earned it [h.s.]

60.

first part of a double update!

Harry.

"I'm pregnant."

Silence filled the space, everyone seemingly holding a breath in their throats as I stared at Blair in pure shock.

And I couldn't breathe. I couldn't blink. I couldn't think.

My vision blurred as I stared at Blair, standing in front of me in the outfit she'd been in all day. I hadn't noticed she wore her favourite ensemble, a light brown pencil skirt with a white blouse and a matching blazer.

She always felt like it brought out the colour of her hair and eyes, and that it made her look warm altogether. It was something I would never describe Blair as. Warm. Even now, in the warm tones, her chestnut hair and deep eyes, she looked cold. Ice cold.

She looked familiar, yet like a stranger at the same time which was strange considering I had known her for a very significant part of my life.

As Diane advised me, I refrained from looking at her side of the room the entire time today. I never made eye contact with her or her lawyer, and hardly even looked at the judge. Most of the time today, I wished I could sink through the floor and disappear.

Most of the testimonies today were hard to hear so I continuously wished I could vanish from here and find my comfort in Gen's arms, hide in our own little world where none of this hurt even existed.

That's what had been pulling me through this entire day, the thought that tonight her and I could share a shower, cuddle, kiss and eat together and then fall asleep together. It was all I craved, her touch and her warmth.

"Harry!" Diane's voice sounded sharp as she pulled me out of my train of thoughts. I gasped as I blinked a few times, feeling her tugging on my arm, "Let's go." The room was spinning, I saw Blair twice as I blinked a few times again, my feet moving as Diane pulled on my arm.

"W-Wait," I turned around with a harshly hammering heart, my gaze searching Genevieve's who had tears in her eyes. Her mouth was open in shock, her eyes wide and panicked and her stance broken. My mum held onto her elbow with a similar expression. I swallowed thickly, "Sunny, baby, I-I swear I didn't –" I stopped myself.

Genevieve hesitated for a split second as I stretched out my hand and then took it, shortly nodding, "I-I know." She whispered, her bottom lip wobbling, "I know." Her voice cracked.

Her hand found mine, squeezing softly. My chest burned, my ears were ringing. Diane pulled on my sleeve again, "Harry, let's go." She gritted through her teeth, "let's not do this here."

The entire courtroom was staring at us. Blair stood by herself, her palms on her tummy where she claimed to be growing a child. My child, by the tone of her voice. Bile rose up in my throat, my legs weak as I let Diane pull me away. My hand slipped from Genevieve's who I could faintly feel tightening her grip when she felt me letting go.

We stumbled towards the door with murmurs behind us and I could hardly see or hear where we were headed, "Where's Gen?" I slurred.

"Harry, you're in fucking shock and I need to get you to a fucking separate room right now." Diane hissed. I swallowed the dryness in my throat as I blindly followed her, stumbling to keep up with her pace, "I-I need Gen."

"I'll go get her in a minute, promise. Just need you to go in here and sit down, right now." Diane opened up a door and pushed me inside. I bumped into the mahogany table and she pulled back a chair for me to sit in. She hurried to the other side of the room to get me a glass of water and then pulled me back by my shoulder.