The Hermitcraft Plays

3: Directed

Scene 1 went surprisingly well, until Joe wasn't there to end it and they crashed, rather promptly, into the first song.

'Let's show him how real storytellers do it! Awww yeah!' Xander Bartholomew Expositionus proclaimed excitedly.

Silence.

'The next line is "SONG 1: This is Hermit Town" apparently. Joe? Do we we continue past the song we don't have lyrics or tune for or...' Beef asked. But Joe wasn't there. 

'He's still talking to Grian,' Cleo explained, glancing to where the two were screaming at each other.

'Yep. Definitely talking,' False replied. Meanwhile, Martyn had been giving out lyrics to the 4 narrators.

'Your part of the song will be rapped,' he directed, ignoring Joe's absence. 'It's a very simple rhythm for most of it... Oli, give us the tune.'

'Of course I'll play the sweet sweet tunes for you, Marty,' Oli grinned

'Great... kick us off, I'll help you know the rhythm... go!'

Oli began playing. Scar, who'd disappeared, returned with popcorn to watch Grian and Joe's argument.

'...we wanted to take, and I chose to take this role!' Grian insisted.

'But I'M director! Remember what happened last time?!'

'And remember that I'm the only reason we had a play? BOTH times?' 

'What are you suggesting, Grian?' Joe snapped back. 'That I'm not a good enough director?'

'Of course not! I'm just saying I'm more sensible than you give me credit for!'

'...Adventure!'

'Cunning!'

'And strength, aww yeah!' The song continued behind.

'And our tale begins in that house over there.'

'A hero called Gem, with a want to be seen.'

'Is whom we choose to start our scene.'

'THAT WAS CUB AND SCAR'S IDEA!' 

'I was wondering when we'd come up...' Scar mumbled to Cub, who nodded. 

'Yeahhh... we possibly might've not been Joe's favourite hermits...'

'Alright! And now as we pass Oli's dramatic piano...'

'Pretend it's a full dramatic orchestra!' Oli's piano moved to a whole set of majestic chords, before softening. 

'And, Gem, this is where you start.'

'What's the tune?!' Gem replied. 'I can't sing something if I don't know the tune!'

'Uhh... Oli?'

'Is she gonna start singing soon or should I continue playing the same 4 notes repeatedly?'

'Continue playing, I'll try to sing it the best I can.'

'They're still going,' Scar noted over Martyn's rendition of the first song as Cub returned from grabbing more popcorn at his base. 'Grian's threatening revolution.'

'Just because it's called a play DOESN'T MEAN YOU TREAT IT LIKE A GAME!' Joe yelled. 'As director of the Hermit Musical, I declare that you're NOT DIRECTOR! Why can't you accept that?!'

'Because everyone else wants to do what they want! Impulse gets to play drums, Cub gets to save everyone in the play, SCAR'S been allowed to SING because you thought he wanted to, but I don't get to direct!' Joe took a deep breath, calming down. 

'I just don't want you to mess this up.'

'And I don't want you to make this play a stressful, overly serious, or in any way negative experience for any of us. Look, I won't take complete control of the play and mess up your plans. I just want you to agree that, if you cause any harm, or start going mental and shouting at people while rehearsing the play, I can be a director too.'

'It's just a musical, Grian! The only 'mental' is the instrumental!'

'And if you don't agree, I'll pretend to be director until you do,' Grian finished, walking away to where Gem was singing her solo remarkably well. Joe ran after.

'Grian- no- wait- GRIAN!'

'This is our town, where we grew up! Watched by the crown of the king above! Where heroes are born, Alliances sworn... This is hermit town!' Gem sung as Impulse and Pearl cheered her on. At the sight of Joe, Oli stopped his pianoing.

'Right!' Joe and Grian began at the same time, then stopped and looked at each other. Joe scowled. Grian smiled. 

'Right then...' Grian continued, stepping in front of Joe, 'we've decided that until Joe lets me direct when he goes crazy, I'm officially director... Gem, that sounded great. What's the next part of the song?'

'A whole lot of mini solos.'

'Who for?'

'A lot of the cast except for Cub, Scar, Joel, and Pearl. They're all in the lyric books. We've based this first song very strongly off of 'Belle' from Beauty and the Beast.'

'The remake's better,' Cub called. Scar shoved him over. 

'No!'

'False, you start us off with 'this is our town, where the people dwell.' and then it's Keralis, then Ren, then Cleo and Stress sing in unison, Impulse, Tango, Etho...'

'Wait, Treetho's in this scene?' Etho scanned the script excitedly. 'Where?'

'I... thought you could play the teacher in the school?' Martyn suggested. Etho looked scandalised.

'Etho only plays trees,' explained Grian. 'But I though we could stage this as each person goes onstage left, then right, then left, than right. So... everyone on an even number line to the left, and anyone left go to the right.' 

'Grian, is that anyone on the left, or anyone left over?'

'Alright, let's continue... everyone left on the right. Then, everyone on the left, who's starting on stage right, when you say your line you walk across the stage to stage left.'

The villager chorus, already confused by their solos and the tune of the song, were all mostly stood in the centre of the stage space Keralis had created instead of listening. Grian was grinning at their confusion. 

'All that's left to say is... did I get that across right?'

'Grian, you're NOT DIRECTOR!'

'Cub, Scar, back me up, guys. You heard what Joe said.'

'Oh, yes.' Scar, still confused by all the directors and directions, just nodded. 'Grian's director now.'

'Yeah,' Cub confirmed. 'He is.'

'Really?' Mumbo said. 'Congratulations, Grian!'

'Sounds about right to me.' Joel shrugged. Joe made a noise between a sob, and groan, and a sigh.

'This is the last thing I wanted to happen... Grian is NOT director!'

'Not if you say I can be when you start yelling at my friends and taking this to seriously.'

'Which will NOT happen! Grian is NOT director! False, Ren, Impulse, Skizz, you start on the left over here, and Keralis, Cleo, Stress, Tango and Zedaph you start on the right and when you say your line, you come on and cross to the opposite side of the stage, ok?' Everyone understood. 

'And everyone left offstage, you're...'

'GRIAN YOU ARE NOT DIRECTOR AND YOU NEVER WILL BE!' Joe yelled. 'OK?' Grian looked unfazed, crossing his arms. 'I won't change my mind. I'm used to your chaos. I'm ready for whatever you have in store!'

'Good. You'll need to be.'