Before I Forget

School Stuff

"So you're with Eli again?" Demetri asked, making Sky startle.

They were in his room, sitting on the bed. Sky had always loved Demetri's room - all the Marvel posters on the walls, the bookshelves filled with comic books, fantasy novels, and action figures, the large bed where there was enough room for both of them to just hang out. Demetri's room was cozy and nerdy, it felt safe and fun and it was filled with memories of good times.

On the bed where they both sat cross-legged, Demetri had laid out all the books and notes of the school subjects they shared. Sky was taking pictures of his notes to write the texts into her own notebooks later. She didn't want to fall behind too much, and her mind had been busy with all the things she needed to do to keep up, so Demetri's comment managed to surprise her.

"How did you guess?" She asked, the flushing of her cheeks betraying her emotion.

"I'm not stupid, you know. He came to see you at the hospital bringing all those gifts and flowers, and now your neck is..." Demetri's voice trailed off.

"Crap," Sky said, trying to cover the said neck and the trail of hickies on it with her hair. "I didn't want you to find out like this—"

"You didn't want me to find out. Period." Demetri stated sounding a bit bitter. "Because you knew what I'd say."

"Well then, now you know," Sky couldn't hide the annoyed note in her tone. "Spit it out."

A small silence followed. Sky picked up another notebook from the pile - biology this time - and flipped it open. She frowned at Demetri's horrible handwriting - it would take ages to decipher these hieroglyphs.

"It's just that..." Demetri hesitated. "How can you just forget everything he did? I mean, the trashing of Miyagi-Do and stealing the medal, the way he attacked me at the mall, the school fight? Not to mention how he lied to you—"

"You don't have to tell me, you know. I was there." Sky's words came out a bit sharp. She didn't like to be reminded of those things. She didn't like to think about them.

"Then—" Demetri swallowed. "I don't understand. How can you act like it doesn't matter anymore?"

Sky shrugged. She looked down and kept taking pictures of the notes, turning a page, picking up her phone to take the picture, then putting down the phone and turning another page. It was slow work with one hand, but she didn't mind. It kept her busy so she didn't have to meet Demetri's eyes, his no doubt judgemental glare.

"I almost died. Twice." She finally replied. "Are you seriously going to lecture me about wanting to live?"

"No, but—"

"I was miserable without him. And I don't wanna be like that again. He makes me happy."

"Okay," Demetri said slowly, sounding like he wasn't okay with this at all. "Just saying that he also made you miserable last time."

"I know."

"And you're not scared he's gonna do something like that again? You seriously think it's a good idea to take the risk that he will hurt you again?"

His words made her feel all hollow inside, the memory of the day when she had found the Medal of Honor under the Millenium Falcon T-shirt, was suddenly on her again. The row of small, white pills on her desk, their slightly bitter taste on her tongue. The door of death that had been wide open, the voices calling for her, calling her name so loud that everything else had gone silent.

Sky looked up from Demetri's notebooks, took a couple of shaky breaths to calm herself, and put down her phone.

"To love is to give another person the power to hurt you," She said softly. "And I love him. It might not be smart, but I can't help it."