I Wasn't Her

Part 31

Alaire~

Lucian sat next to me on the bed. "I don't know what to say." Was all he could muster up. "There really is nothing to say." He held her hand, rubbing it. "What did the doctor say?"

"I have Ductal Carcinoma. He said it was one of the most treatable cancers so he wants to do surgery to remove the tumor. Then radiation for about three weeks" I felt his forehead on mine, making me lean on him. "I'm scared to be honest."

"I can't even imagine what you're going through but I won't ever leave your side. I'll be with you whenever you need me." Hearing those words comforted me more than it should. "Thank you." There was a was knock on the door and in walked Luca with a small smile.

"I just came to see how you were doing my dear. How are you feeling?" Lucian pulled away from me slightly. "I'm fine for now, I'm just a little shock. How's daddy doing? Is he feeling any better?"

Luca sighed. "Well he's awake, his blood pressure is still high so the doctor put him on bed rest." I nodded, feeling my heart squeeze for my father. I was not going to let anything happen to me. I was going to do my absolute best to beat this.

"I'm going to get you something to drink, I'll be back." Lucian kissed the side of my head, leaving me with his father who rubbed my knee softly. Would this be the best time to tell him? I played with the engagement ring on my hand and he smiled.

"If you're worrying about the wedding, don't, I want you to get better first." I'm so tired of crying at this point. "What's the matter? What's stressing you?" He asked, sitting next to me. "I'm so sorry, Luca. You loved me like your own and I'm breaking your heart."

"Breaking my heart? Nonsense! As long as you are alright, there's nothing that can make me upset."

I took some deep breaths in before looking at him. "The engagement...it's not real." Luca straightened up at the news. "I'm sorry, can you repeat that for me?"

"I wanted to get back at my ex husband for cheating on me for years with his assistant. Lucian was there so I...I used him. I did exactly what his mother did to him and I'm so ashamed of myself. I saw how much joy it brought you but I was too selfish to even consider ending it. I wanted my ex to feel the same pain I did."

Luca didn't speak. "So you don't love my son? Even after what I shared with you? You made it come this far? How old are you?"

"Please forgive me, please don't hate Lucian-"

"Was your father apart of this?" He forced out. "It's not about daddy-"

"So he was."

"I'll take the blame for everything so please don't hate him. Don't hate everyone. I'll fix everything." Luca walked to the door. "Being upset with you does seem logical but you don't need that type of burden right now. Please take care of yourself first."

Lucian walked through the door but his father walked right passed him which confused him. "What happened?"

"I told him." Lucian dropped the food on the table running after his father.

~

Lucian~

"Papa, let me explain." He stopped in his tracks, looking over his shoulder at me. "You really disappointed me today, Lucian. You even gave her your grandmother's ring. I thought this was it."

"I know we went about everything wrong but I swear to you that I love this woman. I would do anything for her."

"Does she even know the significance of that ring? Who is belonged to?"

"Papa, are you listening to me?"

"That's what I've been doing but they were all lies. I know you never blamed me for what your mother did but I wish you had just hated me instead." Papa's eyes turned red. "You keep telling me that you're better but here you are letting someone you love use you to get back at someone once again."

"Don't cry papa."

"The wedding is cancelled." With that, he walked out the hospital without turning back. Making my way back to Alaire, I saw her resting. Her beautiful curly hair in a high bun, slight bags hung under her eyes. I never noticed how small she had gotten. 

"You can stop pretending." She slowly opened her eyes, her brown eyes looking into mine. "Is he alright?"

"The wedding is off, just like you wanted." I told her but she frowned. "It was the right thing to do. Too many people would be hurt in this process." I handed her a sub and water. "I'm still not giving up on you, Alaire. I want you to know that."

"Even if I lose all my hair during chemo?" She smiled but I was dead serious. "Bald and all. I don't mind dating a female Westly." She slapped my arm, laughing. "That's not funny." It makes me happy to see her smile.

~

Later that day, Veena and Christopher walked in with red puffy eyes. "Oh my gosh, guys." They both snuggled her on the bed making it hard for her to move. "Don't die and leave me with pretty boy."

"Don't die and leave me with rude mouth!" He sniffed. "Guys, I'm not dying, the doctor said that I just needed surgery to remove it." The scene before me was more funny than sad. "Really? Veena whined, looking at me to confirm.

"Yes, so please let her breathe. You guys will faster kill her." They sat on the chairs in the room, telling her about the latest gossip at work. 

Alaire~

"I told her stop procrastinating and she didn't talk to me for the rest of the day." Christopher rolled his eyes. "It's my work process, I ignore it until last minute and it happens to be my best work. I got it done though."

"Anyway, when will the surgery be held?"

"The doctor told me that they bumped me up to next week and it would be a waist to go home. I decided to stay here until my date."

"So the wedding will be pushed back a little?" I looked at Lucian who excused himself. "What's going on?"

"I couldn't go through with it so I...I told the truth. I told Luca that the engagement was a lie and he called off the wedding. It hurt too much to do this to him. He did me no harm. Thinking back on it, this was so petty. Just to get back at a man that I don't even love or think of anymore."

"That's why it hurts. The purpose of doing this was lost so you now see the pain you might cause others." Chris spoke softly. "We aren't better, we encouraged you to do it because of anger. We're sorry." Veena spoke, looking down.

"It's fine. From here onward, I'll try to fix every mistake that I did."

~

~

Ductal carcinoma in situ (DCIS) is cancer in your breasts' milk ducts. It's considered a noninvasive or pre-invasive cancer. This means that the cancer isn't aggressive and doesn't typically spread beyond your milk ducts. Lumpectomy and radiation are the most common treatments. DCIS is highly treatable, and the prognosis is excellent.
The most common treatments for DCIS are breast-conserving surgery (lumpectomy) with radiation.
 Lumpectomy removes all cancer cells along with healthy breast tissue bordering the cancer growth. Removing small amounts of nearby healthy tissue increases the chance no abnormal cells will be left behind.
Such procedure can leave scarring but it is not the removal of the breast.