earned it [h.s.]

64. (*)

Harry.

"Mate, would you leave already?" I sighed, leaning my head back on the couch as I tried to fill out my puzzle.

Jeff sat on the other couch, elbows leaned on his knees as he tried to tell me something I did not want to hear.

He tried to talk about Blair, something I had very reserved timeslots for and I had already used up all my minutes today with him talking about her and the baby. I couldn't do it anymore. I pushed my glasses up my nose, lounging around in my own clothing as I focussed on the puzzle.

Eight letters. Noun. Love, loyalty or enthusiasm for a person or activity.

I narrowed my eyes as I looked at the surrounding words, realizing I had only one letter to this word I searched for. I let my eyes gaze over the puzzle as I pressed the end of the pencil into my bottom lip and then softly smiled, nodding to myself.

Devotion.

Genevieve. 

Just thinking of her made my heart flutter like a little butterfly. My lip curled up into a small smile as I filled out the word letter by letter. Like a true sap, I put a tiny heart as a dot on the i.

"Harry, just listen to me." Jeff continued.

I sighed out again and glanced at the clock, "When's the plane landing? Should you really be late to pick up your fiancé from the airport after seeing her again after six months?"

"Shut up." Jeff rolled his eyes, "I'll be fine. I just need you to fucking listen to me."

I put down the pencil, my feet on the coffee table with fuzzy socks on as I put down my newspaper.

As a surprise, Genevieve got me a subscription to a newspaper while I lived at Jeff's house. It meant daily crossword puzzles for me, and it perked me up more than I cared to admit. Her and I took pleasure in the small things these days, and my face had lit up in delight when the first newspaper arrived.

"I don't want to talk about her."

"This isn't about her." Jeff retorted, "This is about you. Listen, I've got an idea."

I pinched the bridge of my nose after pushing the glasses up in my hair, sighing out in defeat. I felt tired again, listening to him. Just thinking of it was exhausting by itself, let alone constantly having my friends go on about it. It was a vast contrast to how Genevieve and I handled it, by barely talking about it ever since I cried and clung to her like a koala, begging her not to leave me.

It was a little over a week later, and tomorrow I had a meeting with Blair at the hospital. For a scan. Twelve weeks.

"Fine." I admitted defeat and Jeff smirked at his victory before licking his lips and turning serious again. He clasped his fingers together, "I need you to get a paternity test tomorrow."

I stared at him, "Are you serious."

"Dead." Jeff nodded, "Just think about it. This is your final way out. Who's to say this baby is yours, H.? Blair is talking out of her ass half the time, she'd do anything to manipulate you. And I know for some reason you still hope that she has some good in her and wouldn't lie about something like that, but if I were you... I'd want to know for sure."

I shifted uneasily on the couch as I thought of his words. I had never considered the fact that Blair could be lying about the baby being mine. As far as I knew, she wasn't with anyone else during that time. As far as she knew back then, I wasn't either.

I swallowed, wondering if she was leading me on. Wondering if this was my way out.

Did I want it to be my way out?