The Hermitcraft Plays

13: The Great Hermit Role Switch 2022

Joe arrived first to the stage the next day, completely oblivious about what he'd done, but starting to miss his director's script. The other hermits started to arrive, and everything stayed alright.

Until Grian sauntered in, a script in each hand, followed by Cub and Scar.

'Hey, Joe. I've got something of yours.' He held up the director's script. The ex-director's expression turned to confusion and horror.

'What?'

'Yeah, Cub gave it to me.'

Joe didn't speak for a moment, glaring at Cub.

'I did do a run-through of our scenes with Scar first. But Grian asked me to help him get the script and I... helped him.'

'Now, anyone who wants to be part of my chaos give me your script.' A surprising number of hermits obeyed. Joe was glaring at Cub still, regretting every one of his actions, as Grian gathered everyone except, Etho ('I'M A TREE'), Doc and Xisuma's script before asking. 'Does anyone want any particular role that isn't their own?'

'One of the three dumb men!' Ren replied instantly, grinning. 

'Can I... nominate Scar for that too?' But Cub's question didn't prove too much for the ever-excited Scar, who snatched up Impulse's script, before giving Tango's to Cub.

'This is going to be incredible... I kind of want to be evil...' Grian kept Scar's script, before offering Cub's as though at an auction. 'Who wants to be Cub?'

Pearl gave a Double-life-esque laugh, before taking his script. It didn't take long for the rest to be handed around to various different hermits.

'Right, let's start with the final scene... everyone in the scene, let's go!' 

The new actors entered the scene, ready to begin.

'I will MURDER YOU!' Declared Zed-dolf. 'Bells was innocent!'

'Wels is just as bad as the rest of you. You cannot defeat us, we're stronger than you! If we can defeat the Christmas God, we can defeat you!' Grian laughed back, faking Scar's accent intentionally badly. The actual Scar burst out into what was either laughter or crying. 

'Fight me here and now and we'll see.'

'Alright then. You with all your powers and me with mine.'

'Zed, stop this! You can't fight him and win!' Pleaded Impearlie

'Maybe fighting is but the next great adventure...' Scar wondered. Grian laughed back

'Wait, this sounds too much like...'

'Landscaping your mind, chapter 15!' Burst out Scar, very excitedly to a lot of laughter. 'Close your eyes... you are on a boat in the middle of an endless ocean that represents your hopes, dreams, ambitions and the unknown... the boat you're on is all that you know, the safety of your home and friends... will you dive into the waters and seek your destiny or remain on your little boat forever, tossed and turned by the waves of adventure, but never getting close enough to fully grasp it, to dive into the seas... why is everyone laughing?!' Scar opened his eyes to see Cub broken with laughter, and Grian screeching in the audience.

'This is the best idea I've ever had.' Grian managed to wheeze out. 'Can we... continue the script?' But Cub was laughing too much, and soon Scar joined in, until his friend regained control again, taking a deep breath and declaring.

'We will fight back! For the Christmas God!'

'Yeah!' 

'Ah, dudes. We must all stand and fight, man. Peace, and love, and murder, dude!' The newly arrived Hippie Ren replied