lucian looked at me and I looked at the menu in panic. "Um, how about Lobster, Stuffed Rigatoni, Carrot Purée, and Corn Sabayon?" Winnie nodded, looking at Lucian. "And for you?"

"Same. Thank you." The waitress walked away and Lucian looked at me again with a smile. "As I was saying. The reason I brought you hear today, is the confess how much a love you, Alaire." Love?

"Lucian~"

"No, I fell in love with you a long time ago but I was going through something myself. You may think I'm stupid or crazy but that's fine. I really want to date you, Alaire. I want to be yours. I'll do anything for you."

"I think we're way past the boyfriend and girlfriend stage." I joked. "I won't lie and say that I don't feel anything for you because I do. I want to be with you but this fake engagement scenario is too big. What are we going to do about that?"

He sat there in silence for a while. "I'm not sure." I tried giving the best smile I could. "Well I do. Let's break off the engagement."

His eyes shot to mine. "What? Alaire are you sure?"

"Yes, your father deserves a real daughter in law and you deserve something that truly loves you. You don't deserve any of this. We are hurting ourselves and others in the process. I don't want to hurt you, Lucian."

"You're not hurting me, Alaire."

"I am, I know I am. After what your mother-"

"How do you know about my mother? Did my father tell you about that?" I stayed quiet. 

"Oh God...yes, yes my mother did treat me badly but I'm fine now. I worked through those issues a while ago. I made peace with myself."

"I'm trying to do the same. So please, Lucian, for me, let's drop the act."

The food came and Winnie left with a smile. "Enjoy your meal." I looked at Lucian who seemed frustrated. "It's not an act. I do love you."

"Then what do I like?" Lucian frowned. "What's the thing I hate most in the world? What makes me cry? What makes me sad? Why did I become and architect? Can you answer any of those because I sure as hell can't."

"...I can't but that doesn't change the way I feel about you. We're here now, tell me everything about yourself."

I was about to answer until the pain in my chest pounded harshly, causing me to choke. Lucian immediately perked up, coming to my side. "What's happening? Where does it hurt? Do we need to take you to the hospital?" I couldn't form any words.

"Is everything alright?" Winne rushed up. "I'm not sure." I saw Lucian pay for the meal, taking me into his arms. "I'm taking you to the hospital." I moaned out in pain, holding my chest. Something was completely wrong.

~

I sat on the bed looking at the doctor in front of me. I was too shock to move from my spot. "Are you sure?" I asked him. "Yes, I'm terribly sorry but we caught it in its early stage so there are options available." My hand went to my breasts. 

I had stage one breast cancer. 

A knock echoed as my father walked in. "I'm really tired of being here. The next time you're allowed here is when you're in labour. Do you hear me?" Then and there the water works began.

"Daddy!" I cried making him rush to my side. I couldn't stop the tears from falling, no matter how much he wiped my face. How was I going to tell him? "What's wrong with her? Why is she crying so much?" I could hear the worry in his voice.

"Don't tell him!" I told the doctor. "Ma'am I would advise you to have as much support as you can. Fighting this won't be easy." With that, the doctor walked out the room. "Fight what? Alaire?"

"I'm sorry, daddy, I'm so sorry, I didn't want this to happen." He's been through so much in this life. "Alaire, you tell me what's going on this instant."

"I...I have stage one breast cancer." I felt his hands turn cold. His eyes drifted to the ceiling as tears ran down his face. "God, why." In all the years I've known myself, I've never seen my father cry as much as this.

"My beautiful daughter." He held me in his arms as he cried but I knew he was thinking of mom. "They caught it early! So don't cry. There are more options now and I'll be fine in a few months. Don't cry daddy, please." 

He shook his head, rubbing my back. "I will do everything in my power this time that nothing goes wrong. We will do this together."

Even though, I'm the one with the problem I was afraid that this may hurt daddy more than me.